Marauder Mayhem
by Raven McKinnon
Summary: Padfoot's on the prowl...but what will he do when the first girl to ever turn him down becomes one of his best friends? Will the one and only Sirius Black give up his womanizing ways? Story will continue through the Marauder's 7th year to present day.
1. Chapter 1

Marauder Mayhem  
  
A/N: Hi everybody! My name's Raven and I'll be your Harry Potter Freak today! Yes, I am VERY obsessed with all things Harry Potter, especially Sirius Black. He will always be my favorite character. This fanfic is about the Marauders when they were in their 7th year at Hogwarts. Please feel free to IM or email me on AOL if you're confused about something or just wanna talk about HP (VulpixRaven@aol). Please review and tell me how I'm doing. Hope you like it!  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Witchy Woman" by The Eagles and "Dirty Denim" by The Donnas.  
  
Chapter 1 - August 1st  
  
"Padfoot!"  
  
Sirius spun around. "There he is!" He and James hugged like brothers.  
  
"How was your summer?" inquired James of his best friend.  
  
"Summer? She was awesome. And I also met a girl named Autumn; she was good, too."  
  
"Jesus Christ, Sirius! How many girls could you have possibly gotten in two months?" exclaimed James, ruffling his black hair and straightening his glasses.  
  
"I lost count," said Sirius, nonchalantly.  
  
"Womanizer!" a voice called from behind them.  
  
They both spun around this time to see sandy-haired Remus Lupin. "Moon- pie!" exclaimed Sirius pulling his other best friend into a hug.  
  
"I thought you said you couldn't make it, Moony," said James.  
  
"Mum let me leave work early. I only just made it," said Remus.  
  
"Where's Pete?" asked Sirius.  
  
"He left a week after you did. Switzerland with his folks," said James.  
  
"Sounds better than Germany with mine," said Sirius, coldly.  
  
"Where they terrible?" asked Remus.  
  
"Don't know how I survived a whole month with those pricks," Sirius said, running his fingers through his black hair, making it fall into his dark brown eyes. "I can't wait till my birthday. I'm getting outta that fucking house forever."  
  
"But who would take you in?" James grinned.  
  
"Uh. you."  
  
"Anytime, Padfoot. I have your room all ready for ya," said James, clapping Sirius on the back. They started walking down the alley, away from their meeting place in front of Quality Quiddich Supplies.  
  
"So how about you gentlemen? Get any ladies?" asked Sirius, turning to wink at them both.  
  
James and Remus exchanged glances. "One," they both said together.  
  
"Really?" asked Sirius, raising his eyebrows twice. "You finally get Evans, Prongs?"  
  
James sighed. "No, but I've got a new game plan this year."  
  
"And what would that be?" inquired Sirius.  
  
"You'll see. Let's just say I've got an insider."  
  
"Alrighty then," said Sirius, doubtfully. He then shifted his gaze upward and did a double take. "What the hell is that?"  
  
James and Remus grinned at each other again. "Unplugged. Brand new club," said James. "Wanna go in?"  
  
"Hell yeah!" shouted Sirius, leading the way. As he opened the door, they were all blasted backwards by a volume of music from inside the club. Sirius' eyes widened. "Holy shit! This is awesome!"  
  
"You haven't even seen the dancers yet," said James, winking at Remus.  
  
"Okay, what's with you two?" Sirius spun around, staring from James to Remus.  
  
"You'll see in a minute."  
  
"You haven't discovered a forbidden love between the two of you or something, have you?" said Sirius, joking.  
  
"What?" James and Remus exclaimed.  
  
"Well. the way you both keep looking at each other and winking is freakin me out!"  
  
"Are you a homophobe, Padfoot?" asked Remus.  
  
"No! I don't hate gay guys!"  
  
"So you love em?" joked James.  
  
"No! I just don't hate em! You guys didn't turn into fudge packers while I was gone, did you?" asked Sirius, hoping it was all a joke.  
  
"No, Padfoot, Remus and I are all wrong for each other," said James.  
  
"Well I could have told you that! So what's the deal then?"  
  
"Would you just come in here? You'll see in a second," said Remus, pushing Sirius through the door.  
  
"This better not be a gay bar," teased Sirius as he stumbled into the club.  
  
"Say that now," said James as Sirius caught sight of a beautiful girl with long black hair as she disappeared through a door that led backstage. Four guys walked onto the stage and started up a song.  
  
"Raven, get your ass out here," one of them said as he pounded on the backstage door. Then he started playing his guitar with the other three members of his band. The black haired girl came out of the door again with her hair in a half ponytail and walked onstage next to the singer as he sang:  
  
"Raven hair," he reached up and pulled the scrunchi out of her hair and let it fall over her shoulders as he continued, "and ruby lips, sparks fly from her fingertips," Raven rolled her eyes and smiled, issuing silver sparks from her fingers. "Echoed voices in the night, she's a restless spirit on an endless flight." Raven started to walk around the stage as all the guys gathered around to watch her. She stepped down from the stage and started milling through the audience. "Whoo-hoo, witchy woman, see how she flies," Raven grabbed a broom from some guy who was carrying one over his shoulder and proceeded to fly slowly around the room. "Whoo-hoo, witchy woman, she got the moon in her eyes." She got off the broom and kicked it back to its owner. "Well I know you wanna love her, but let me tell you, brother, she's been sleepin in the devil's bed." Raven laughed and smiled deviously at the singer. "And there's some rumors goin round, someone's underground. She can rock you in the nighttime till your skin turns red. Whoo-hoo, witchy woman, see how high she flies. Whoo-hoo, witchy woman, she got the moon in her eyes."  
  
The song ended and Raven went backstage again. Sirius stared after her. "I think I'm in love," he teased.  
  
"Yeah, I'm sure you are. And what would you do if I told you she's going to Hogwarts this year?" asked James.  
  
Sirius smiled widely, "I'd kiss you, Jay, even though this isn't a gay bar!"  
  
James jumped back. "Then I guess I won't tell you. I gotta take a piss."  
  
"Oh, me too, man," said Remus, following James to the bathroom.  
  
Sirius stood alone next to the backstage door.  
  
Raven came out of the door a few minutes later in a completely different outfit and looked around.  
  
When she didn't find what she was looking for, she walked over and sat with some other girls at a table.  
  
Sirius looked at her and sighed. "Make a move," he said under his breath as he walked over and sat in the chair next to her.  
  
"Did it hurt?" he asked, flashing her a smile.  
  
Raven turned to look at him with a vacant expression on her face. "Did what hurt?"  
  
"When you fell from heaven," he said, slyly, smiling even wider.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes and downed the rest of her drink. She had heard this pick-up line one too many times before. "Yeah, like a bitch," she replied, dryly.  
  
"Where? I could kiss it and make it all better."  
  
Raven grinned. She had never heard this comeback. "You're offering to kiss my ass, then?"  
  
"If need be. Whatever you like," replied Sirius.  
  
Raven let out a small laugh. "Do you even know my name, stud?"  
  
"Of course I do! Why would I hit on you without knowing your name?" asked Sirius, unconvincingly.  
  
"Well, I'll make you a deal. If you can tell me my name in three guesses, I'll sleep with you," she said, raising her eyebrows once at him.  
  
"Can I have your word on that?" Sirius leaned forward.  
  
"Cross my heart," she answered confidently.  
  
"Great. Let's see. you're name is." Sirius thought for a minute, "Jayme?"  
  
"Swing and a miss."  
  
"Alicia?"  
  
"Strike two."  
  
Sirius looked at the ceiling for an answer. "Bertha?"  
  
Raven laughed. "Loser."  
  
"That's your name?" joked Sirius.  
  
"Uh, no, that's your name," she said as she stood from her chair. "Three strikes, you're out."  
  
"At least I went out swinging."  
  
"Better luck next time," she said as she got up from her chair and went backstage again.  
  
Sirius sighed as James and Remus made their way back over to him. "That was a first," he said as he stood up again.  
  
"What?" asked Remus.  
  
"Nothin," he replied. A new song came on and Raven came out of the backstage door again. "Jesus Christ, she's beautiful!" Sirius hung his head.  
  
James smiled as he made eye contact with Raven and they started walking towards each other as "My Girl" started playing:  
  
"I've got sunshine on a cloudy day. When it's cold outside, I've got the month of May. Well, I guess you'd say: what can make me feel this way?" "How do I look?" asked Raven as she stopped in front of James. He brought his head down so that they foreheads touched. "Like gold." He spun her around and they started dancing to the song. "It's my girl. Talkin 'bout, my girl. My girl. I've got so much honey the bees envy me. I've got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees."  
  
They danced until the end of the song and then Raven threw her arms around James and hugged him. He pulled her into a kiss.  
  
"Wow. Miss me?" giggled Raven when he finally let go of her.  
  
"Yeah," he said as he kissed her again.  
  
Then he led her over to where Sirius was still standing with a vacant expression on his face.  
  
"Hi, Moony!" said Raven, hugging and kissing Remus, too.  
  
"Raven McKinnon, I want you to finally meet Sirius Black," said James.  
  
Raven took one look at Sirius and burst out laughing. "You're Sirius?"  
  
"In my better days, yeah, I am," answered Sirius, slightly embarrassed.  
  
"Wait, you two know each other?" asked James, confused.  
  
"Oh yeah, we're old friends. Right, Sirius?"  
  
Sirius cleared his throat, "Uh, yeah," he answered uncomfortably. He knew she was going to tell James what he'd just done.  
  
"How the hell do you know each other?" asked James.  
  
"Oh, he just hit on me," said Raven, coolly.  
  
"He-you did?" James turned to Sirius, who bit his bottom lip and looked up at the ceiling. James laughed. "And how did he do?" he asked, turning back to Raven.  
  
"Crashed and burned," conveyed Raven, beginning to laugh again. "It wasn't pretty."  
  
"Aw, poor Sirius. I should have warned you, man. She's a man-eater. She does that to everyone in here."  
  
"Hey, can you blame me? I work in a bar for Christ's sake. A girl's gotta watch out for herself," defended Raven. "Besides, that pick-up line was ancient. 'Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?'" mimicked Raven.  
  
At this, James burst out laughing, too. "Sirius, I thought you were good with girls!"  
  
"Normal girls," teased Sirius.  
  
Raven scoffed. "What did you say?"  
  
"Nothin. So, can I guess your name now?"  
  
"Nope, game's over."  
  
"What?" asked James.  
  
"Never mind."  
  
"So, I take it you finally gave up on Evans?" asked Sirius.  
  
"What? Hell no. This is my new game plan," he said, pointing to Raven.  
  
"Make her jealous? I don't think that's gonna work, Jay."  
  
"No. Raven is Lily's best friend," said James, winking at Sirius.  
  
"When did all this happen? How did you guys all meet?" asked Sirius, still very confused.  
  
"A week after you left is when we saw her again," Remus explained.  
  
"Again?"  
  
"It's a long story," said Raven. "I've known James since I was a baby. Our parents were best friends. We lived right next door to each other, actually. But then my parents died and I had to go live with my uncle in America."  
  
"But now she's back and we're inseparable again," added James.  
  
"So how does Moony know her?" asked Sirius.  
  
"I met her the summer after our fourth year," answered Remus.  
  
"My uncle got married in London and I showed up on his doorstep trying desperately to get away from my new step brother," joked Raven.  
  
"You were in France that year, I think," said James to Sirius.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes. "And I'll never hafta go on another fucking family vacation again if I can help it."  
  
"Where the hell is Raven?" yelled an eccentric looking man out the backstage door so that Raven could hear him clearly.  
  
"Good old Gus. He fire you yet this month?" questioned James.  
  
"Not yet. And I stress yet! I gotta go work."  
  
Then Gus spotted Raven. "McKinnon! Don't bring your boyfriends in here. You know my policy on that."  
  
"And what exactly is your policy, Augustus?" asked Raven, walking towards him. "That if you're not getting any then no one can?" She disappeared through the door.  
  
Gus rolled his eyes and turned to the singer of the band that sang "Witchy Woman." "How many times have I fired her?"  
  
"Five or six?" guessed the singer.  
  
"Eight!" said Raven, reappearing next to them and winking at Sirius. "We're on, Anthony," she said to the singer.  
  
"Yep," he replied. They walked off behind the stage.  
  
"Like her, hey?" James asked Sirius.  
  
"Is that a joke?"  
  
They were interrupted by the start of the next song. It was Raven's band and Raven started to sing:  
  
"You look like you only slept for an hour. You smell like you haven't taken a shower. And your hair is so dirty. It makes you look like you're thirty. Your pants are slung way too low. I see stuff I don't wanna know. I wonder why you're so moody. Is it because you got no booty? Baby, please you must be outta your mind. Do I look like I want your dirty denim? Listen up, I'm only sayin this one more time. Can you hear me sayin I don't want you dirty denim? I hate to say it, but they're all the same, thinkin everybody knows their name. But how can they break my heart, if I can't even tell them apart. I can tell that you think I'm impressed. But do you think you're gonna get me undressed? Cuz if ya do, I got bad news: I wasn't winkin, that was just the booze. I don't want your, I don't need your. I don't want your, I don't need your. You paid two hundred dollars to look like that? You oughta check out the laundromat!"  
  
"Oh my god, Prongs, how could you not tell me about her? I've never met anyone like her before. She's gorgeous, she's got a beautiful voice-"  
  
"She shot you down," interrupted James.  
  
"Yeah, that was different."  
  
"Well get used to it," said Raven, suddenly standing behind him. "Sirius, ya smoke?"  
  
"Yeah," he answered.  
  
"C'mon," she said, tugging his sleeve.  
  
"What?" he asked, taking a few steps forward.  
  
"C'mon!" she tugged his sleeve a little harder. Raven led Sirius through the backstage door, down a hallway, and to a door that had her name on it.  
  
"Your dressing room?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Yep."  
  
"What're we doin in here?" he asked, raising his eyebrows at her.  
  
Raven held up the pack of Newport Lights she had just gotten from a drawer. Then she went back into the hallway, with Sirius behind her, and out the door at the end. Sirius stepped out after her, onto the grass. Raven sat on a bench and lit a cigarette, and Sirius did the same.  
  
He took a breath. "Menthol?"  
  
"It's all I ever smoke," she answered.  
  
"I've never tried one. Figured they'd be gross."  
  
"They're not." She handed him her cigarette, and he took a drag.  
  
"Refreshing," he said. "Surprisingly refreshing."  
  
Raven laughed. "So does James get on your case about smoking like he does mine?"  
  
"Uh, yeah. Big time."  
  
"I told him to fuck off."  
  
"Me too!" said Sirius. "Exact words!" They both laughed this time.  
  
"So what's your deal?" asked Raven.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Well, all I know is that you're James' best friend in the whole world, you're a troublemaker, Jay told me to stay away from you-"  
  
"What? He told you that?" interrupted Sirius.  
  
"Yep."  
  
"Dammit! And do you always do what he tells you?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Oh good!"  
  
"But it doesn't mean I always do the opposite, either," Raven added quickly.  
  
"So what exactly did he tell you about me?"  
  
"He said, 'love em and leave em' is your motto."  
  
Sirius scoffed. "Well that's his motto, too!"  
  
"Oh, I know."  
  
"But I think he might not do the leavin as soon if he ever got Evans."  
  
"He will."  
  
Sirius shook his head. "She hates his guts."  
  
"No she doesn't. She pretends to because she's ashamed that she wants him," explained Raven.  
  
"How do you know this? Did she admit it?"  
  
"I'm a girl. I just know these things." Sirius gave her a doubtful look. Raven flicked her cigarette into the grass and lit another. "Okay, maybe she's not head over heels yet, but she hasn't seen him in awhile, and I've been teaching James a few things."  
  
"Like what?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Well, the first thing that turned her off about him, she told me this, was his arrogance."  
  
"My best friend isn't arrogant!" Sirius also lit another cigarette.  
  
"I know that, when he's around us. But when she's around, he doesn't know how to act, so he shows off really bad. And it comes off as arrogance."  
  
"Do you take Legilimency?" wondered Sirius.  
  
"No, I just understand people really well, I guess."  
  
"Yeah, it's kinda freaky. So you got a boyfriend yet?"  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "Don't even try it, Black."  
  
"What? I'm just asking!" defended Sirius.  
  
"I'm not your type, believe me."  
  
"Yes you are! You're everyone's type!"  
  
Raven let out a laugh. "You gonna give me some more of your brilliant pick- up lines? Cuz I guarantee you I've heard most if not all of them."  
  
Sirius scoffed and ran a hand through his hair. "No you haven't."  
  
"Try me," she challenged, looking sideways at him.  
  
Sirius let out a laugh and slid over next to her. "So what are the chances we that we could engage in anything more than just conversation?"  
  
Raven smiled. "Slim to none."  
  
Sirius perked up. "So you're tellin me there's a chance?"  
  
A/N ON WHY I'M WRITING THIS: FIRST OF ALL, I KNOW VERY WELL THAT THIS IS CONSIDERED MARY-SUEISM. I STARTED WRITING THIS FANFIC 5 YEARS AGO, WHEN I WAS 14 AND DIDN'T KNOW WHAT A MARY-SUE WAS. NOW THAT I DO KNOW, I DON'T MIND IT TOO MUCH, BUT IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH MARY-SUE'S EITHER DON'T READ THIS, OR GIVE THE ENTIRE STORY A CHANCE AND TRY TO OVERLOOK IT. I DO THINK IT GETS BETTER WITH THE CHAPTERS I'VE ADDED ON. I WROTE ABOUT 15 CHAPTERS OF THIS WHEN I WAS 14 AND THEN DECIDED TO PICK THIS BACK UP LAST YEAR. I REALLY LIKE HOW SIRIUS' PERSONALITY TURNED OUT, AND I'M NOT GOING TO GIVE UP WRITING THIS JUST BECAUSE IT'S MARY-SUEISTIC. ALSO, I REALIZE THAT THERE ARE A LOT OF SONGS/MOVIES/THINGS THAT DID NOT FIT IN THE MARAUDER ERA. FOR EXAMPLE IN THIS CHAPTER, "DIRTY DENIM" WASN'T WRITTEN UNTIL THIS CENTURY AND I ALSO REFRENCE MANY MOVIES FROM THE '90'S/00'S. I USED TO POST THIS FANFIC AS A JOURNAL ENTRY ON BLURTY.COM AND YOU COULD LIST SONGS/MOVIES THAT WENT ALONG WITH YOUR ENTRY FOR THAT DAY. THIS IS WHAT PROMPTED ME TO INCLUDE THESE SORTS OF THINGS IN MY FANFIC. IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT, SIMPLY IGNORE IT. I WRITE FANFICTION AS A HOBBY, NOT A RESEARCH PAPER. IF YOU DON'T LIKE MARY-SUEISM, PLEASE READ MY FANFIC, RENEGADE INSTEAD. I JUST STARTED WRITING IT A FEW MONTHS AGO. IT'S ABOUT SIRIUS AFTER PRISONER OF AZKABAN WHEN HARRY RECEIVES TROPICAL BIRDS FROM HIM. SORRY FOR THE REALLY LONG AUTHOR'S NOTE, I'M JUST KIND OF SICK OF GETTING REVIEWS TELLING ME TO "DO SOME RESEARCH", LOL. 


	2. Chapter 2

Marauder Mayhem   
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.   
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Stand By Me" by Ben E. King   
  
Chapter 2 - August 2nd  
  
"Oh, God, let's get outta here!" Raven said as she, James, Remus, and Sirius stumbled out of the deserted club.  
  
"Good God! It's two o'clock in the morning. Do you always work this late?" inquired Sirius.  
  
"Afraid so," Raven answered.  
  
"Where are we goin?" he asked.  
  
"My house. C'mon, nobody's there," Raven led them down the street to a cute little white house.  
  
"You live here by yourself?" asked Sirius, staring up at the house.  
  
"Well, Remy and James have been sleeping over every night," answered Raven.  
  
"When can I move in?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Sirius is gonna run away from home," explained James.  
  
"Oh. Well you can move in just as soon as you start paying the rent," said Raven.  
  
"See, there's my problem. If I desert the family, I lose my inheritance," Sirius said.  
  
"That sucks."  
  
"Yeah. So how come you left America?"  
  
"Well, my uncle's a lawyer-"  
  
"He a muggle?" interrupted Sirius.  
  
"No, he's a lawyer for the American Ministry of Magic. He's away a lot, and now I guess he has this big case in Australia. He said he'd be there for at least six months, and I didn't want to go with him, so here I am."  
  
"Cool. So he bought you this house and everything?"  
  
"Yep."  
  
"Nice. So you really don't hafta pay rent?"  
  
"Nope.  
  
"So you know anything about Hogwarts yet?"  
  
"I've already been evaluated and sorted by the Headmaster," answered Raven.  
  
"You in Gryffindor?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"What do you mean evaluated?"  
  
"To see which year to put me in. The American Magic Academy doesn't have the same system as here."  
  
"Well what's the big deal? It goes by age."  
  
"Not in America. Besides, I'm only sixteen, but Dumbledore put me in the seventh year."  
  
"I'm only sixteen," said Sirius.  
  
"Then I bet you'll be seventeen this month," guessed Raven.  
  
"The twenty-sixth, actually. When's your birthday?"  
  
"Why?" asked Raven.  
  
"Cuz I wanna know when I should wrap myself up for you," teased Sirius.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "I think I'll keep it to myself."  
  
"James, when's her birthday?" Sirius turned to James.  
  
"November thirteenth," he answered.  
  
"Traitor," said Raven, eyeing James.  
  
"So, you gonna try out for the Quiddich team?" asked Sirius.  
  
James laughed. "She's already on it."  
  
"What?" Sirius screeched. "Wha'd you do? Sleep with Justin?"  
  
Raven scoffed. "Nah, she just caught the snitch while she was sleeping when we were all playin at my house last month," said James.  
  
"Seeker, huh?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Mmhmm. But I can still kick James' ass at chaser!"  
  
"Hey!" interjected James. "I am way better than you!"  
  
"What? I'll take you anytime, anywhere," Raven said.  
  
James strode over to her and gave her a cold stare. "Bring it on, bitch!" Then he started tickling her.  
  
Remus joined in as Raven giggled and tried to get away. "Oh no you don't!" he said, seizing her around the waist and throwing her onto the couch.  
  
Her head landed on Sirius' lap. "Help me," she pleaded.  
  
"Now I could do that. I can either be your best friend or your worst enemy," taunted Sirius.  
  
"I already have a best friend," Raven answered, between giggles.  
  
"So be it!" Sirius pounced on her, too. They only stopped when she told them she had to pee so bad she could taste it. She came out of the bathroom and sat on the couch in silence.  
  
"Can we just watch a movie or something?" suggested Remus.  
  
"Good idea," agreed James. "What are we watching?"  
  
Then Raven perked up again. "Well, I just bought Stand By Me on DVD."  
  
Sirius, James, and Remus all froze. "What?" Raven demanded.  
  
"That's like our favorite movie in the whole world!" said Sirius.  
  
"Ours, too," said Sirius.  
  
They put in the movie, but James and Remus were soon snoring loudly. Raven looked over at Sirius who was looking at her and they both laughed.  
  
"They do this all the time. I'm usually the only one who stays up until the end of the movie. I just can't stand it; I hafta see the end even though I've seen it a million times already," Sirius said.  
  
"Yep, I'm like that, too. It doesn't matter how tired I am either," Raven agreed.  
  
After the movie was over, Raven and Sirius decided to wake "the two sleeping beauties," as Raven called them, so they could sleep in a real bed.  
  
"There's only two beds, I'll just sleep in your room," said James to Raven.  
  
"Oh, you thing I'm that easy, do you?" Raven asked.  
  
"Or you could just sleep in here," suggested Sirius.  
  
"Hey, I may be easy, but I'm not sleazy!" she teased, looking over at Sirius.  
  
"If you say so," replied Sirius. Raven scoffed. "Well, you can sleep with him and not me?"  
  
"I'm not gonna sleep with him, just next to him," she explained.  
  
"Yeah, maybe you could give him some more pointers of what do to with Lily," chided Sirius.  
  
"Shut it, Padfoot! Night, guys!" said James, leading Raven out of the room and into her own.  
  
The next day:  
  
"Hey, Sirius! Come look at this," Remus called into the hall from Raven's room.  
  
"What?" asked Sirius, coming into the room, rubbing his eyes.  
  
Raven and James were sleeping with their arms around each other. With one quick motion, Remus tore the covers back. Raven made a sound, like she'd woken up, but then rolled over on her back. Then James suddenly rolled over on top of her, still asleep. Sirius and Remus started laughing as Raven opened her eyes, suddenly wide-awake.  
  
"God, not again! Jay, get off me," said Raven, straining to get him off of her. Remus helped her push him off and she sat up, looking over at Sirius and Remus, who were still laughing.  
  
"Well, I'm up!" she said as she hit James.  
  
"Ow! What?" he yelled.  
  
"You did it again," Remus told him.  
  
"Oh my God! I'm sorry, Rave!" he was suddenly wide-awake. "Are you okay? How are your boobs?" James put out a hand to see if they were okay, but Raven caught it.  
  
"Uh, watch it," said Raven, lying back down and pulling up the covers.  
  
"And what do you thing you're doing?" Remus asked.  
  
"Sleeping," Raven said under the blankets.  
  
Remus ripped them away once more. "Uh, no you're not. You're making us coffee."  
  
"I am?" Raven demanded.  
  
"Yes, you are. Raven makes the best coffee in the world."  
  
Raven smiled, slightly at the complement. "God, don't you people sleep?"  
  
"Not at 12:30 in the afternoon!" he said.  
  
Raven sat up. "Oh my God, is that what time it is?"  
  
"Yep," answered Sirius.  
  
Eventually they all got out of bed and Raven did make coffee. "Wow, this is really good!" Sirius complemented.  
  
"Don't sound so surprised," Raven responded.  
  
James and Remus went to get some donuts while Sirius and Raven finished up their coffee.  
  
"So your parents died when you were, what? Ten?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Yeah, ten," said Raven.  
  
"How? I mean. is it okay if I ask?"  
  
"They were killed, actually, by Lord Voldemort."  
  
"Whoa."  
  
"It's okay, it was a long time ago," Raven added, seeing the sympathetic look on Sirius' face.  
  
"Do you have any brothers or sisters?"  
  
"Got an ex-step cousin. if that counts. Josh. He's four years older than me. His mom and my uncle got married when I was fourteen and got divorced before I turned fifteen. They're muggles; I think that's why she divorced my uncle. But I still hafta see Josh sometimes."  
  
"What? You don't like him?"  
  
"Well, he acts like my brother and he's not. He's really overprotective; it's just really annoying."  
  
"But that's how a lot of brothers are."  
  
"Do you have any brothers or sisters?"  
  
"Brother, but he's younger. He wouldn't protect me unless there was something in it for him."  
  
"You don't get along I take it?"  
  
"That's putting it lightly. My parents love him and hate me, so."  
  
"They hate you? Sirius, I'm sure they don't really hate you."  
  
"Yeah, they hate me. You'll see. My whole family hates me because I don't go along with their beliefs," said Sirius, coldly.  
  
"What are their beliefs?"  
  
"That all muggle-borns are unfit to study magic. You hafta be pure blood or you aren't anything."  
  
"Sounds like Voldemort talking."  
  
"Yeah, I'm sure they think he's got the right idea. Anyway, my brother, Regulus, is their little angle, so I decided to be the opposite at Hogwarts. My mum hates getting owls telling her how much of a troublemaker I am."  
  
"So is that why you and James are so close? He's your partner in crime?" asked Raven.  
  
"Right. He understands me."  
  
"You don't seem that hard to understand."  
  
"Wait," said Sirius.  
  
"Troublemaker, huh? Stay away from me then. I like troublemakers; can ya tell?"  
  
"What if I don't wanna say away from you?"  
  
Remus opened the door and James followed with the donuts. They all sat at the kitchen table and ate.  
  
"So, you think maybe after Evans and I get together you guys could double with us?" asked James.  
  
"What?" asked Raven.  
  
"Cuz look at you guys. You're perfect for each other. Raven, you can straighten him out," suggested James.  
  
"Excuse me? I thought you told me to stay away from him!"  
  
"Well, that was just to warn you. I think you can handle him. So what do you say?"  
  
"Prefiero besar la cola de un alce muerto!" Raven stood up and walked into her bedroom.  
  
"What the hell was that?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Spanish," answered James.  
  
"Well, wha'd she say?"  
  
"You don't wanna know, Padfoot."  
  
"Well, I do!" said Remus.  
  
"She said, 'I'd rather kiss a dead moose's butt!'"  
  
Remus burst out laughing. "So, am I the only one not getting any here?"  
  
James and Sirius hit him across the chest. Later that day:  
  
"Gus is letting me have a break, can you believe it?" asked Raven as she made her way over to the three guys in the club.  
  
"No," said Remus and James together.  
  
"Dance?" Sirius held out his hand.  
  
"Sure," Raven said, taking it.  
  
"Since this is your favorite movie," he added. "Stand By Me" by Ben E. King was playing.  
  
"Oh, I didn't even realize. I love this song."  
  
"Me too. Okay, I hafta ask this. Have you and Jay ever. ever."  
  
"Gone out? No. He's been my best friend since forever. We could never be anything more than friends," answered Raven firmly.  
  
"You've never. kissed him?"  
  
"I kiss him all the time. It's a friend thing. I even kiss Remus like that now."  
  
"No, I mean like really kissed him."  
  
"Did he tell you something?"  
  
"No, it's just I asked him and he wouldn't answer me."  
  
Raven sighed. ".Okay, it was right before I left for America. He and his dad came to the airport with me. I gave them both a hug and started walking down the terminal. Then I turned around again, and he blew me a kiss. So I ran back, kissed him, and then got on the plane. It was just like a farewell kiss, I guess. But I still remember it. I'd probably seen it in a movie or something."  
  
"Sounds innocent enough," said Sirius, "or did he slip you the tongue?"  
  
Raven laughed. "No! We were ten!"  
  
"So?"  
  
Raven gave him a look. "So? Were you open mouth kissing girls when you were ten?"  
  
"Well."  
  
"Oh my God!"  
  
"No! No, I don't think so. Unless it was to piss my parents off or something."   
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	3. Chapter 3

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Chapter 3  
  
September 1st  
  
"Jesus, we overslept! Sirius, get up!" James scrambled out of bed and was banging on the wall between Raven's room and the other bedroom, which had become Sirius'.  
  
"Oh shit!" Sirius yelled through the wall.  
  
They were up, dressed, and running toward the door in a matter of minutes. As Sirius flung open the door, Remus was just raising his hand to knock.  
  
"Ready?" he asked, his hand still in the air.  
  
"Course we are! We've been ready for hours. Where ya been, man?" lied Sirius.  
  
"You just got up, didn't you?" Remus guessed.  
  
"No," Sirius lied again.  
  
"Padfoot, you are so fulla shit! C'mon, let's go. We don't wanna miss the train."  
  
"Alright, alright! Raven! James! Let's go!" Sirius yelled into the house.  
  
"We're coming! If you hadn't left all your shit in the hallway maybe I could move a little faster!" bickered Raven.  
  
"If you hadn't insisted that we watch The Count of Monte Cristo again, maybe I could have unpacked some of it last night!" he shouted back at her.  
  
Raven scoffed. "Why did I let you move in with me?"  
  
"Why did I move in with you?"  
  
"Oh yeah, cuz I wanted to get my hands on some of your Uncle Alphard's gold!" she teased.  
  
"It's my gold now! Maybe I'll use some of it to buy you a clue!"  
  
"Ladies, ladies! Enough! You can fight on the train! Let's go!" Remus yelled over them.  
  
"But can't I just take my birthday present to King's Cross?" whined Sirius.  
  
"Yeah, that wouldn't draw a crowd! I can see the headlines now," Raven pretended to read a newspaper. "Flying Motorbike Drops Off Small Brain!"  
  
"Bitch!" Sirius spun around to find them standing in the lawn alone. James, Remus, and Peter had already apparated to King's Cross. They apparated into separate stalls in the ladies' room. Raven stuck her head out of her stall and looked around.  
  
"Coast's clear!" she said.  
  
Sirius opened the door to his stall and walked right into an attractive young muggle girl. She screamed as Sirius turned to glare at Raven. She laughed at him as they came out of the bathroom to find Remus, Peter, and James waiting for them. They ran onto Platform 9 ¾, stowed their luggage, and got onto the train. They found an empty compartment and all sat down.  
  
"Whew. We made it," Moony sighed.  
  
"Just barely," Peter pointed out. "It's eleven o'clock right.now," he said, looking at his watch as the train gave a sudden jolt and was on its way to Hogwarts.  
  
They rode in silence for a little while, listening to the train hum across the tracks. There was a knock on the compartment door and it slid open.  
  
"Raven, you wanna come change with me?" asked red-headed Lily Evans.  
  
"Um, yeah," answered Raven, getting up.  
  
"You can change in here. Really, we don't mind!" said Sirius, raising his eyebrows twice.  
  
"Keep dreamin!" said Raven as she closed the compartment door behind her.  
  
"So, when are you guys gonna go on that date?" James asked Sirius, slyly.  
  
"Give it up, man. You should know by now we're just friends," answered Sirius.  
  
"Yeah. Uh-huh. Right," James gave Sirius a knowing look.  
  
Sirius scoffed and stood up. "I gotta piss," he said as he walked out the door.  
  
"Oh yeah, he wants her," joked Remus.  
  
"Bad," added Peter.  
  
"The question is, does she want him?" asked Remus.  
  
"It's hard to tell with her. With any other girl, it would be obvious, but Rave isn't like that. She flirts with pretty much everyone," said James.  
  
"I don't think she knows she's doing it, though," said Remus.  
  
"No, she doesn't."  
  
"I think eventually something will happen. I mean, they go at it so much it makes ya wonder why they would bother if they didn't like each other," said Peter.  
  
"So, you're saying there's passion in their insults?" summarized Remus.  
  
"Something like that."  
  
Raven and Lily found an empty compartment and changed into their school uniforms. "Ooh, stylish!" joked Raven as she looked at her uniform in the mirror.  
  
"Tell me about it," agreed Lily, "but it could be worse."  
  
"I guess. I gotta go pee. I'll meet you back in the guys' compartment," she said, leaving their compartment and heading down the hallway. She thought she saw Sirius going into the men's room and was just remarking to herself, "Men's room? He wishes," when she ran into someone. She had long blonde hair, and as she turned sharply, Raven realized that she was a he. a quite handsome he, in fact.  
  
"I'm sorry," she said politely.  
  
"Don't be sorry. I rather enjoyed it," he replied smoothly. Raven rolled her eyes and thought to herself, "God, another prick," as he continued speaking. "I don't believe we've met. You must be new. I am Lucius Malfoy, Slytherin."  
  
"Raven McKinnon, Gryffindor," she replied. "Excuse me then, I'll just go find my friends."  
  
"Friends? But I thought we had just become friends," said Malfoy, backing her into an empty compartment. "What do you say we get to know each other a little better in here."  
  
Raven decided to play along with this asshole. "We could do that."  
  
Lucius brought his hand up her thigh and started to kiss her neck. Raven rolled her eyes and tried to ignore the feel of his disgusting breath on her throat. Sirius came out of the bathroom and casually looked into the compartment. Then he froze and took a better look. Raven looked at him and shook her head. Lucius pulled away from her neck and touched his lips to hers, his hand still moving up her leg. Raven had had enough. She brought her knee up sharply, colliding with his groin. Lucius moaned with pain and fell backwards, his hands finding the painful area. Sirius shifted so that he could not be seen and put a hand over his mouth, trying to hold in a laugh.  
  
"You little bitch! You're gonna wish you never did that!" he shouted, getting to his feet and shuffling towards her. He raised his hand and brought it swiftly towards her cheek. Sirius caught his hand.  
  
"I think this conversation is over," he said, still holding Malfoy's hand, tightly.  
  
Lucius jerked his hand away. "We'll see about that." He whipped around and strode out of the compartment.  
  
"Are you okay?" asked Sirius.  
  
"I could have handled him myself," she answered.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes. "I'm sorry I even cared!"  
  
"Thank you," she said, quickly.  
  
"You're welcome. Let's go," he put his arm around her and led her out of the room. "That was Lucius Malfoy, our arch nemesis."  
  
"He told me. Does he always have that bad of breath?"  
  
Sirius laughed. "Yeah." He put his thumb, his pointer, and his middle finger together, brought them to his mouth, and pretended he was taking a drag. They came to their compartment and walked in.  
  
"You aren't gonna believe this," said Sirius to the other guys.  
  
"What?" they all asked in unison.  
  
"Raven just kicked Malfoy in the jewels."  
  
"What?" they each yelled together again.  
  
"Yes, and I hope you enjoyed it, because it will never happen again," said Malfoy's voice from behind them. They all spun around.  
  
"Yay, the whole family's here!" said Sirius, sarcastically. "Raven, let me introduce you. This is Bellatrix, my favorite cousin in the whole world," Sirius pointed to the only girl in the group. She had short black hair and was slightly pretty. "This is my dear brother, Regulus," Sirius pointed to a shorter, black haired boy who, in Raven's opinion, looked less like Sirius than Malfoy. "You're already had the pleasure of meeting Malfoy, and this is Rodolphus Lestrange, and his brother Rabastan." Raven just stared at them all. "She's very pleased to meet you all, I'm sure," Sirius answered for her.  
  
"Sirius, this your new whore?" asked Bellatrix, smirking at him.  
  
"Go to hell!" he answered.  
  
"Thank you very much," she retorted.  
  
"Fuck you very much!" Raven chimed in. "You're the whore," she said, looking at Bellatrix's low-cut top and low-rise black pants.  
  
"Charming. Let's get outta here, Rodolphus," she pulled him away.  
  
"Great idea. You can get the hell out, too, Malfoy," said James, standing up beside Raven.  
  
"Potter, I didn't see you there! Where's your little mudblood friend?" Malfoy asked.  
  
"Don't call her that!" James clenched his fists.  
  
Lucius laughed, despicably. "Oh, poor Potter. Lots of girls in this school may want you, but she's one you'll never have!"  
  
Lily entered the compartment and stared at him. "Well, that's where you're wrong, Lucius," she said as she pulled James closer to her and kissed him.  
  
Malfoy's mouth dropped open. He scoffed and led the rest of his gang out of the compartment.  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	4. Chapter 4

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Chapter 4  
  
"Now that the sorting hat is through, am I right in surmising that you are all very hungry?" Dumbledore paused and waited for everyone to murmur that they were. "Then without further ado, we will begin the-" again the Headmaster paused, only this time, instead of looking at the crowd awaiting a response, he tilted his head and put a hand to his ear as if he were listening to something no one else could hear. "-Ah, yes. I forgot to introduce Ms. McKinnon. Raven, would you stand up, please? Students, this is Raven McKinnon, she's in her seventh year, and she's moved here from America. I'm sure you will all want to welcome her more properly after the opening ceremony. Let's eat." Dumbledore waves his hand and the food for the feast had magically appeared on the table.  
  
"So let me get this straight," said Raven as they all piled their plates. "Gryffindor's the best, obviously, then Ravenclaw, then Hufflepuff, then Slytherin?"  
  
"Basically. Gryffindor's for the brave, Ravenclaw's for the smart, Hufflepuff's for the stupid, and Slytherin's for-"  
  
"The assholes?" guessed Raven, interrupting Sirius.  
  
"Yeah," he answered.  
  
"So, why aren't you in Hufflepuff?" she asked him.  
  
"Blow me," Sirius replied.  
  
"Said the Hufflepuff."  
  
James, Remus, and Peter exchanged all-knowing glances and smiled, listening to Raven and Sirius bicker. For the past month, whenever Sirius and Raven were together, they playfully fought with each other. This is how they had become friends.  
  
"Go to hell," said Sirius.  
  
"I probably will," answered Raven. At this, she and Sirius looked at each other and laughed.  
  
"Yeah, you must be goin to hell, cuz it's gotta be a sin to look that good!" said Sirius, winking at Raven.  
  
"They go from insults to pick-up lines like that," James snapped his fingers, "don't they?"  
  
"So, when does Quiddich start?" Raven asked, overhearing James.  
  
"Just because you gave Justin head doesn't mean you're gonna make the team!" teased Sirius.  
  
"Why not? It worked for you!" she answered.  
  
"Shut up, bitch," retorted Sirius, automatically.  
  
"Okay, could we for two seconds pretend that you have more than a three word vocabulary? 'Shut up, bitch!' That was stunning."  
  
"Jesus, can't you guys just be friends?" yelled James.  
  
"We are friends," both of them said.  
  
"Then act like it!"  
  
Sirius and Raven glanced skeptically at each other.  
  
"Okay, we'll try," said Raven. "She put on a fake smile, looked at Sirius, and said, "Sirius, my dear friend, could you pass the butter?"  
  
"Ah, but Raven, my pet, you didn't say the magic word," Sirius played along, shaking his finger in her face.  
  
"Oh, how dreadfully appalling of me, darling Sirius. Let me try it again. Pass me the goddamn butter, NOW!"  
  
Sirius's eyes widened. Trying not to laugh, he quickly grabbed the butter dish and set it in front of Raven. As Raven picked up her knife, Sirius then seized it out of her hand and dipped it into the butter.  
  
"Here, muffin," he said, taking the dinner roll from her plate, "allow me." Sirius cut the roll in half and buttered it for her.  
  
"Why, Sirius Lee Black! What would I ever do without such a chivalrous companion as yourself?"  
  
"I just don't know, cheesecake. Let me help you eat," he said, stuffing the now buttered roll into Raven's mouth.  
  
James, Peter, and Remus couldn't take it anymore and burst out in a fit of laughter.  
  
"Cheesecake?!" cried Remus.  
  
Justin Wood, who was sitting next to Remus, scanned the table, reached for a dish, and handed a plate full of cherry cheesecake to Remus. "Here ya go, Lupin," he said cheerfully.  
  
"Wha-oh, no I didn't want-thank you, Wood," he stammered. This only made the rest of them laugh more.  
  
"Okay, I take it back. Don't you two ever be nice to each other again!"  
  
They finished their dinner and headed up to Gryffindor Tower. They came to the fat lady and she asked for the password.  
  
"What's the password?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Cornish Pixie," said Justin from behind them.  
  
"Oh, hey Wood!" Raven turned to face him.  
  
"Raven! There's my star Quiddich player! You ready to drop those Slytherin's on their asses?"  
  
"You bet I am, Captain!"  
  
"That's my girl!" said Wood, making his voice sound like he was on the verge of tears and pretending to wipe his eyes. He put his arm around Raven and led her into the portrait hole as it swung open.  
  
"Hey! What about me?" James called after them. "I'm better than she is!"  
  
"No you're not, Potter. You kinda suck, actually," said Wood. Raven smiled and stuck out her tongue at James.  
  
"Alright, that's sexism, right there! Just because she's hotter than me doesn't mean she's better at Quiddich!"  
  
"Is it my fault our Quiddich Captain's a heterosexual?" Raven asked him, innocently. Wood laughed  
  
"Hey, Black," said Wood, clapping Sirius on the back. "You been practicing in Germany?"  
  
"Course I have. I beat up my brother a few times, actually," said Sirius.  
  
"Good! The better you are, the better off we are."  
  
"Thank you-"  
  
"God damn! Now Sirius is better than me? What the hell is this?" cried James.  
  
"Oh, cool off, Potter! I was just kidding about you sucking," said Wood. "You know you're good. We're all good and we're gonna kick some ass. Seriously, guys, it's our time! Our time! I can feel it!" As he was talking, Justin threw his fists in the air above his head.  
  
"Hold that thought until October, okay, Wood?" Raven said, pulling his arms down and laughing.  
  
"Oh, right!"  
  
"I'm going up to bed, okay, guys?" said Lily from behind them.  
  
"Okay. I'll see you in the morning," said James, giving her a kiss.  
  
"Come by my room, okay?" Raven said.  
  
"Alright," said Lily as she went up to the girls' dormitory.  
  
"Don't you guys sleep in the same room?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Not me. I worked it out with Dumbledore so that I could still work at night while I was here. He said I'd hafta get my own room so I didn't disturb the other girls in the middle of the night. Plus, he didn't want everyone doing it, so it's kinda a secret," Raven explained.  
  
"Cool. So, where is it?" asked Sirius.  
  
"No one's supposed to know, but I'm sure they'll find out eventually," Raven led Sirius to a supposedly plain wall next to the fireplace. She tapped the wall three times with her wand and a portrait appeared out of nowhere. It contained the opposite of the Fat Lady. She was blonde and skinny, wearing a yellow dress.  
  
"Oh, Miss Raven! How as your summer?" the portrait asked.  
  
"Short. How was yours?" answered Raven.  
  
"Boring."  
  
"Dumbledore showed me the portrait when I came last month to be sorted and stuff," said Raven.  
  
"Well, here you-oh." she stopped and stared at Sirius for a minute. "Who is this? Your boyfriend?"  
  
Raven laughed. "Boy, yes. Friend, no!" she teased.  
  
"Hey!" interjected Sirius.  
  
Raven laughed again. "Just kidding! No, we're just good friends. Lucy, thes are my friends, Sirius Black, James Potter, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew. There's also a red head named Lily Evans. If it's one of them, you don't have to ask me to let them in, okay? But if it's anyone else, then get my permission first, got it?  
  
"Oh, of course!" she said as her portrait slid up to reveal the doorway to Raven's room.  
  
"Cool," said Sirius, stepping into her room. "So, how do you get to the club?"  
  
"Broom."  
  
"Do we get to come?"  
  
"If you don't get caught," warned Raven. "Dumbledore gave me this portkey, but I thought if I use my broom, you guys could use the portkey. It gets reset every night. I hafta be there like really early to get ready and stuff, so."  
  
"Cool," they all said.  
  
"Well, I'm tired, so I'm gonna go to bed.That is if you guys ever get outta my room," said Raven, raising her voice so all the guys could hear her.  
  
"Oh, sorry, babe. You goin to sleep?" asked James.  
  
"I'd like to, yeah," she said.  
  
"K. Night."  
  
"Night, Rave."  
  
"We'll come get ya in the morning."  
  
"Dream about me," said Sirius, winking at her.  
  
"Yeah, you wish," she replied. A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	5. Chapter 5

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Chapter 5 September 2nd  
  
"You look like a dream," said Sirius as Lucy's portrait lifted and he stepped into the room to find Raven face to face with him.  
  
"Go back to sleep."  
  
"Damn, why do you always have the good comebacks?"  
  
"What are you doing here?" asked Raven, ignoring his last question.  
  
"I came to get you because the other guys aren't ready yet. We had to skip breakfast," answered Sirius.  
  
"Why? It's not like they have a choice of what clothes to wear."  
  
"James is trying to tame his hair."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I think he's in love," said Sirius.  
  
"Oh yeah. They just kissed once and now they're in love?"  
  
"I guess so. But remember? We promised them that if Lily ever gave into James, we would double date with them."  
  
"You promised! I had nothing to do with it!" said Raven.  
  
"It was a bet! I said he'd never get Evans, and he said that if he did, we'd hafta go on a date with them!"  
  
"Try to contain your enthusiasm there, Sirius!"  
  
"Rave, we can't sit through a meal without a war breaking out!"  
  
"I see your point; we'd kill each other," laughed Raven. "So, we just explain it to James. I mean, we're both stupidly stubborn, especially you! There's no way we'd both make it out of the restaurant alive!. Don't they wanna go on a date by themselves?"  
  
"You would think so."  
  
"Why can't they understand that we're just friends?"  
  
"Well, it's because we don't act the same as we do with them. Like, you're best friends with the rest of them, but you don't bite their heads off every chance you get, like you do to me."  
  
"You're an easy target," replied Raven, innocently. "Insults are all we have."  
  
"Speaking of insults, are you ready, yet? You move slower than Lucius Malfoy on a broomstick," teased Sirius.  
  
"Ooh, that was harsh. Okay, let's go." Raven grabbed her Transfiguration books, pushed Sirius out of the way, and stepped out of the portrait hole. Sirius followed behind her.  
  
"Whoa, excuse me, ma'am? You dropped a piece of ass back there; let me get that for you!" said Sirius as he grabbed Raven's ass.  
  
Raven screeched and put her hands on her butt. Then she turned around to find Sirius laughing. She made a motion to slap him across the face, and even though she didn't even touch him, Sirius stumbled backwards and rubbed his cheek.  
  
"Sirius Black! You've been a bad, bad boy. Go to my room!"  
  
They both laughed as they went up the boys' dormitory steps.  
  
"Uh, I don't think you're supposed to be in here," warned Sirius.  
  
"Oh really? What are you gonna do? Spank me?"  
  
"Maybe I will," said Sirius, stepping in front of her and blocking the way.  
  
"Wouldn't be the first time today, would it?" said Raven, shoving Sirius out of her way.  
  
Sirius grabbed her and pulled her back behind him. "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't let you pass."  
  
"Oh, it's okay, they're ready," bluffed Raven, looking around Sirius.  
  
As Sirius looked behind him, Raven ran past him into the dorm. Sirius followed, shaking his head and smiling.  
  
"Good morning, guys!" shouted Raven.  
  
"Morning, Rave!" said James, Remus, and Peter in unison.  
  
"That was smooth," Sirius whispered in her ear as he came up behind her.  
  
"I know," she said, turning to smile at him. She kept on staring at him.  
  
"What are you looking at?" Sirius asked her.  
  
"Oh, sorry. I thought you were good looking for a second there, but I was mistaken!"  
  
"God, I got sucked right into that one," said Sirius, laughing.  
  
"Ya know, James, Lily told me she liked your hair wild like it always is," said Raven.  
  
"Shit! She did?" said James, purposefully messing up his hair.  
  
"No."  
  
"Bitch!"  
  
"Move your ass, James, c'mon! We're gonna be late," said Sirius before Raven could respond to James.  
  
"You two go ahead, then."  
  
"Yeah, we know you wanna be alone, anyway," added Peter.  
  
"Fuck you!" said Raven and Sirius at the same time.  
  
"Just go, you guys," said Remus.  
  
"Do you guys really think there's something going on, or are you just trying to make us mad? Cuz it's really ridiculous, and I'm sick of it," said Raven.  
  
"Well, you do hit on each other a lot," Remus pointed out.  
  
"We're kidding! We thought you guys knew that! How could you possibly think that?" defended Sirius. "C'mon, Rave, let's go. You know I'm just dying to get you alone," he joked as he put his arm around her, leading her out of the room.  
  
"Siri, do you have a Band-Aid? I think I skinned my knee when I fell for you," teased Raven, making sure she was not out of the guys' earshot.  
  
"Wow, Rave, you must be Jamaican, cuz Jamaican me crazy!" responded Sirius, loudly.  
  
Then they lowered their voices. "We gotta do something. I am so sick of them ragging on us all the time."  
  
"Me too," agreed Sirius. "Maybe we should just give em what they want."  
  
"What, act like we're going out?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"You're crazy, Sirius!"  
  
"Crazy for you, baby!"  
  
Raven completely ignored his comment. "They would never buy that."  
  
"They might if we were convincing."  
  
"No way, Sirius! I am not gonna sleep with you just to prove a point to them," she said, firmly.  
  
"I wasn't asking you to!" said Sirius, suspiciously, as Raven gave him a questionable look. ".Okay, okay, maybe I was. But we hafta do something good to get them back."  
  
"Well, we don't have time to think of anything right now," said Raven as they came to the Transfiguration classroom. Sirius and Raven found an empty table and sat down.  
  
"Morning," said Lily as she sat down next to Raven.  
  
"Hey, where were you this morning?" asked Raven.  
  
"Oh, I skipped breakfast; I just couldn't get my hair to look right."  
  
"Really?" asked Raven, glancing at Sirius out of the corner of her eye and suppressing a laugh. "That's funny; neither could James."  
  
"Speak of the devil," said Sirius as James, Remus, and Peter sat down at their table.  
  
"Good morning, ladies!" said James, beaming.  
  
"Morning," said Raven, Lily, and Sirius together. Raven snorted. Apparently Sirius hadn't realized James had said 'ladies.'  
  
"Nice hair, Jay," Sirius smirked. James had evidently given up on trying to tame it. In some places it was still plastered down with gel, but in the back mostly it was sticking straight up like it usually did.  
  
"Thanks, pal!"  
  
"Quiet down, class!" It was Professor Minerva McGonagall yelling over the students. "We are going to split into pairs so that you can practice turning these porcupines into hair brushes," she explained.  
  
James got paired with Peter, Remus with some Slytherin girl, Sirius with Lily, and Raven got paired with Wood. While Wood was working on his porcupine, a note dropped into Raven's lap. She opened it and it said:  
  
I have an idea. We go on the date that you know Lily and James are gonna make us go on with them and then we just play it out like we like each other after that. What do you think?  
  
Sirius  
  
Raven turned the parchment over and wrote on the back. Then she folded it into a paper airplane and sent it back to him using the Levitation charm. Sirius opened it and read:  
  
I don't see your point. What would that prove?  
  
Raven  
  
Sirius wrote his response on another piece of parchment and sent it back:  
  
I don't know what it would prove! But it would just serve them right when they find out that we're not really going out, wouldn't it? C'mon, Rave! It's the perfect scam and I'm offering you a chance to be a part of it.  
  
Sirius  
  
Raven wrote back:  
  
Oh, you're offering me a chance to be a part of it, are you? Yeah right! I'd like to see you go out with yourself! Okay, even if by some small chance I would agree to this, there's one thing you need to understand. you're not getting any perks!  
  
Raven  
  
Sirius replied:  
  
Oh, come on!!! None whatsoever? You know you want me.....  
  
Sirius  
  
The note went back to Sirius:  
  
"Am I that transparent? I want you. I need you! Oh baby, oh baby!"  
  
Rave  
  
Sirius wrote back:  
  
God, you're such a tease! That was from 10 Things I Hate About You.  
  
Sirius  
  
As soon as the airplane dropped back into Raven's lap, Professor McGonagall's voice echoed through the room. "I'm sure we're all enormously impressed with your use of the Levitation charm, Mr. Black, but this is Transfiguration in case you haven't noticed. It won't happen again." Her last sentence was not a question, it was a statement, and Sirius wasn't sure if it required an answer. "Unless you want a detention?"  
  
"Of course not, Professor," replied Sirius, meekly, stealing a glance at Raven, who was trying not to laugh.  
  
"Detention. My office, 9 P.M."  
  
"It's a date," said Sirius, sarcastically, under his breath.  
  
"Ms. McKinnon? Would you be wanting one also? Then maybe you'd have time to finish your conversation with Black."  
  
"It wasn't her fault, Professor," said Sirius, before Raven could answer. "She had nothing to do with it. I was the one that sent her the note, and she ignored it."  
  
"Very well."  
  
With that, the bell rang and Transfiguration was over. A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE, REVIEW! 


	6. Chapter 6

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Chapter 6  
  
At dinner that night, Lily and James were all smiles. Sitting across from each other, neither one of them was paying any attention to the food on their plates.  
  
"Hey, Sirius are you free on Wednesday night?" asked James.  
  
"What are you talking about? Of course I'm free; I'll be here. Unless I get another detention," he added as an afterthought.  
  
"You didn't have to do that, you know. I've had lots of detentions; I can handle it," said Raven to Sirius.  
  
"I know you can, but I was the one who started it," said Sirius.  
  
James cleared his throat. "Me and Lily were gonna go have dinner in Hogsmeade. You guys wanna come?"  
  
"When did this happen?" Raven turned to Lily.  
  
Lily blushed. "Right after Potions."  
  
"No, but thanks anyway," said Sirius, answering James's question.  
  
"Well, you don't really have a choice, remember? You promised you'd double with us," said James, slyly.  
  
"We never said that! I'm not going on a date with this animal!" yelled Raven, gesturing toward Sirius.  
  
"Wait a minute here, woman! Who are you callin an animal?" replied Sirius.  
  
"I am not your woman, Sirius! Don't even start!"  
  
"Baby, you should be thankin me! I just saved your ass from detention!"  
  
"Jesus Christ! I'm about ready to go up to that head table and tell McGonagall to give me the detention so I don't hafta hear about it for the rest of my life! Don't you guys see?" she said, turning to James and Lily. "This is what it's gonna be like on your date. Why would you want us to come? We'd bite each other's heads off before we even go the appetizer!"  
  
"Because we think there's-how did you put it, Remus?-passion in your insults," James finished.  
  
"Leave me outta this," said Remus between mouthfuls of food.  
  
"Tell you what - you guys go on one date and we'll stop bugging you about liking each other forever," stated James, convincingly.  
  
Sirius and Raven looked at each other and shrugged. "Promise?" they said.  
  
"Promise."  
  
They finished dinner and headed up to the common room. At 9 o'clock, Sirius made his way down to Professor McGonagall's office, and at 11 o'clock the common room was completely empty. Sirius entered the commons and opened Lucy's portrait.  
  
"So what's the plan?" he said to Raven, who was curled up on her bed like a cat, watching the rainfall on the window.  
  
At the sound of his voice, she sprang up and rolled over on her stomach, pushing herself up with her arms. "What the hell are you doing in here, Sirius? They're gonna know something's up!"  
  
"Relax. I had detention, remember?"  
  
"Okay, I've been thinking about it, and you're gonna hafta kiss me."  
  
Sirius raised his eyebrows and put his hand to Raven's forehead. "Are you feelin okay?"  
  
"No, I feel sick to my stomach, believe me, but it's the only way it's gonna work. They won't believe it if we don't do it. We can't resort to pick-up lines alone because we do that all the time."  
  
"Yeah, you're right. So, what, I walk you to the door and kiss you, just like that?"  
  
"I guess so. Make sure Lily and James are watching, though."  
  
"You're not gonna hit me, are you?" asked Sirius, cringing.  
  
"No, but I'm glad you brought that up, cuz I swear to God, Sirius, if you stick your tongue in my mouth, I will bite it off!"  
  
"Shit, maybe I better not kiss you."  
  
"Why? Can't you control your own tongue?"  
  
"Sometimes it has a mind of its own," answered Sirius, matter-of-factly.  
  
"Okay, maybe we should just forget the whole thing," said Raven, quickly.  
  
"No, no, no! I promise I'll keep it under control."  
  
"You better! Control it, or lose it!"  
  
"So how are we gonna lead up to it?"  
  
"I don't care. Just do it."  
  
"Ooh, aggressive, aren't you?"  
  
"Don't!"  
  
"Don't what?"  
  
"I got it!" she yelled. "We'll get into a fight. You know how James said they think there's passion in our insults? Well, we'll give it to em!"  
  
"Don't follow."  
  
"Sirius, use your brain! Ya know, that's that big lump three feet above your ass? We start fighting and calling each other names, and in the middle of it, you kiss me. Do you get it? It'll make them think they were right the whole time."  
  
"What are we gonna fight about?"  
  
"Oh, Lord! Sirius, we fight all the time! How hard can it be to pick a fight with me?"  
  
"Good point. Are you sure you don't want any tongue?" joked Sirius, winking at her.  
  
"I'm positive, now get the hell out!" said Raven, pushing him towards the door.  
  
"Okay, okay!" Sirius stepped out of the portrait hole.  
  
"Goodnight. Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs-" the portrait slammed down in his face, ".bite." Sirius sighed and wandered up to the boys' dormitories. A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE, REVIEW! 


	7. Chapter 7

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Chapter 7 September 4th  
  
James and Lily were hand in hand, walking out of the front doors and onto Hogwarts grounds. Raven and Sirius were dragging their feet behind them.  
  
"I figure we can use that portkey Dumbledore gave Raven to get to the club. Then we can just walk to the restaurant from the club," said James.  
  
"Great," said Sirius and Raven unenthusiastically.  
  
"C'mon, guys, it'll be fun," encouraged Lily.  
  
"I can't believe you're taking his side, Lil! You just warmed up to him like a weak ago!" said Raven.  
  
"Just come on, you two," said James,  
  
Standing outside the door to Raven's club, they continued walking into a restaurant called Magical Meals & More and sat down at a table for four.  
  
"What, guys? No pick-up lines tonight? The one night it would actually be appropriate?" asked James.  
  
"Sorry, I just feel so uninspired," said Sirius blankly.  
  
They ordered their food and James and Lily started chatting away while Sirius and Raven sat there looking at each other and occasionally rolling their eyes.  
  
"You look nice," complemented Sirius, sincerely. She did look incredible. She was wearing a cute black top and dark red pants. And Sirius, of course, always wore black if he had a choice.  
  
"Thanks," said Raven. "So do you."  
  
"So, tell me about this Snape guy," said Raven.  
  
"Snivellus?" asked Sirius, distastefully. "How'd you find out about him?"  
  
"Met him yesterday. I dropped my books and he helped me pick them up.while looking down my shirt!"  
  
"That little dick! I'll kick his ass!" yelled Sirius.  
  
Raven gave him one of her looks. "You would have done the same thing."  
  
Sirius opened his mouth to object and then closed it again. He nodded, "Yeah, I would have. So he was actually nice to you?"  
  
"Well yeah, but really weird. I was telling Justin about my parents being killed and everything and he was kind of muttering to himself. I heard him say 'Like a girl that beautiful could be anything but pureblood,' it was weird, though. He was like talking to himself."  
  
"Well, he doesn't have anyone else to talk to. Everyone hates him except the Slytherins. He's the biggest brown noser in the whole world!"  
  
"Really?" asked Raven, becoming interested.  
  
"Oh yeah, he's got his head so far up Professor Sprout's ass, it's hard to tell where he ends and she begins!"  
  
Raven howled with laughter, making Lily and James watch them.  
  
"Rave, wanna come to the bathroom with me?" asked Lily, suddenly.  
  
"Not really, no."  
  
"C'mon, I hafta go!" Lily said.  
  
"But I don't hafta go."  
  
"Just come on!" growled Lily, pulling Raven up from her chair and leading her to the bathroom.  
  
"What is going on?" Raven asked.  
  
"I just wanted to talk to you," said Lily innocently.  
  
"About what?"  
  
"Tell me you don't think he's hot!"  
  
"What? James always looks-"  
  
"No, Rave, not James. I'm talking about Sirius!"  
  
"I thought you liked James. Ya know, if you want Sirius, you can have him. You don't hafta ask me!"  
  
"Raven! I don't want Sirius! I was asking if you thought he looked hot."  
  
"He looks the same as he always does."  
  
"Oh, you are such a liar! I can tell when you're lying, ya know."  
  
"I didn't say I don't think he's hot, but he doesn't look an extra hot tonight."  
  
"So you do think he's hot!" shouted Lily, triumphantly.  
  
"Just because I think he's hot doesn't mean I wanna go out with him!"  
  
"Yes, it does!"  
  
"No, it really doesn't. I think James is hot, too. Maybe I'll ask him out."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Oh, you don't want me to?"  
  
"Well.no."  
  
"I didn't think so. I think I made my point. Is this conversation over yet?" Raven asked, impatiently.  
  
"Okay, fine," Lily sighed.  
  
Apparently this was the plan that Lily and James had worked out together. Back at the table, James was asking Sirius the exact same thing.  
  
"Sirius, why can't you just admit you think she's beautiful?"  
  
"I can admit that. Even she knows I think she's beautiful. That doesn't mean I like her as anything more than a friend."  
  
"Yes, it does!"  
  
"No, it doesn't, James. Don't you think she's beautiful?"  
  
"You know I do."  
  
"Then why don't you like her?"  
  
"I do like her. In fact, I love her."  
  
"Like a friend, though, right?"  
  
"Like a sister," corrected James.  
  
"Whatever. Now, why can't it just be like that with me?"  
  
"Because it's different with her. I've seen how you look at her; if you don't like her, you're crazy."  
  
"You're crazy, ya know that?"  
  
"I agree," said Raven as she sat back down next to him.  
  
Lily and James looked at each other and shook their heads. They finished dinner and headed back to the club where they had left the portkey. Raven ran inside quickly to talk to Gus and then came back out.  
  
"Gus is letting me start again tomorrow. I took a break for a few days cuz I wanted to get ready for school and stuff."  
  
"So we get to come?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Sure, why not?"  
  
A girl with short blonde hair walked out of the club and noticed Sirius. "Well, what are you doing here?"  
  
"I work here, Drusilla. remember?" answered Raven.  
  
"I was talking to him," she pointed distastefully at Sirius.  
  
Raven turned to look at him and rose her eyebrows. "Oh really? Does he owe you an apology?"  
  
"Damn right, he does!" she exclaimed.  
  
Sirius looked worried. "Uh, I'm sorry I didn't call you. It's just that I uh. I uh, fell in love!" stammered Sirius. He quickly ran over to Raven and linked arms with her.  
  
Raven jumped back. "Oh no ya don't! Leave me outta this! He's kidding, Dru, really!"  
  
"Well, Sirius Black, just to make things clear, I don't ever wanna see you again," she said, flipping her hair over her shoulder and stalking off down the street.  
  
"Well, that wasn't too bad," said Sirius, breathing a sigh of relief as they gathered around the portkey and were suddenly back in the castle. "You could have helped me out there, Raven!"  
  
Raven scoffed. "I'm not gonna lie for you. I'm sure you deserved it."  
  
"Yeah, but I thought you were my friend. You could have at least backed me up!" he yelled at her.  
  
"You thought I was your friend? I let you move into my house no questions asked when you decided to run away from home! I gave you a frickin flying motorcycle and an autographed Smashing Pumpkins CD, you're favorite band of all time, for your birthday and you THINK we're friends?-"  
  
"Actually, I thought the bike was from all of you," he said, meekly.  
  
"God, you always hafta disagree with whatever I say! You know, I really hate you sometimes!" she yelled, bringing her face up to his.  
  
"I hate you more!" he shouted back, and before Raven could utter her next attack, Sirius's lips were on hers. After a few seconds, Sirius pulled away. The two of them stared at each other for a minute and then slowly turned to look at James and Lily. Lily's mouth was half open, but James's dropped almost to the floor, and his eyes were bugged out of his head. He mouthed wordlessly at them before he could speak.  
  
"Uh, well, goodnight then," he said, taking Lily's hand and pulling her away from them.  
  
"Um, yeah, night," muttered Lily.  
  
And without a backward glance, they hurried up to their dormitories, completely clueless as to whether they had really convinced Sirius and Raven that they liked each other, or if they had figured it out on their own. Lucy's portrait opened and Raven and Sirius went in.  
  
"'Just good friends' my ass!" they heard a voice say.  
  
Raven whipped back around, "Lucy!"  
  
"Oh! Sorry, Miss Raven!" said Lucy, quickly.  
  
Sirius and Raven burst into laughter as the portrait slid down. "Well, it looks like they bought it," he said.  
  
"Ya think?" said Raven, sarcastically, falling onto her bed and pulling up the covers. "Get outta my room!"  
  
"You just love throwin me out, don't you?"  
  
"Yep. Out!"  
  
"Where do want me to go?"  
  
"Go sleep in the commons."  
  
"And what if someone comes down there in the middle of the night?"  
  
"Tell em the truth: I threw you out."  
  
"And then all we worked for goes to shit?" Sirius sat on the bed next to her.  
  
Raven sighed. "Fine, you can sleep in here. But remember how I said I'd bite off your tongue?"  
  
"Uh, yeah."  
  
"Same goes for Sirius Jr. if he comes anywhere near me, got it?"  
  
Sirius swallowed hard. "Got it," he said. "You really think I'd try that with you?"  
  
"Would you?"  
  
"Don't flatter yourself, McKinnon."  
  
"Good." Raven got up from the bed and started pacing the room.  
  
"So, wha'd Lily say in the bathroom?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Oh, she asked me if I thought you looked hot tonight," said Raven casually.  
  
".And?"  
  
"And I told her even if I do think you're hot, it doesn't mean I like you."  
  
"You think I'm hot?" asked Sirius, standing back up.  
  
"No!" Raven stopped in front of him.  
  
"No, huh?" he asked, sounding very affronted.  
  
"Well, maybe."  
  
"Maybe?" Sirius grinned, suggestively, taking a step towards her.  
  
Raven took a step towards him and brought her face right up to his. "No!" she said, pushing him back down on her bed and turning from him.  
  
"That was cruel," Sirius said.  
  
"Oh, you're hot and you know it."  
  
"Really?" Sirius stood up again.  
  
"But that doesn't mean that I-"  
  
Sirius grabbed her arm and spun her around to face him again. "-Thank you."  
  
"Your welcome."  
  
"James asked me the same thing, ya know."  
  
"Must have been their game plan."  
  
"Yeah, he's like, 'Why can't you admit that she's beautiful?' and I said the same thing you did. I know you are, but that doesn't mean I like you, blah, blah, blah."  
  
"Right."  
  
"But it's like, how can he expect me to deny it? I'm the one who hit on you when I first saw you at the club and didn't know who you were!"  
  
"Oh my God, I had forgotten all about that!" laughed Raven.  
  
"Oh, I thought of a better line now."  
  
"Yeah? Lay it on me."  
  
Sirius smiled, "I think I'm in heaven cuz you look like an angel. Can you take off your shirt so I can check for wings?"  
  
Raven opened her mouth to say something, but she couldn't get it out before laughing. "Bloody hell! That was terrible! That is why you're not gettin laid tonight!"  
  
"Wait, I can come up with a better one!. Uh, I lost my virginity, can I have yours?"  
  
"Too late."  
  
"Dammit!" A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE, REVIEW! 


	8. Chapter 8

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Hungry Eyes" from Dirty Dancing and "I'm A Slave 4 U" by you know who. well, not HIM, but Britney Spears, anyway. Sorry, someone dared me to put a Britney Spears song in my fanfic, and I never back down on a dare! Chapter 8 September 5th  
  
Evidently Lily and James had run straight up to the boys' dorms and told Remus and Peter about Raven and Sirius's little kiss. When Raven and Sirius stepped out of Lucy's portrait, they were all waiting for them. They walked in silence to the Great Hall for breakfast and sat down at the Gryffindor table.  
  
"So, are you guys like a couple now?" Remus broke the silence.  
  
Raven and Sirius looked at each other and then shrugged.  
  
Peter tapped Remus on the shoulder and whispered, "What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"I have no idea," he replied.  
  
The rest of the day was pretty much the same; Raven and Sirius trying to act normal while the rest of the gang were trying to get some answers. After dinner, they all went up to their rooms to get ready to leave for the club. Raven had already left on her broomstick, so the rest went to find the portkey. At the club, Raven and the rest of the dancers were already on stage doing their opening number. Raven had made up the choreography so that there was a guy for each girl and they danced together doing some of her dance moves. After the song, Raven came over to say hi to the gang.  
  
"That's the new dance you had to teach them?" Sirius asked  
  
"Yeah. I made it up myself. Did you like it?"  
  
"Who the hell was that guy?"  
  
"What guy?" Raven asked, puzzled.  
  
"Uh, the guy you were dancin all over!"  
  
"What? That's Xan. He's one of my dancers."  
  
"Well, what the hell was goin on?"  
  
"Sirius, what are you talking about? We were just dancing."  
  
"You don't dance with me like that."  
  
"That's because you never ask me to dance!"  
  
"Maybe I would if I knew you were gonna do that!"  
  
Raven scoffed. "Okay, if you're gonna be with me, you're gonna hafta accept that this is what I do. I like choreographing dance moves along with the music. It looks better on stage if you act out the lyrics. There's nothing going on between me and Alexander or any of the other dancers. I'm not gonna stop dancing just because you get jealous. If you wanna learn the hard way, you can learn the hard way, like James did.  
  
"Oh shit!" said James.  
  
"What's the hard way?" Sirius asked.  
  
"It's... It's-it's harder than the easy way, okay?"  
  
"Bring it on," Sirius replied.  
  
Raven smiled, deviously, "You asked for it."  
  
She walked to the back of the club and told the DJ to turn the treble down so she could sing it herself. "I'm A Slave 4 U" started and Raven sang, "I know I may be young, but I've got feelings, too. And I need to do what I feel like doin. So, let me go, and just listen. All you people look at me like I'm a little girl. Well, did you ever think it'd be okay for me to step into this world. Always sayin 'Little girl, don't step into the club.' Well, I'm just tryin to find out why cuz dancin's what I love. I know I may come off quiet; I may come off shy. But I feel like talkin, feel like dancin when I see this guy. What's practical is logical. What the hell, who cares? All I know is I'm so happy when you're dancin there. I'm a slave for you. I cannot hold it. I cannot control it. I'm a slave for you. I won't deny it. I'm not tryin to hide it, baby..." The song ended with a stare down between Sirius and Raven. Then, Sirius quickly pulled Raven towards him and kissed her... with tongue. Raven gave in for a few seconds, but then got her senses back. She carefully pushed Sirius away, remembering not to ruin their scam.  
  
"Does this mean you liked the song?" said Raven, forcing a pretty convincing, yet fake smile.  
  
"Loved it," replied Sirius flashing a what-are-you-gonna-do-about-it-in- front-of-everyone-else smirk at her.  
  
Raven took his hand and led him into the dressing rooms. When she was sure they were out of earshot, she slammed Sirius hard against the door, closing it, her blue eyes turning to ice.  
  
"Ah! What the fuck?!" he yelled.  
  
"Uh, no Sirius, that would be my line. Why the hell did you do that?" she growled.  
  
"I-I don't know! Because I'm a guy!" stuttered Sirius, surprised by her rage.  
  
"Oh, that better not have been an attempt at humor, because this is not a funny situation, especially for you. I thought we agreed that we kissed once. First of all, that was our second, completely unnecessary kiss, and secondly, your fucking tongue was in my mouth!"  
  
"I just love how you used perfect English when you're angry."  
  
"Don't! Don't you dare try that now! I'm this close to giving you a new vocabulary."  
  
"Okay, okay. Calm down, Rave. Jesus, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were gonna go this ballistic, believe me."  
  
With that, Raven's fury softened. "I guess I am overreacting a little bit. I mean, it was just a kiss. I'm sure you just thought it would help our scam, and I-"  
  
"-That's not why I kissed you, though. I kissed you because I wanted to," said Sirius smoothly.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes and let out a laugh. "You're such a player!"  
  
Sirius smiled, "But, baby, I don't wanna be a playa no more."  
  
"Yeah, you're not a playa, you just crush a lot."  
  
"You know it, crush on you. I know you liked that kiss."  
  
Raven looked up at Sirius and smiled. "Sirius, this may not be the best time to tell you this, but-"  
  
"Don't worry, beautiful. You can tell me."  
  
Raven laughed. "Okay... I wanna break up."  
  
"What?! We can't break up!"  
  
"Oh yes we can!"  
  
"Come on, Raven, we just made out in front of 'em, and now we're gonna break up? I don't think so."  
  
Raven sighed, knowing Sirius was right. "Fine, but we're breaking up tomorrow."  
  
"If that's what you really want," coaxed Sirius.  
  
"Oh, it is! And by the way, if you even try to kiss me one more time, I swear to God, Sirius, your tongue isn't all you're gonna lose."  
  
"Shit!"  
  
After Sirius and Raven had rejoined their friends, "Hungry Eyes" came on.  
  
"Hey, Rave, it's the Dirty Dancing song!" said James, winking at her. "She loves that movie."  
  
"Mm-hmm. Patrick Swayze was my first love," she agreed.  
  
"Well then we gotta dance," Sirius said, pulling her onto the dance floor.  
  
Raven and Sirius started slow dancing. "I've been meaning to tell you. I've got this feeling that won't subside. I look at you and I fantasize you're mine tonight. Now I've got you in my sights, with these, hungry eyes." When the chorus began, Sirius spun Raven around and started the steps they do in Dirty Dancing. Raven knew the steps, too and they kept going, just like in the movie. "One look at you and I can't disguise I've got, hungry eyes. Now did I take you by surprise." After the chorus was over, they returned to dancing normally.  
  
"Holy shit, Sirius! You know these moves? Where the hell did you learn this?" Raven exclaimed.  
  
"One of my first girlfriends loved Dirty Dancing, too. So, I learned the moves to surprise her on her birthday."  
  
"You?" Raven asked. "But that's so sweet!"  
  
"Uh, not sweet. She broke up with me two days before her birthday."  
  
Raven gasped. "Really? That could be the saddest thing I've ever heard!"  
  
"Yeah, no kidding. But, I'm over it."  
  
Raven all of a sudden started cracking up.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Sometimes I just think things that are funny," she replied.  
  
"Well, tell me!"  
  
"She broke up with you before this song, and I'm breaking up with you tomorrow!"  
  
Sirius laughed. "I know, you're such a bitch!"  
  
"This wouldn't be some ploy to keep me from dumping you, would it?"  
  
"...Maybe," Sirius teased.  
  
"Well, you'd better be careful. A girl could get used to this. I'm gonna be callin you Johnny now!"  
  
"As long as you let me call you Baby, baby."  
  
The song continued, "I wanna hold you so hear me out. I wanna show you what love's all about. Darlin, tonight. Now I've got you in my sights with these, hungry eyes. One look at you and I can't disguise I've got, hungry eyes. Now did I take you by surprise. I need you to see: this love was meant to be..."  
  
After a night of dancing and having fun, everyone was beat on their way back up to Gryffindor Tower. Raven, of course, could just fly right into her bedroom window, but the rest of them had to walk all the way across Hogwarts grounds, through the castle and up all those stairs to get back to safety. Granted, they had James' and Raven's invisibility cloaks, but it was still hard to tuck all body parts safely underneath. Dumbledore had said that James, Peter, and Remus could go to watch Raven but he never said anything about Lily and Sirius. When they got to their common room, it was empty.  
  
"I'm gonna go say goodnight to Rave," said Sirius.  
  
"Okay. Tell her she did a wonderful job tonight."  
  
"I will."  
  
The rest of the gang went up to their dormitories and Sirius went to Raven's room. The portrait opened for him, and he stepped in, but Raven was nowhere to be seen.  
  
"Rave?"  
  
"Yeah?" came her voice.  
  
"Where are you?"  
  
"Right here," she said, walking into the room with her hair wet, and a towel around her body.  
  
Sirius stared at her. "Uh, are you trying to get me hot?"  
  
"What? You've seen me a lot more naked than this."  
  
"Yeah, and I liked it."  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "Okay... Keep your pants on; I'm getting dressed."  
  
"So, how are we gonna break up tomorrow?"  
  
"I dunno, but the way James is looking at us every time we're together is starting to scare me. We better break up before they make us get married or something."  
  
"Good idea! Okay, so we'll just get in a fight or something again?"  
  
"Works for me."  
  
"Great. Well, I'm goin to bed," he said, as he headed for the door.  
  
"Oh, by the way, Sirius..."  
  
He turned back around, "Yeah?"  
  
"If I was tryin to make you hot you'd know it, alright?"  
  
Sirius smiled, "Alrighty. Hey, Rave?"  
  
"What?" Raven spun around in her chair.  
  
"How about a goodnight kiss?"  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"Well, ya know, we're breaking up tomorrow. We might not get another chance," said Sirius, walking back over to her.  
  
Raven thought for a minute. "I suppose."  
  
Sirius bent down and lightly kissed her one more time.  
  
"You're either very smart or very chicken," she said because he hadn't tried to make it anything more.  
  
"Why can't I be both?" he said as he stepped out of her room. A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE, REVIEW! 


	9. Chapter 9

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Lie To Me" by Jonny Lang.my favorite! and "Not The One" by The Donnas. Chapter 9 September 6th  
  
"Sirius, baby, is it really you?"  
  
Sirius whipped around. "Eve? What the hell do you want?" he said shortly to the blond-haired girl wearing Slytherin robes.  
  
"Just to have some fun," said Eve, eyeing him, suggestively. "I really miss being with you."  
  
"With me? Things change, Eve," Sirius replied, uneasily, removing her hand from his face.  
  
"What are you saying, Sirius?"  
  
"I'm saying I've forgotten all about you," said Sirius, matter-of-factly.  
  
"Oh really?" she said, lifting her eyebrows. "Did you forget this?" she said, putting her lips on his.  
  
Sirius pushed her away, only to find Raven standing a few feet from them. Her mouth was open and she was shaking her head, trying to speak. She suddenly turned and started to run back up the staircase they were standing in the middle of.  
  
"Rave! Wait!" said Sirius, bounding after her and leaving Eve to stare after them. "It's not what you think! She just-"  
  
Raven had ordered Lucy to slam the portrait down in Sirius' face. "Raven, please! Listen to me, I went out with her last year. I broke up with her two weeks before school was out for the summer, I swear to God!"  
  
Suddenly, Jonny Lang's "Lie to Me" came on from inside Raven's room. ("Lie to me, and tell me everything is alright. Lie to me, and tell me that you're stayin the night. Tell me that you'll never leave. Oh, I'm just tryin to make believe that everything your tellin me is true. C'mon, baby, won't you just lie to me. Go ahead, lie to me..." ) She turned her CD player up really loud to drown out Sirius as he was trying to explain. She didn't want to hear it. She thought maybe the words of the song would get her point across better than listening to his "lies."  
  
"Sirius? What's going on?" James and Lily had come down the stairs and noticed him outside Raven's room.  
  
Sirius ignored them and tried to yell over the music. "She doesn't mean anything to me! She just started kissing me, I don't even know how it happened. You hafta believe me! I..." Sirius trailed off, too tired from yelling and running up the stairs, and sank down to the floor.  
  
"What happened, Sirius?" Lily and James asked in unison.  
  
Sirius told them everything with "Lie to Me" still playing in the background.  
  
"Let's just go downstairs and leave her alone." Eventually, James got Sirius to go down to the Great Hall and eat breakfast. "Okay, now when she comes down, no one say anything about what happened. Sirius, just don't say anything to her, okay? You're only gonna make things worse right now."  
  
"I didn't mean to kiss her. She just grabbed me, okay?" Sirius had his face lying on the table.  
  
"I know, but that doesn't matter to her right now. She saw you kissing another girl. Just trust me on this. I've known her my whole life."  
  
"Shut up, here she comes," said Remus.  
  
As Raven came into the Great Hall, Sirius raised his head from the table. She did not look over at them as she continued walking all the way up to the head table that ran perpendicular to the house tables. She spoke to Dumbledore for a few minutes and then turned and walked back down the row. As she walked by him, Sirius asked her if she wanted any bacon. Turning to look back at him, she gave him an icy stare, then continued to walk out of the Great Hall. No one saw her the rest of the day. At dinner they were all a little curious as to where she was.  
  
"Where the hell is she? This is killing me!" said Sirius, with his head in his hands.  
  
"Does she work tonight?" asked Peter.  
  
"Yeah," said James.  
  
"Well, we can definitely find her there. She always says dancing takes her mind off things," said Lily.  
  
At ten o'clock, they wandered into the Forbidden Forest to find the portkey that would take them to the club. They saw no sign of Raven when they entered the club.  
  
"Hey Xander, is Raven here?" James asked.  
  
"Oh yeah, she's here. Been here all day long," Alexander answered.  
  
"What for?" Sirius inquired.  
  
"Practicing. Said she needed to run through a new song for tonight. Taught it to the band and everything a few hours ago."  
  
"Thanks Jer," said James as Jeremiah continued backstage. "Sirius, you're in trouble," he added.  
  
"Wonderful. Like my day could get any worse. I'm gonna kill that bitch!"  
  
"Whoa, Sirius! You're talking about my best friend here!" said James, defensively.  
  
"No, I'm not. I meant Eve, the girl she saw me kissing."  
  
Three guys then came onto the stage and started plugging in instruments and testing the mikes. They began the song Raven had taught them earlier that day when Raven came out of the dressing room and met eyes with Sirius.  
  
"Oh good, you're here. I didn't want you to miss your song," her smile was almost angelic.  
  
"You know I wouldn't miss it for the world," he said.  
  
Raven took the stage and began singing her song and also playing her guitar. "Our first date was our last date. You're the kinda guy that I love to hate. Now I don't want your eggs or bacon. And when I kissed you I was fakin. I gotta let you know that you hafta let me go. I thought you were the one, but, baby, you're no fun, and you're not the one. Not the one! Now, I don't wanna take you out anymore. I got your number, there's the door. There's somethin missin in your head. And I got no room for you in my bed. I gotta let you know that you hafta let me go. I thought you were the one, but, baby, you're no fun, and you're not the one. Not the one!" The song ended, and Raven went backstage. Sirius sighed and followed her.  
  
"Can you just let me explain, please?" begged Sirius, taking hold of Raven and spinning her around to face him.  
  
"You don't have to, really," she answered him, nonchalantly.  
  
"Yeah, Rave, I do. I broke up with her before I left this summer. Apparently, she found me this morning and started putting moves on me again. I told her it was over, but she just started kissing me. I swear to God I didn't enjoy it."  
  
"Sirius, I don't care if you enjoyed it... it was brilliant! How did you think of-"  
  
"-But I didn't even know what was going on until... What?"  
  
"Well, the scam, it was-"  
  
"Fuck the scam! This is about the scam?" Sirius was very confused. "I thought it was real! I thought you really thought I was cheating on you. It looked real to me!"  
  
"Of course it wasn't real," said Raven, weakly. "I just figured you thought it all up for the breakup."  
  
"Okay. You really scared me, ya know? I mean, we fight all the time, but we've always just been joking. I thought I really messed up."  
  
"You didn't do anything, unless you really wanted to kiss that girl."  
  
"I told you I didn't."  
  
"Not that it matters," said Raven, quickly.  
  
"Yeah, but it did matter to me. I mean, I was really scared that I'd lost you even though I never really had you."  
  
This statement was followed by a very awkward silence in which Sirius made a face that said, 'Why the hell did I say that?' which Raven noticed.  
  
"Well, I guess my reaction was kinda real at first, too. But then I just decided to play it up since we were gonna break up today anyway."  
  
"What do you mean it was real at first?"  
  
"Like, when I saw you kissing her, I kinda forgot for a second that it was all just pretend, and I felt really hurt." Raven became nervous and started rambling, "So, I ran into my room cuz I didn't know why I was so jealous. And then I came to my senses, and decided it was a good way to break up, anyway."  
  
"And why would you be jealous?" asked Sirius.  
  
"I don't know, okay? God, I didn't wanna tell you this, cuz I knew then you'd get like that and think that I liked you for real or something."  
  
"You do, don't you?" charmed Sirius.  
  
Raven sighed and rolled her eyes. "I had a brief moment of feeling like I didn't possibly hate you, but it passed like, five minutes after it happened." Raven's face went pink, but she kept going. "Especially after you danced with me, ya know, to the Dirty Dancing song."  
  
"Now you know how I felt when I kissed you after the song you did last night. I don't know, something just came over me, and I couldn't stop myself from kissing you."  
  
"Yeah, well now I also know what you meant by not being able to control your tongue," Raven smiled.  
  
"Exactly! It's just hard sometimes. Anyway, it won't happen again."  
  
"Ditto."  
  
"...Unless you want it to," said Sirius, suavely.  
  
"Shut up! Not after you made out with a Slytherin whore!"  
  
Sirius laughed. "C'mon, let's go break up! I'm thinkin you should bitch- slap me or something."  
  
"Are you shittin me? I getta smack you?"  
  
"Sure, why not? I mean, I did cheat on you."  
  
"Yeah, you deserve it!" agreed Raven. "So, we could just like walk out by them, arguing, and then I slap you, and it's all over?"  
  
"Sounds good to me."  
  
"Okay, let's go."  
  
The two of them walked back out of the dressing room and started up an argument.  
  
"No, I can never forgive you! Sirius, you fucking snogged another girl!"  
  
"I did not! She kissed me, and it was only for five seconds, tops."  
  
"You certainly seemed to be enjoying it!"  
  
"Oh yeah! Yeah, Rave, I really enjoyed it! She is a hundred times better than you are!"  
  
To everyone else's astonishment, she slapped him... way too hard, and her eyes widened with alarm.  
  
Panic-stricken, she gasped, "Oh my God, I didn't mean to hit you that hard! Sirius, are you okay?"  
  
"Jesus," he laughed, "I said you could slap me, I didn't say you could beat the shit outta me!"  
  
"I just got overenthusiastic about getting to hit you! I'm sorry!"  
  
"It's okay; I'm fine," he said and then realized that the shit had just hit the fan and added, "...but ya kinda blew our cover."  
  
Raven and Sirius turned to look at James, Lily, Remus, and Peter, who were all very mixed-up. Suddenly, the two of them burst into laughter from the looks on their faces.  
  
"Okay, what the hell is this?" asked James, dumbfounded.  
  
"April Fool's!" said Sirius.  
  
Raven hit him across the chest, "It's September."  
  
"Well, you got somethin better than that?"  
  
"Guys, what is going on?" asked James, louder.  
  
"Well, Sirius had this idea. Since you guys wouldn't stop bugging us about liking each other, we thought we'd play this little practical joke on you," Raven explained.  
  
"What?"  
  
"We were never going out. It was all a scam to get you guys off our backs," added Sirius.  
  
"You lied to us?" demanded James.  
  
"Well, not exactly! I mean, we never really answered when you asked us if we were going out," Raven pointed out.  
  
"So, the kiss after the date-" James began.  
  
"Wasn't real. We planned it ahead of time," explained Raven.  
  
"So, there was never another girl that Sirius kissed?" Lily asked.  
  
"Well, that actually was kinda real. I went out with her last year," said Sirius.  
  
James looked pissed, but everyone else seemed kind of relieved to have two of their best friends back without them fighting or snogging. Nevertheless, they all agreed never to bug Sirius and Raven about liking each other again! A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	10. Chapter 10

Marauder Mayhem Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way. Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Top That" from Teen Witch. Chapter 10 September 7th  
  
The return to normalcy that followed the Marauders the next few weeks was greatly appreciated by them all. They found it a lot easier when Sirius and Raven were on speaking terms and not pretending to snog every five minutes. On Saturday the gang was walking to dinner when they spotted Eve walking towards them down the hallway.  
  
"Hey, Sirius. What do you say we go get ourselves lost?" she called, slyly.  
  
"Give it a rest, Eve. I already told you, sloppy seconds aren't my style," he snapped back.  
  
"Whatever you say, sweetie. You just don't wan to admit to your new little girlfriend that you still want me."  
  
Sirius scoffed. "A - she's not my girlfriend, but B - she's more to me than you'll ever be, and C - when I left for the summer, I was perfectly content with never having to see you again, and now that I have, I'm thinking about going back to Germany."  
  
James, Remus, and Raven looked at each other and then said in unison, "Over our dead bodies!" Sirius beamed at them and smiled.  
  
"She's not your girlfriend?" Eve asked, excitedly.  
  
"Nah, we already tried that, right guys?" said Raven, turning to the other Marauders and giving them a wink.  
  
"Then why did she run off when she saw you kiss me?"  
  
"You kissed me, I did not kiss you back."  
  
"Because we were interrupted by her!" defended Eve.  
  
"No, see she had to act like all jealous and stuff because they were pulling a prank on us," explained James, still a little ticked that it was all just a joke.  
  
"We were pretending to go out because we wanted to teach them a lesson," added Sirius, seeing Eve's roll her eyes up into her head.  
  
"So, you aren't going out with her?" she asked, hopefully.  
  
"No."  
  
"Oh good."  
  
"Uh, but as far as you're concerned, " added Sirius hastefully, "I'm not available."  
  
Eve then scoffed and looked at Raven loathingly. "Well, you really did a number on him, didn't you?" she said, given Raven an icy stare. "If it weren't for you he'd be begging me to come back right now."  
  
"And I'm begging you to shut the hell up because you have no idea what you're talking about," snapped Raven.  
  
Eve wasn't listening. ".Why he would want a skinny little bitch like you-"  
  
"-Hey! Watch it, Eve. She may not be my girlfriend, but I'll always look out for her, and you will never talk to her like that again, got it?"  
  
"Ha!" Eve yelled as she stalked off. The Marauders stood there in silence staring after her.  
  
"I'm not skinny," stated Raven after a minute.  
  
Sirius chuckled. "Yes, you are," he said as he put his arms on her shoulders and led her into the Great Hall.  
  
"No, I'm not!" she said. She turned around to face Sirius. "You think I am?"  
  
"Well, you're not too skinny if that's what you mean."  
  
"Would it matter to you if I was?" said Raven, getting a little defensive.  
  
"Not unless you were anorexic."  
  
"Then why are you arguing with me?"  
  
"I dunno," he said honestly, "cuz I thought we were past due for another row; it's been, what?, ten minutes since our last one."  
  
"Good point. What were we even arguing about before?"  
  
"I dunno," said Sirius, waving his hand, dismissingly.  
  
"The difference between a stalagmite and a stalactite," said James.  
  
"Oh yeah. What was the verdict?" asked Remus.  
  
"Stalagmite's got an 'm' in it," said Raven.  
  
"Oh right." said Moony. And they all continued to eat in silence.  
  
"Guys, I gotta go to the library. I'll meet you in the common room later," said Raven as she got up from the table.  
  
When she did step back into the common room, what she saw was chaos. Sirius was standing in the middle of the room, surrounded by pretty much everyone else in the House. He was singing along to a song on the radio.  
  
"Rave, get over here! We're doin karaoke!" shouted James as Sirius began to sing.  
  
"I'm king, and they know it! When I snap my fingers everybody says, 'Show it!' I'm hot, and you're not! But if you wanna hang with me, I'll give it one shot. Top that! Top that! You can give all you can, but you will never top that! You can dream until you're blue, but you can never top that!"  
  
"Oh, he is so hot!" Raven heard an excited 5th year girl exclaim to her friends as she walked by and stood next to Lily.  
  
Sirius continued, "I'm hot, and you're not! But if you wanna hang with me, I'll give it one shot. Top that!"  
  
Raven laughed and turned to Lily. "Watch this," she smiled, deviously and stepped into the circle to sing the next part. "Supersonic, idiotic, disconnecting, not respecting, who would ever really wanna go and top that? Such a waste of pretty face, but hangin on your no one's face. I wish that you would take a look and really stop that! Top that? Stop that! I don't really give a fuck about tryin to top that. Top that? Stop that! I wish you'd finally take a real look and really stop that."  
  
Sirius got back into it, "What's this?"  
  
"Stop that!"  
  
"What gives?"  
  
"Stop that! I don't really give a fuck about tryin to top that," Raven sang again.  
  
"Top that!"  
  
"Big deal."  
  
"Top that!"  
  
"Unreal."  
  
"You can try until you're blue-" started Sirius.  
  
"--I will make a fool of you!"  
  
"TOP THAT!" Sirius and Raven finished the song together.  
  
Then Raven turned and walked to the fireplace, tapping Lucy's portrait. When the portrait opened up, she turned back around to look at Sirius. "Top that!" she said before disappearing through the door. A/N: I LOVE THAT MOVIE! HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	11. Chapter 11

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Songs: There aren't any songs in this chapter, but a good one would be "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred, hehe.  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Chapter 11 - September 29th   
  
"The game is Quiddich, kids...strip Quiddich. The rules are simple: three on three, the team that is scored on has to take off an article of clothing until...there isn't anything else to take off." Sirius grinned briefly and winked at Raven and Lily as they stood on the Quiddich pitch in their pajamas with their hands on their hips. "There's no snitch or seaker, no bludgers or beaters. One person from each team has to be the goalie unless you want your ass kicked."  
  
Raven leaned over and spoke out of the corner of her mouth to Lily, "I picked a bad night not to wear a bra to bed."  
  
Lily's eyes darted around her for any sign of a teacher. "I'm more worried about getting caught outside."  
  
Sirius continued, "We'll play four goals wins. Four goals, four articles of clothing. For guys, it's robes, shirts, pajama pants and boxers. For girls, it's shirts, bras, pajama pants, and underwear."  
  
Raven made a sound and raised her hand.  
  
Sirius stopped. "Yes, Ms. McKinnon?" he played the role of teacher.  
  
"What if we don't...have..." she couldn't find the words, but Sirius knew what she meant. His eyes darted to her chest and she quickly crossed her arms in front of her. "Maybe you should have planned this a little better."  
  
"You sleep in a sweatshirt?" he asked her.  
  
"No," Raven gritted her teeth. "I have a tank top under this, but it's white and it's about to rain."  
  
A smile slowly crept along Sirius' face. "So then for girls, it's shirts, skivvies, pants, and underwear."  
  
"Boxers," she corrected him.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes. "Raven, you take all the fun outta life. Aren't you girls supposed to wear some cute little bra with matching underwear to bed?"  
  
"All the girls you've dated must have been secretly hookers," snapped Raven.  
  
"The point is," said James, before Sirius could answer Raven, "everyone has to be wearing only four pieces of clothing. Are we covered? There are three of us who play on the house team, so we need to split up."  
  
Lily immediately clung to James' arm, knowing that since he actually played a chaser, she would have a better chance of staying dry if she was on his team.   
  
"What do you say, Rave? Would you rather get naked with me or for me?"  
  
"Padfoot, don't be such a prick!" shouted James. He could see that Raven had about had it.  
  
"I'd rather distract you from the game," she replied, putting her arms around Remus' and Peter's heads and forcing them down into a huddle. "Guys, if Sirius' sees me naked it's gonna haunt me for the rest of my life, so we gotta win, okay?"  
  
"No problem, Minx. Just tell us what a quaffle is and we'll be all set," teased Remus.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "Please don't joke about something so serious."  
  
"Wow, you've really got him on the brain, haven't you?" Remus smiled at her.  
  
"Yeah, cuz I wanna kick his ass! Now, I have a plan..."  
  
As Raven started telling Remus and Peter, "The Plan," and Sirius, James, and Lily went over their game stradegies, it began to rain. Raven looked over at Sirius who winked at her. She held up her middle finger and kissed it. Then she extended her hand, blowing him a kiss. Sirius made a motion to "catch the kiss" and then put it in his pocket.   
  
Remus decided he'd be keeper for Raven and Peter while Lily was forced to be keeper for Sirius and James. Raven started out with the quaffle and threw it to Peter, who dropped it. Raven turned to roll her eyes at Remus while Sirius scooped it up and threw it to James. James expertly dodged through the air as if there were bludgers coming at him and threw the quaffle towards the goal. Remus caught it before it went through the hoops and threw it to Raven. Raven caught it and sped off toward Lily. Sirius cut her off halfway down the field and flew backwards, facing her. Raven moved to the left and Sirius moved to his right. She moved to her right, and he blocked her moving to his left. She moved to the left again and just as Sirius followed she went into a deep dive underneath him. She came back up from the dive so fast that Lily wasn't ready and the quaffle went through the middle hoop.  
  
"Yow!" yelled Remus from the other end of the field. "Gotta watch out for those seeker moves, Sirius." Peter and Raven joined Remus in laughing and Sirius shook his head and shrugged off his robe. James did the same, and then he turned to watch Lily. She lifted her sweatshirt over her head only to reveal a dark blue t-shirt. James sighed.   
  
Lily threw the quaffle to James and he sped right past Raven, who had just finished clapping hands with Peter. She turned around to fly after him. She was coming up on his tail when Sirius bumped into her from the side. They flew together for awhile and when Raven tried to speed up, Sirius grabbed the end of her broom and held her back.   
  
Raven looked back and him as James scored a goal. "You prick. You wanna play hardball? I'm game."  
  
Sirius mimicked her in a female voice, "You wanna play hardball? I'm game." He returned to his normal voice, "Now strip!"  
  
Remus and Peter gave their robes to Raven and she landed to set them on the ground. Sirius was busy watching her slide off her pajama pants as Remus gave Peter the quaffle.   
  
"Sirius, get in the damn game!" yelled James as he chased after Peter.  
  
Sirius shook his head as Raven got back onto her broom and rose to the air in her light purple boxers. The storm picked up and it started to thunder as well as rain heavily. Sirius turned around and went after Peter but Raven called after him.  
  
"Hey Sirius..." Sirius turned to look at her. Raven lifted up her sweatshirt to distract him as Peter threw the quaffle at the hoops.  
  
"That is so not fair! Interference!" he screamed at her.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "Take a penalty shot if you can't handle it."  
  
"Padfoot, they didn't score anyway," said James.  
  
Sirius looked back to see Lily holding the quaffle.   
  
There was a crack of thunder and the six of them jumped. "Um...should we be playing in this weather?" asked Peter.  
  
3333333333333333333  
  
Albus Dumbledore leaned forward on his fists and spoke quite calmly, "And how exactly does one play strip Quiddich?"  
  
The six of them immediately looked at the ground. They were all in folding chairs scattered in a circle around the headmaster's desk and soaking wet. James, on the far right, was grasping Lily's hand. Lily sat next to him shivering from her damp clothes and shaking nervously. Peter sat next to Lily, clutching his cloak around his naked upper body and blowing his nose into it. Sirius came next, wearing a mischievous smirk that was directed towards Raven. Raven wore only purple boxer shorts and a white, sodden tank top, but Sirius had taken his sopping wet cloak and draped it around her shoulders. Remus sat, bare chested, on the far left with his own cloak drawn around him.  
  
Sirius decided to break the silence. "Well, Professor, it's played exactly the same as regular Quiddich only...you strip when the other team scores a goal," he supplied bluntly.  
  
"Ah," said the headmaster, nodding his head. "Can it only be played at two o'clock in the morning in the middle of a thunderstorm?"   
  
"Um...no, it can be played anytime," responded Sirius, conversationally.  
  
"Sirius, just shut up!" said Lily, glancing nervously at Dumbledore. He was only making things worse.  
  
"Look, Professor," tried Raven, "it was a dare. Sirius dared James, but they needed more players, and then...and then..." she trailed off as she noticed him looking intently at her, as if he were reading her mind.   
  
Dumbledore directed his gaze now to James and Lily. "And what do our Head Girl and Boy have to say about this?"  
  
All of the blood rushed to Lily's face and she squeezed James' hand. James answered for her. "It won't happen again, Professor."  
  
"I see. Well I would imagine you'll all want to get into some dry pajamas after your hot cocoa." He waved his wand and six steaming cups of hot chocolate materialized before them. "You may report back here tomorrow night for your detention."  
  
One by one, the six of them took a mug and filed wordlessly out of his office.   
  
On their way back up to Gryffindor Tower, Sirius broke the silence. "So we're taking a raincheck then?" he nudged Raven playfully in the ribs.  
  
"Yeah, maybe we can have *fair* teams next time?" retorted Raven, sipping her hot cocoa.  
  
"There isn't gonna be a next time you two. We'd definitely get expelled if he caught us out there again," said Lily.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes and downed his hot chocolate.  
  
"It'll be okay, Lily," said James as they came to the girls' dormitory. Lily gave him a weak smile and disappeared through the oak door.  
  
"Night, Rave," said the four guys in unison as she tapped the wall by the fireplace and Lucy's portrait appeared.  
  
The portrait slid up. "Night."  
  
The guys continued up the stairs to their dorm. "Dammit, Moony! Did you hafta call the game right at that second? One more goal and Rave would have been down to her skivvies!"  
  
"Yes, Padfoot, I had to. The storm was getting worse. Can you imagine what a little electroshock therapy would have done for your libido?" Remus responded, smirking along with James and Peter.  
  
Sirius snorted. "Hot to trot!"  
  
"Yeah, the next girl that took him on would light up like a pinball machine and pay off in silver dollars!" laughed James.  
  
The four of them laughed loudly, but quieted when they came to their dorm so they wouldn't disturb their fellow Gryffindors. They changed into dry pajamas in silence and fell into their beds.  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKE THIS CHAPTER, IT'S ONE OF MY FAVORITES. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	12. Chapter 12

Marauder Mayhem  
  
A/N: For those of you who don't want to bother emailing me to get Chapter 11, what basically happened is they went out to play strip Quiddich, they got caught, and all had to serve detention.  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Chapter 12 - October 2nd  
  
Lily and all the Marauders had to serve detention on the last night of September for their little nighttime strip Quiddich game, but they thought it was worth it. James, Sirius, and Raven really did need to practice, as the Quiddich season officially started the next day and Wood would be on their asses about practicing every five seconds. Everyone in the school found out about their strip Quiddich game and they all, even Peter, instantly became a legacy. People would stop them in the halls and ask them the rules.  
  
"Now don't go thinking that we're going to turn every practice into Strip Quiddich, Black!" said Wood at their first team practice as he was welcoming Raven to the team.  
  
"Well, of course not every one, Justin." replied Sirius.  
  
"Not any of them!" yelled Wood. "That is, unless we win the cup. Then, you're free to do whatever the hell you want."  
  
"Well, thank you."  
  
"Alright, men!"  
  
James cleared his throat.  
  
"And Raven," Justin added, quickly. "Let's get to it!"  
  
After two hours of practice, they were all beat. They trudged up to Gryffindor Tower and plopped down on the floor in front of the fireplace, next to Remus and Peter.  
  
"Where's Lily?" asked James, looking around the common room.  
  
"Head Girl duties," said Remus. "Aren't you supposed to be-"  
  
"Oh fuck!" said James, getting up again and running out of the portrait. Lily and James had been made Head Boy and Girl after the first few weeks of school because the had the highest grades in their previous years.  
  
"Tell me again why he's head boy," said Sirius.  
  
"Cuz he can kiss ass," said Raven  
  
"So can I," justified Sirius.  
  
"Yeah, but you're stupid," she stated.  
  
"Oh yeah..." he replied, lightly punching her arm.  
  
"Oh Justin, Black just hit my snitch arm," whined Raven.  
  
"What?" said Wood, throwing a roll of parchment at Sirius.  
  
"I can't take this abuse!" said Sirius, getting up and walking up to the boys' dormitories.  
  
"What a wimp!" said Remus, jokingly.  
  
"Gotta love him," said Raven.  
  
"Okay, speak for yourself, Ray!" said Remus.  
  
"You think I'd speak for you? I don't even know your language!" she said. "You're not suggesting that I mean-"  
  
"No! No, no, no! I wouldn't dream of accusing you of liking each other again! I don't wanna get scammed!"  
  
"Good!"  
  
Sirius came running back down the stairs and sat down unnecessarily close to Raven, though she didn't even acknowledge his presence.  
  
"Yes, I'm back."  
  
"So I smell."  
  
"That's my shaving cream! Wanna feel a real clean, close shave?" he said, taking her hand and bringing it up to his cheek.  
  
"I'll pass," she jerked her hand back. "Couldn't find anyone else to bug, huh?"  
  
"C'mon, you know you're the one I wanna bug!" he said, prodding her in the back.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes and arched her back from the prod. "I'm so bored."  
  
"Let's pretend we're going out again," said Sirius.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"It would give us something to do, wouldn't it?"  
  
"So go out with Peter."  
  
Sirius scrunched up his face at the thought. "Why don't you? In fact, Remus would be even better! You've already done a vampire and a pirate! Why not a w-"  
  
Remus kicked him, sharply. He looked quickly at Raven and saw that she must not have heard him.  
  
"Like you should talk, Sirius. Rumor has it you were quite the womanizer last year," baited Raven.  
  
"Alright, which one of you told?" asked Sirius, looking from Remus to Peter.  
  
"They both did; are you gonna deny it?" she asked.  
  
"Hell no, I'm proud of it!" Sirius responded.  
  
"Then why didn't you want me to know?"  
  
"Cuz I knew you'd give me shit."  
  
"Why would you think that?" questioned Raven, innocently.  
  
"Cuz you give me shit about everything."  
  
Raven opened her mouth to disagree but Sirius pointed his finger at her and she closed it.  
  
"You know you do. I think you rather like it," he said.  
  
"Why would you be proud of something like that?" she questioned.  
  
"I'm not. I was back then. I don't know; I guess I'm different now."  
  
"How so?"  
  
"Maybe meeting you changed me," suggested Sirius.  
  
"What does that mean?" Raven thought for a minute. "Oh, you're gay!"  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes. "Oh yeah. Yeah, the gayest!"  
  
"So that's why you hit on me so much! See, I thought it was because you were in love with me."  
  
"Yeah, I get that a lot. But it's all an act, ya know," Sirius looked over at Remus who was sitting there with a pained expression on his face. Sirius nodded and winked at him. "Hey, Moon," he said, raising his eyebrows, "you know what I'm talkin about."  
  
Remus pretended to gag and threw a quill at him, but Sirius ducked and it hit Peter instead. Peter let out a yelp and looked over by a group of 5th years for the culprit.  
  
Remus chuckled and then turned back to Sirius. "I might actually believe you, Padfoot. You haven't had a girlfriend since last year, as far as I know. And let's face it, you could have any girl in this school."  
  
Sirius chomped on his gum, loudly, and replied in a feminine voice, "Like, oh my God, Moony, that is so sweet of you to say!"  
  
"Almost," said Raven.  
  
"Almost what?" asked Sirius forgetting the gay voice.  
  
"Almost any girl in this school."  
  
"Like I'd want you anyway!" he retorted.  
  
"I was talking about Lily. She's obviously got it for James," said Raven.  
  
"Ya think? Have they even kissed yet?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah, for like two seconds," said Raven.  
  
"Is she a prude?"  
  
"Excuse me! She's my best friend! She's just not that experienced when it comes to guys."  
  
"Poor James," said Sirius, coldly.  
  
"You're such a prick!"  
  
"Really, Sirius, he's gotten more than you!" defended Peter, getting back in the conversation.  
  
"No he hasn't!" yelled Sirius. "At least I got tongue."  
  
Remus widened his eyes and turned to Raven. "Rave, anything you'd care to share?"  
  
"What are you looking at me like that for? We pretended to go out; we had to kiss!"  
  
"You didn't have to give him tongue!" he said.  
  
"Tell him that! He's the one who stuck his tongue down my throat just because he knew he could get away with it! What was I supposed to do? I wanted to knock him out, but that would have blown the scam!"  
  
Sirius was laughing. "Padfoot, you're the devil!" said Remus.  
  
Sirius returned to his gay voice, "Turns you on, doesn't it?"  
  
Remus screwed up his face and gave him the finger.  
  
"God, you're disgusting, Sirius!"  
  
"What? Maybe if some of these girls think I like guys, they'll stop followin me around everywhere!"  
  
"Nah, then they'd just be followin you around for make-up tips!" said Raven.  
  
"And I would say, 'None!' Make-up's gross," Sirius said.  
  
"Oh, that's why you dated Eve?" accused Raven.  
  
"Good point," said Sirius, gagging. "You don't wear any."  
  
"Do too. You just can't tell."  
  
"What do you wear then?"  
  
"Mascara... And lip gloss, if that counts."  
  
"Yeah, but that's not like gross make-up. I meant like schalack all over your face."  
  
"Schalack?" Raven asked.  
  
"Yeah. Like one of my old girlfriends used to take like two hours just to put on her make-up with this little tiny brush. I'm like, 'Get a roller; let's go!'"  
  
Remus and Raven started laughing. "Hey, don't you wear make-up at the club?" asked Remus.  
  
"Oh yeah. But we have to. It's just so our features stand out better onstage."  
  
"God, I'm bored. When's the next full moon?" asked Sirius, offhandedly.  
  
Remus shot him a look and quickly kicked him. Raven became suddenly alert.  
  
She began to smile, looking from Remus to Sirius. "I think it's on Wednesday, that sound right, Moony?"  
  
Remus just stared at her, trying to read her mind.  
  
"Why do they call you Moony, anyway?" she asked, slyly.  
  
Remus stared into her eyes. "How long have you known?"  
  
Raven laughed. "Since the day I met you when we were fourteen."  
  
"What?" Remus was confused.  
  
"I came over to James' looking for him and you were there. Jay said there was a boggart in the basement storage room and he wanted to have some fun, remember?"  
  
Comprehension dawned on him. "Shit. You knew all this time? Why didn't you say anything?"  
  
"Why didn't you just tell me?"  
  
"It's complicated, Raven. I was bitten when I was really little, and every friend I had before these guys, I lost when I told them what I was. I didn't want to lose you."  
  
"How could you think I would be like that? Don't you know me at all? I would never disown my friends for anything."  
  
"I know, Raven. I just didn't know how to tell you. I knew you'd figure it out, eventually. If these gits can," he waved a hand at Sirius and Peter, "I knew you could."  
  
Sirius gave him the finger. Raven turned to him. "So what's your excuse, Padfoot?"  
  
"What are you talking about?" he asked her.  
  
"Why do they call you Padfoot?"  
  
"Cuz I have a big black dog at home and it's the only thing I actually like in that house."  
  
Raven stared at him and then shrugged. "Okay, sure, whatever."  
  
Sirius was thankful she didn't start hounding him with questions. "So what are we gonna do? I'm bored! Raven, what are we gonna do?"  
  
"Why are you asking me?"  
  
"Well, what do you do when you're bored?"  
  
"Write songs about how boring it is," joked Raven.  
  
"Hey, yeah! Let's write a song!" exclaimed Sirius.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Well, about us! Like a Marauder theme song!" he explained.  
  
"Okay," Raven picked up the parchment that Wood had thrown at Sirius. "Accio quill!" she said as the quill that had hit Peter zoomed to her hand. She handed them both to Sirius. "Here, get writing."  
  
"Me? I can't write! You!" he said, pushing the quill and paper back at her.  
  
"How would that make you not bored?"  
  
"Well, I'm gonna watch and criticize!"  
  
"Like hell you are! You can help me. It's not that hard to write a song! How are your rhyming skills? Boy?"  
  
"Girl."  
  
"I SAID RHYMING, NOT WORD ASSOCIATION! For example, toy and boy rhyme."  
  
"Oh, okay I get it! Give me another one!" said Sirius.  
  
"Git," Raven muttered under her breath.  
  
"Tit!"  
  
"Sirius! That wasn't the word! We aren't gonna write a song about tits!"  
  
"Well, why the hell not?" he cried.  
  
"I thought you were gay, Padfoot," Remus chided.  
  
"You wish!" he replied.  
  
And so Raven tried to help Sirius write a song about the Marauders.  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	13. Chapter 13

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Prowlin" from Grease 2.  
  
Chapter 13  
  
October 4th  
  
The next night found the Marauders at the club performing their new theme song. Raven refused  
  
take part in it because Sirius had taken over writing it, and she really didn't know what to expect. Sirius had spent the entire day teaching the song to James, Remus, and Peter, and now they were going to perform it for Raven and Lily. Suddenly the lights went down and they took the stage.  
  
"Well, c'mon and tell us, Padfoot," sang Remus.  
  
"What's the secret of success?" sang James.  
  
Sirius sang, "You've gotta take a tip from the king of hip, cuz you know that he's the best."  
  
Then all of them joined in. "We're goin prowlin'. We're goin prowlin'. Tonight!"  
  
"You say you're hungry for a lover. Gotta find a chick who can give you more," sang Sirius. "Well there's a spot that I've discovered, where a guy's guaranteed to score! I'm gonna show you cats some action, like you've never seen before. We're gonna get some satisfaction. Gorgeous girls galore! We're goin prowlin'."  
  
"Walk, talk like Marauders," sang Remus, Peter, and James.  
  
"Prowlin'," Sirius continued.  
  
"Walk, talk like Marauders."  
  
"Prowowowlin'."  
  
"Toniiiight!" they all joined in.  
  
Sirius started the next verse and pulled Raven up on stage with them. "There's a pretty dancer, at the club that's called 'Unplugged.' She's got the best tongue in town," he winked at her as she dropped her mouth wide open. "Yeah, her kiss'll make you feel like you're drugged."  
  
They all joined in again, surrounding her, "She'll be the apple of your eye, and she's sweet just like a cherry pie. Just waitin for some guy to come, and take her right up to the sky.  
  
James stepped up front and spoke into the microphone. "Well, I like a debutante, who comes across. Now that's what I call class," he said, winking at Lily.  
  
Peter stepped up and said, "I like a tall girl with long legs, that go right up to her-"  
  
Raven gasped and slapped her hand over his mouth.  
  
"You know what I like?" interrupted Remus. "I like a girl that's really smart, provided that she's really stacked!"  
  
"Yeah?" said Sirius, "well, I love em all, and they looove me. Cuz I'm the leader of this here pack! We're goin prowlin'." Raven shook her head and ran offstage to stand by Lily again.  
  
"Walk, talk like Marauders."  
  
"Prowlin'."  
  
"Walk, talk like Marauders."  
  
"Prowowowlin'."  
  
"Toniiiight!"  
  
"We're goin prowlin', prowlin'."  
  
"Toniiiight. Tonight!" they all finished.  
  
They ended the song and headed back over to Lily and Raven, who were standing by the backstage door giggling. "Well? What do you think of my writing skills?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Not bad, Siri. Kinda scary, but not bad," Raven answered.  
  
"Yeah, well it needs work, but I thought it was funny."  
  
They were all heading back into the Gryffindor Common Room under James' invisibility cloak when they heard the headmaster's voice behind them. "Good morning." They all gasped and turned around, taking off the cloak. "I need to speak with Ms. McKinnon. Would one of you be so kind as to send her up to my office?" They were all silent for a second, probably wondering how he knew they were there.  
  
"Uh, ye-yessir!" said James. "Right away, Professor." Dumbledore turned on his heel and very cheerfully (for one o'clock in the morning) strode off in the direction of his office.  
  
"Shit, I hope we didn't get her in trouble!" said Sirius.  
  
"Why would he want to talk to her if we're the ones he caught?" asked James, tapping the wall where Lucy's portrait was. The portrait slid up and they entered Raven's room. Raven was lying in bed with the covers pulled up, reading a book with her lamp on.  
  
"Uh, Ray, Dumbledore wants to see you," said James.  
  
Raven looked up and closed her book. "Wha'd I do?"  
  
"I dunno. He just caught us coming into the common room," said Lily, worried.  
  
"Great, thanks guys," said Raven, jumping off the bed and putting on her purple bathrobe over her pajamas.  
  
"Good luck. We'll be in the commons," said Sirius.  
  
"No, don't wait up. I'll tell you guys whatever it is in the morning. It can't be that bad. Night," she said, leaving them in her bedroom. She popped her head back in the doorway, "Jay, what's the password?"  
  
"Oh... uh, Chocolate Bunny," he said.  
  
"Huh?" asked Raven, Sirius, Remus, and Peter.  
  
"Chocolate Bunny. It's what muggles get in their Easter baskets at Easter," Lily explained.  
  
"But it isn't even remotely close to Easter," argued Raven.  
  
"Well, that's what the password is, so." said James.  
  
"Okay."  
  
Raven had already turned back around and gone to find the gargoyle that guarded the entrance to Dumbledore's office. She said the password and it sprang to life, revealing a stairway leading up. She pushed open the wooden doors and entered the office.  
  
"Professor?" she called, but he was nowhere to be seen. Fawkes made a noise, and Raven made her way over to him, petting his soft, red feathers.  
  
"Please forgive the late hour in my summoning you here, my dear Raven. I thought I should tell you now so that you can leave as soon as possible after breakfast."  
  
"Leave? Am I being expelled again?" she asked, a little uneasily.  
  
"Good heaven's, what made you think that? No, no, I've just been speaking with your uncle. He has been unavoidably detained in Germany, and he needs you to go to the Durmstrang School of Magic and get Headmaster Plutana to sign these documents," Dumbledore flicked his wand, and a stack of papers materialized on his desk.  
  
"Durmstrang? But why does he need me to go?" asked Raven.  
  
"It has to do with the Magical Schools Mandatory Registry Arrangement that he led me to believe you know all about and worked on with him this summer," he answered her.  
  
"MSMRA. Yeah, I remember. How am I supposed to get there?" asked Raven.  
  
"Unfortunately, Durmstrang does not want our Floo Network connected to their school. I have arranged for the Hogwarts Express to take you directly there."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"My pleasure. Now I suggest you get right to bed. The Hogwarts Express will be waiting at Hogsmeade Station for you at 8 o'clock.  
  
"Okay," Raven got up to leave, but Dumbledore stopped her.  
  
"I'm sending Mr. Black along with you," he said.  
  
"Sirius? Why?"  
  
"Well, he went to Durmstrang last summer for a Quiddich camp to get out of going to Spain with his family, I imagine. He should know his way around there."  
  
"Good idea. Thank you," she said.  
  
She made her way back to Gryffindor Tower and into her room. She sighed and laid back down on her bed, pulling up the covers and turning out the light. Suddenly, an arm found its way across her body and she let out a scream. Then a hand covered her mouth to keep her from screaming.  
  
"It's me, it's me!" said Sirius' voice in the darkness. Raven wriggled away from him and found the light. She turned it on and sat up in bed. Sirius was lying there with an amused look on his face.  
  
"What are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? You scared the shit outta me!" she yelled, hitting him a few times.  
  
"You always said you wondered what it would be like to wake up next to me every morning!" he justified, putting his hands over his head to protect himself from her knuckles.  
  
"I meant it as an insult!" she said, hitting him again.  
  
"The couple that lays together, stays together!"  
  
"We are NOT a couple!" Raven overbalanced and fell off the bed.  
  
"Uh-oh..." Sirius looked over the edge of the bed, "are you okay, Ray?"  
  
"No!"  
  
He put out his hand and lifted her back onto the bed. "Sorry."  
  
"Siri, you hafta go! I gotta get some sleep before tomorrow."  
  
"Okay, I just wanted to see if you were in trouble with Dumbledore."  
  
"Oh! No, but you need to get some sleep, too."  
  
"I will. I just wanted to know what he wanted."  
  
"I hafta go to Durmstrang to get my uncle's proposal signed or something. And... you're coming with me."  
  
"I am?" asked Sirius, stunned.  
  
"Yeah, Dumbledore said you had to come with me because you went there last year or something?"  
  
"Last summer. For Quiddich camp. When do we leave?" he asked.  
  
"In the morning, so we need to sleep."  
  
"Okay. Night then," he said, getting off her bed and heading for the door. Then he spun back around. "That is, unless you want me to stay..."  
  
"Goodnight, Sirius."  
  
"Goodnight," he replied, gloomily. 


	14. Chapter 14

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Poison" by Alice Cooper.  
  
Chapter 14 - October 5th  
  
"When do we leave?" Sirius leaned over and whispered to Raven at the breakfast table. "Right after breakfast."  
  
"What? Leave? Where are you going?" asked James.  
  
"Oh, didn't I tell ya, Jay? We're goin away together for the weekend," teased Sirius.  
  
"Can I come?" he asked.  
  
"Nah, three's a crowd. Especially for what we're gonna be doin," said Sirius, suggestively.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "God, why did I tell Dumbledore it was okay for him to come?"  
  
"Cuz you want me so bad you can taste it," he said.  
  
She was ignoring him. "Oh, that's right, so I could turn him down in front of all his old girlfriends!"  
  
"What? Girlfriends? At Durmstrang? Who says I had girlfriends at Durmstrang?" asked Sirius, eyeing James, Remus, and Peter.  
  
"Peter," Raven replied, calmly.  
  
"Dammit, Pete! James, why'd ya tell him?"  
  
"Cuz I thought it was funny. Honestly, Padfoot. We're there for two months and you're with half the school!" conveyed James.  
  
"I was not!" argued Sirius. "And Raven, don't you even think about it, I got a rep to protect! Sirius Black has never been turned down!"  
  
"Well, he's about to be in front of everyone in the school if he doesn't keep his hands off me the entire way," threatened Raven.  
  
"But can you at least pretend you're in love with me when we get there?"  
  
"No way!"  
  
"Oh, come on! It's not that hard!"  
  
"That's not the point."  
  
"Ahem." It was Dumbledore standing behind them. "Here are the documents you'll need Headmaster Plutana to sign. The Hogwarts Express is waiting for you now. I suggest you work on getting the papers signed right away first and then you'll have the remainder of the evening to explore the grounds. The Express will pick you up again at 8."  
  
"Thank you, Headmaster," said Raven as Sirius grabbed the papers he was holding out.  
  
"See you tonight, guys," said Sirius as they made their way out of the Great Hall and out the front doors of the castle. They boarded the Hogwarts Express and set off for Durmstrang.  
  
"So, you think you brought enough protection?" asked Raven as they sat back in their seats.  
  
"Protection?"  
  
"Well, all your old girlfriends are gonna wanna have another go before you leave tonight, right?"  
  
"Fuck you!" he said.  
  
"Oh, I don't think you'll have enough time," she replied. "So you and Jay went to Durmstrang for Quiddich camp?"  
  
"Yeah. It was pretty cool. We met this one guy who had just moved there from some school in the U.S."  
  
"Really? Maybe I knew him. What was his name?" asked Raven.  
  
The radio turned on and Alice Cooper's "Poison" was playing. Sirius froze, listening to the song and then laughed. "Rave, I hafta tell you something."  
  
"What?"  
  
He started to sing along to the song, "Your cruel device. Your blood, like ice."  
  
Raven let out a laugh. "Oh god, not this song!"  
  
Sirius continued singing, "One look could kill. My pain, your thrill!" He stood up and pulled out his wand, using it as a microphone and sang louder. "I wanna love you but I better not touch. I wanna hold you but my senses tell me to stop. I wanna kiss you but I want it to much." He got on his knees in front of Raven and held out his hands in front of her. "I wanna taste you but your lips are venomous poison! You're poison runnin through my veins. You're poison, I don't wanna break these chains!"  
  
"Okay, that's enough. You can get up now."  
  
But he continued with the song, "Your mouth, so hot! Your web, I'm caught! Your skin, so wet! Black lace on sweat-" Raven clapped a hand over his mouth.  
  
"Would you stop?"  
  
Sirius snapped out of it. "Alright, sorry."  
  
They rode in silence the rest of the way, although a few other good songs came on that Sirius desperately wanted to sing to. Every time a new song came on, Sirius would gasp and sit up in his chair, but Raven would give him an uncompromising look. When they had pulled up to the front gates of Durmstrang and both gotten out of the Hogwarts Express, the conductor came around to their side and told them he would be back at 8 to take them home. Raven and Sirius continued up the steps to the entrance. Sirius knocked six times on the door. The door opened and immediately closed again.  
  
A voice spoke through the door, "Oh no, not you, Black! No way, man! Haven't you caused enough trouble at this school?"  
  
"I'm not here to terrorize the school, I'm here on business, okay?" he said to the voice.  
  
"Yeah Sirius, business, uh-huh. I know what that means. You know, all the girls you left behind came runnin to me, and if they see you again, who knows what'll happen! You can't do that to me, man!" the voice replied.  
  
"Willem, I don't care about the girls! You can have em all, now will you please let us in!" pleaded Sirius.  
  
"Us?" the door quickly opened again and Willem looked out at Raven. "Oh, wow. Nice, Sirius! I guess that's why you don't need the other girls, huh?"  
  
"Will you let us in already, Willem!" he snapped.  
  
"Oh yeah, sure. Come right this way, Miss," said Willem. He took Raven's hand and led her across the threshold, almost closing the door on Sirius, who quickly stuck his foot in and kicked it open.  
  
"Save your breath, Will. This one's not like the girls here," he said, steering Raven away from him.  
  
"I can see that, Black, that's why I insist," he said, taking her hand again. "Now, what is a beautiful thing like yourself doing here?"  
  
"I'm not a thing and I'm here to see the Headmaster," replied Raven, pulling her hand away from him.  
  
"Well, I can escort you directly to his office, if you'll-"  
  
Sirius grabbed onto Raven and pulled her down the hallway. "Better shut the door, Willem."  
  
Willem looked behind him and gasped. Sirius had jinxed the door so that it had grown a mouth right where the doorknob was. "You'll wanna watch out for him," said Sirius to Raven, "he's a little pervert."  
  
"I could tell," she said. A loud bong sounded above them and suddenly all the doors running down the corridor opened, and students started filing out. Most of them continued walking past Sirius staring at him with their eyes wide open. A few of the girls gasped and smiled or winked at him.  
  
An especially ditsy looking girl flitted her eyelashes at him and said, "Hi, Sirius."  
  
"Hi, Heather," he replied, still steering Raven down the hallway.  
  
"Oh god, Sirius, your I.Q. just dropped ten points!" Raven exclaimed, looking back at the girl, who continued to stare after them.  
  
"I know, I know." he said. "I told you, didn't I?"  
  
"I'm surprised you remember their names! You warned me, you didn't tell me everything."  
  
"You wouldn't want me to, believe me," he said as another blonde actually stopped dead in her tracks in front of them and walked straight up to Sirius.  
  
"Er. hi, Jenna," he said, nervously.  
  
She slapped him right across the face. Raven and Sirius' mouths both dropped wide open as she turned on her heel, threw her hair over her shoulder, and stalked off. "I'm not sure I deserved that," he said, rubbing his cheek.  
  
"Are you okay?" Raven asked, putting her hand to his cheek and trying desperately to suppress a laugh.  
  
"You're laughing about this?" he exclaimed.  
  
"I'm not." she couldn't hold it anymore and covered her mouth, giggling uncontrollably, ".laughing."  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes and started walking again. Raven caught up to him. "Please don't leave me alone. The guys are all looking at me like I'm a piece of chocolate!"  
  
Now it was Sirius' turn to laugh. "Raven, take a look around. I told you, you're not like all the girls here."  
  
Raven looked around and noticed that more than half of the girls were blonde. The remainders were brunettes with an occasional redhead thrown in. Almost all of them had small turned up noses and dark brown eyes. Most of them had pasty-white skin and looked like they had never been exposed to the sunshine. Compared to Raven's caramel skin, bright blue almond-shaped eyes, and long, shiny, jet-black hair, they could have been a completely different species.  
  
"So, if you hadn't met me at Hogwarts, you'd be doing the exact same thing right now?" she asked as a boy with a long hooked nose gaped at her.  
  
"No, I'd already be to second base with you by now," he said.  
  
She stopped and stared at him. "I think it's my turn to slap you!"  
  
"I'm just saying! That's how I used to be! You changed me!"  
  
"I changed you?" she asked, bewildered.  
  
"Raven, you were the first girl that I ever made a move on that didn't give into me!"  
  
"EVER?" she screeched.  
  
"Ever. You made me realize how shitty it is to do that to someone."  
  
"Ever, wow. Sorry, I didn't realize I was making history here," she teased.  
  
They continued walking for a while, down hallways and turning corners, with girls still winking and smiling at Sirius. Then Raven looked up and gasped. A boy was walking towards her with his head down. He looked up at her and gasped, too. As they passed each other in the corridor, they slowly turned their heads to look at each other. Sirius looked back and realized Raven had stopped in the middle of the hallway and then realized who she was looking at.  
  
"Oh, hey, Vin! Raven, this is Vinny, he was a good friend of me and James when we were here." he trailed off when he realized they were staring at each other and ignoring his words.  
  
"Lizzie?" Vinny said to Raven, not taking his eyes from her.  
  
A huge smile spread across her face as she grabbed him and hugged him, "Vinny Krum? God, I thought I'd never see you again!" Sirius just stared.  
  
"What are you doing here?" he asked her.  
  
"Wait, time out!" Sirius waved his hands in front of their faces. "You know each other? Who the hell is Lizz-" he stopped and turned to Raven, "Raven Elizabeth McKinnon. You're Lizzie?"  
  
"Sirius, hi!" said Vinny, hugging him, too. "I didn't even see you!"  
  
"Yeah, I think that's cuz you were lookin at her!" he said.  
  
"So, I see you've met my Lizzie!"  
  
"Wait, wait. explain. All this time Raven was Lizzie?" Sirius was really confused.  
  
"Yes. He left America without a word after our fifth year, Sirius. We used to go out," Raven explained.  
  
"All he talked about was Lizzie when James and I got here for Quiddich camp last year and Vinny had just transferred here! Raven, how could you not tell me you knew Vinny!" said Sirius.  
  
"I didn't know you knew him!" she justified.  
  
"So, you guys are together now?" asked Vinny.  
  
"No!" they both said in unison. "We're friends," added Raven.  
  
"This is so weird. Okay, why do you call her Lizzie?" asked Sirius.  
  
"I went out with her for like a year when I was in America. My sister's name is Raveena, and I didn't want to call my girlfriend and my sister the same thing, I guess," he explained. "So, how's James?"  
  
"He's good. I can't believe you're here!"  
  
"I can't believe you're here! What are you doing here?" asked Vinny.  
  
Another loud gong sounded above them. "You're late?" Raven asked.  
  
"Screw it, I don't care! Tell me everything!" said Vinny.  
  
"Pluto's expecting us, Vin. We'll tell you after class. Meet us in the REC room, okay?" said Sirius.  
  
"Okay! Great! See you later!" Vinny ran into the next classroom.  
  
As Raven and Sirius continued down the hall, they heard a door open again and turned around to see Vinny running out of it and into another.  
  
"Wrong one!" he yelled down the hall at them. Raven and Sirius chuckled.  
  
"So." started Sirius. "Did y'all."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Nothin," he said quickly as they turned to a corridor that only lead to one door. "Let's just get this over with," said Sirius.  
  
"Er, okay." Sirius led her to Headmaster Plutana's office and knocked on the door.  
  
The door was opened by a large, bald-headed man. "What are you doing here, Black?" he snapped.  
  
"I brought Raven. Raven McKinnon, sir?"  
  
"You're Gordon McKinnon's daughter?" he asked, abruptly.  
  
"Niece. He would have come himself, but he's in Germany right now," she answered.  
  
"Yes, I know. Albus has already informed me of everything. I appreciate your uncle not just sending someone who knows nothing on the subject," he said, taking the documents from her.  
  
"Yes, I helped him write them, sir."  
  
"Mister Black, you can see yourself out if you please. I will need Ms. McKinnon to explain a few things to me before I sign."  
  
"Yes, sir. Lovely to have seen you again, sir." Raven seemed to be the only one who noticed the sarcasm in his voice. Sirius winked at Raven, gave her a thumbs up, and ambled slowly out of the office.  
  
He walked back the way he came, found the door Vinny had gone in, and looked through the window. Vinny was there, staring at the door. He perked up as Sirius waved at him. Raising his hand, he pretended to cough violently and asked the professor if he could get a drink of water.  
  
"Hey, where's Lizzie?" he asked Sirius as he came out the door.  
  
"Raven. She's still talkin to Pluto. Wanna just walk around for a bit?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Yeah." They started walking, slowly, in silence.  
  
"So, is that what you were always talkin to James about?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Lizzie? Yeah, when I mentioned that I missed Lizzie, he knew I meant Raven. And then we both figured out that we knew the same person, because she had talked about me in her owls to him and she had told me stories about her and James all the time."  
  
"What I don't get is why you guys didn't just tell me about her," said Sirius.  
  
"James said that you would bug him about her."  
  
"Bug him?"  
  
"He said you'd ask him if she was hot, and if he did anything with her, and blah blah blah. He said he didn't wanna hafta explain that they were just friends," said Vinny.  
  
Sirius opened his mouth to object but then laughed. "He's probably right."  
  
They continued walking for awhile and then Vinny asked, "So, just friends, huh?"  
  
"That's right, Krum."  
  
"When have you ever been 'just friends' with a girl?"  
  
"Since her," he answered shortly.  
  
Vinny smiled and looked sideways at his friend. "You got it bad, Sirius."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You like her," stated Vinny.  
  
"I think I'm in love with her," he replied, glumly.  
  
"And she has no idea, does she?" asked Vinny, wisely.  
  
"Of course she doesn't. What should I do?"  
  
"Make a move. That's all you can do. It's what I did. We were friends ever since our first year, and I finally told her I liked her at the beginning of our fifth."  
  
"I don't wanna lose her though. I'd rather have her as just a friend, than not have her at all."  
  
"Of course you would. But she's not the type to let you liking her get in the way of your friendship. It might be weird for you, but she's around guys that like her all the time. You'll just hafta get over it if she doesn't like you back."  
  
"I don't know if I could stand it."  
  
"C'mon! We're talkin about the legendary Sirius Black here! Sirius Black has never been turned down by a girl!"  
  
"Raven turned me down the first day I met her, actually."  
  
"Oh. then you're in trouble," teased Vinny.  
  
"Oh, thanks a lot!" Sirius laughed. "Oh, I better get back down there and wait for her. She doesn't know where she's going." Raven got the papers signed and the rest of the day they spent with Vinny in the REC room, stopping only to eat lunch and dinner.  
  
"Ready to defend your title?" asked Vinny as he walked over to a speed hockey game and picked up the flat puck, twirling it around his fingers.  
  
"You ready to lose?" asked Sirius, winking at Raven out of the corner of his eye. He got up and pulled Raven along with him, striding over to the air hockey table. "Watch this, Ray, I am the king."  
  
Raven looked at him skeptically. "You can cheer," he said.  
  
Raven shrugged. "Kick his ass, Vin!"  
  
Sirius scowled. "Traitor. Watch and see me win."  
  
"Now, Sirius, you should know me better than that by now. I was never and watch and see kinda girl. I'm playing winner," Raven stated.  
  
"You don't know what you're getting yourself into," warned Sirius.  
  
Sirius ended up beating Vinny of course, 10 to 6. "Haven't lost my touch, have I Vinchenso?"  
  
"Yeah, yeah. I never was much good at it. Raven'll get ya for me, " he said, rubbing Raven's shoulders and giving her a little pep talk, lowering his voice so Sirius couldn't hear. "Okay, all you gotta do is psych him out. You stuff him once and he'll lose his thunder, got it? Now, he always hits the puck way to his right side, so if you can volley it back right away, go for his left side and it should be wide open. You're faster than me, you can do it."  
  
"Thanks, coach," said Raven, eyeing Sirius and smiling at him.  
  
"You sure you wanna do this?" he asked.  
  
"Don't hold back," she said as he hit the puck and she blocked it. He hit towards her again, hard from his right, so she sent it back on his left and into the slot. "Are you sure you wanna do this?"  
  
"I let you have that one," he said.  
  
"No! You don't get to say that! I'm not playing you unless you give me your word right now that you're gonna bring it. That way when I beat you, I'll know it's because I'm better," said Raven.  
  
"I'll bring it."  
  
"Good."  
  
Raven beat the crap out of Sirius. She won 10 to 2. Sirius said it was because whenever she hit the puck he could see down her shirt and it was distracting him, but she won fair and square. The Hogwarts Express came at 8 to take them back home and they were almost sad to leave.  
  
Vinny pulled Raven into a hug. "You can't leave now! You just came back into my life!"  
  
"Come with us," she begged.  
  
"I can't. See ya, Sirius," he said, hugging him.  
  
Sirius was silent on the way back, thinking about what Vinny told him to do.  
  
"You okay?" asked Raven.  
  
"Fine. Just tired."  
  
"Me too," said Raven, yawning. Sirius took her head and laid it on his shoulder, putting his arm around her. After a few minutes she was asleep.  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	15. Chapter 15

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
A/N: I ALREADY HAD THIS CHAPTER HALFWAY WRITTEN WHEN I REALIZED THAT THERE WAS A FLAW. SO INSTEAD OF RE-WRITING THIS WHOLE CHAPTER, I JUST CHANGED A FEW MINOR THINGS IN CHAPTER 14, SO YOU MIGHT WANNA GO BACK AND READ IT OVER AGAIN IF YOU HAVEN'T JUST READ IT BEFORE THIS CHAPTER. SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE. 3 RAVEN  
  
Chapter 15 - October 6th  
  
Raven woke up in her bed and looked around, wondering how she had gotten there. She got in the shower and then went down to breakfast. She found the rest of the gang already there and sat down next to Remus.  
  
"Morning, Sunshine," said Sirius, who was sitting across from her. "I've just been telling the boys about our little threesome with Vinny last night."  
  
"Is that what happened? I don't even remember how I got back into my bed," she said.  
  
"I carried you. You fell asleep on the train and you refused to wake up," explained Sirius.  
  
"Well thanks... I mean, thanks for not putting my pajamas on for me, too."  
  
"Oh, believe me, I wanted to," he admitted.  
  
"I would have skinned you alive," she warned.  
  
"Skin?" he teased.  
  
"Shut it!"  
  
"So you saw Vin, huh? How is he?" asked James.  
  
"Oh, he's great. Told him he should come visit sometime," answered Raven.  
  
"He finally get over you?" asked James.  
  
"What are you talkin about?" she inquired.  
  
"He was still in love with you when he left," he said.  
  
"I know that! I was still in love with him, too!" said Raven.  
  
"You guys were in love? I didn't know it was that serious!" exclaimed Sirius.  
  
"Yep," Raven had finished eating. Guys, I'm gonna go back up to my room and do my Transfiguration crap quick."  
  
"Oh. we did ours last night," said Lily.  
  
"Sirius?" asked Raven.  
  
Sirius scoffed. "I don't need to look at that rubbish. I know it all!" Raven rose her eyebrows at him and he got up and followed her out of the Great Hall.  
  
Raven got out her book and sat down on her bed. Sirius followed. "So, you guys were really in love?"  
  
"I guess so. What the heck did that mean?" Raven mimicked James, "'He finally get over you?'"  
  
"Raven, Raven, Raven, listen to me. You're the kind of girl that's beautiful and doesn't know it or the kind of girl who's smart and doesn't believe it. You're the kind of girl that guys don't get over, that's why you're still good friends with every guy you've ever gone out with. Because they can't stand not having you in their life!"  
  
"Is that a compliment?" she asked, confused.  
  
"I don't know. Anyway, back to Vinny. Did you have sex with him?" he blurted out. "I mean, of course you didn't! You were only fourteen, right?"  
  
"Er. fifteen," she answered.  
  
Sirius' mouth dropped open. "So you did? Holy shit! Raven, you lost it to Vinny Krum?" Raven said nothing. "How is it possible that I didn't find out about this?"  
  
"Believe it or not, Sirius, I'm not stupid, so I haven't told you every juicy detail about my life yet."  
  
"Yet! .You will!" he said. "So, who else have you done it with?"  
  
"Kiss my ass!" she responded.  
  
"Don't think I know him."  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "I'm not telling you anything!"  
  
"Oh yes you are! I'll tell you all the girls I've been with," bribed Sirius.  
  
"I don't have all night, Padfoot. I hafta get my Transfiguration done."  
  
Sirius scoffed. "Well, for the record, I'm not like that anymore, okay?"  
  
"Yeah, you've said that like five times in the past two days. What's with that?"  
  
"I don't know. You did it with Justin, didn't you?" asked Sirius, hoping to catch her off guard.  
  
"No! Stop asking me! I'm not telling you!" yelled Raven.  
  
"Fine," Sirius opened his Transfiguration book and started flipping through the pages. "What about Spike?"  
  
"Sirius, that's enough!" she said, pushing him off the bed.  
  
"Ah! What do you want from me?" he said, standing back up.  
  
"I want you to shut up about it!" she hollered.  
  
"And I want you to fall madly in love with me right now, but." Sirius trailed off, realizing what he had just said. He had been running it through his head what he was going to say to her, but he didn't plan on saying that.  
  
"Wait, what did you just say? It sounded like you just said-"  
  
"I did."  
  
Raven got off the bed and started pacing her room. This was one of Sirius' tricks, and she was going to play along. "Why would you need me to be in love with you? Every other girl in this school already is!" she reasoned.  
  
"But you're the only one that I actually want, and it drives me crazy!" he decided to just come out with it.  
  
Raven spun around. "What?"  
  
"You heard me, Rave," he took a step closer to her.  
  
Raven hesitated. ".What do you want me to say to this?"  
  
"Tell me you feel the same way," he said, quickly.  
  
"I. I." Raven's eyes darted around the room, searching for an answer. "I don't know, Sirius. I mean, I did like you for a while. but then I kinda just told myself not to anymore. I thought we were gonna be just friends."  
  
"I can't handle it. I tried, but I can't. Every little thing you do makes me want you even more. The more you insult me, the more I want you."  
  
"Don't say things like that!" said Raven, putting her hands over her face and massaging her temples.  
  
"Why not?" asked Sirius, defiantly.  
  
"It makes me feel uncomfortable!" she justified.  
  
He took another step towards her so that they were only a few inches between them and brought his head down to her level. "Is this making you uncomfortable?"  
  
Raven just stared at him, not knowing what to say.  
  
"Okay, I'm gonna kiss you now, Ray," he said. Raven quickly looked at the ground. "And if you don't want me to." he paused, put his index finger to her chin, lifted her head back up to him, and looked deep into her eyes. He spoke softly, ".well, then you're just gonna hafta stop me."  
  
Sirius moved his hand up to Raven's cheek and leaned in to kiss her. Raven closed her eyes and let his lips touch hers. After a few seconds, she parted her lips for his tongue and their kiss became more passionate. Raven reached her arms around Sirius' neck, pulling him closer. Then Raven pulled away.  
  
She was out of breath and smiling up at Sirius as she said, "We should have done that a long time ago."  
  
Sirius laughed, "Yeah. C'mon, we can make up for lost time right now," he said as he pulled her towards him again.  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER... WELL???? DID THE KISS LIVE UP TO YOUR EXPECTATIONS? IT FINALLY HAPPENED, DID YOU LIKE IT? I AM SO NERVOUS CUZ I WANTED IT TO BE PERFECT. THAT'S WHY I KEPT PUTTING IT OFF, SO I'M SORRY. PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK. THANK YOU. OH, AND JUST REMINDING YOU GUYS, THAT IF YOU HAVEN'T CHECKED OUT MY AOL HOMEPAGE AND YOU LOVE SIRIUS AS MUCH AS I DO, YOU SHOULD! YOU HAFTA CLICK ON MY AUTHOR INFO IN ORDER TO GET THE LINK CUZ THIS DAMN WEBSITE WON'T LET ME PUT IT ON HERE, K? 3 RAVEN 


	16. Chapter 16

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Why Don't You And I" by Santana featuring Chad Kroeger.  
  
Chapter 16 - October 7th  
  
Raven was lying awake in her bed. She glanced at the clock. It was two- thirty and she couldn't stop thinking about Sirius. Her doorway slid open and Sirius walked over to her bed.  
  
"Rave?" he whispered. She patted the empty space of the bed next to her and he climbed in, pulling up the covers and laid facing her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up."  
  
"I was awake," she said, yawning. "Couldn't sleep."  
  
"Me either. Tell me it wasn't all a dream," he said, hopefully.  
  
A smile spread across Raven's face and she leaned in and kissed him. "Does that answer your question?"  
  
"Well... not really," he teased. "Do you think you could explain it a bit more?"  
  
Raven laughed. "God, how thick are you?"  
  
After a few minutes of kissing, they both settled back down and sighed at the same time. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked Sirius.  
  
"If you're thinking 'How are we gonna tell everybody?' then yeah."  
  
"Mm-hmm. They aren't gonna believe us."  
  
"I know. James is gonna be pissed! We finally convinced them that we didn't like each other and now we do."  
  
"Well... I liked you from the start," said Sirius. "Why do you think I haven't been with anyone since you came here?"  
  
"What? Jesus Christ, Padfoot! Why didn't you just tell me? I liked you the whole time, too!"  
  
"You did not! You were the one that kept insisting we were just friends!"  
  
"That's because James was breathing down my neck about liking you, and I didn't want to admit he was right! Plus, you acted like you were fine with just being friends!"  
  
"Yeah, that's because I thought you wanted to just be friends!"  
  
"Okay, so we're both pretty thick," stated Raven.  
  
"Yeah, I guess. So what are we gonna do about this?"  
  
"I don't know, but I'm really not looking forward to telling them. They're gonna give us so much shit."  
  
"Well, we could just keep it a secret for a while," suggested Sirius.  
  
"Could we? I don't know; I tell James everything. Maybe just for a while, until we get comfortable with the whole idea. Cuz I mean, why bother to tell them if we're just gonna break up right away, ya know?" Sirius gave her a confused look. "No, not that we will or anything, I just mean... you know, we fight nonstop and-"  
  
Sirius put his finger to her lip to stop her from talking. "And I kinda like it."  
  
Raven giggled. "Me too. Okay, so we're scamming them again, but this time it's the opposite."  
  
"Yep."  
  
"So... you probably better get back or they'll wonder what you're up to, huh?"  
  
"Well, they were all sleeping when I left."  
  
"Oh good." She reached over and turned on the radio and "Why Don't You And I" was on and they sat listening to it.  
  
"Since the moment I spotted you, like walkin round with little wings on my shoes. My stomach spilled with the butterflies. Ooh, and it's alright. Bouncing round from cloud to cloud, I got this feeling like I'm never gonna come down. If I said I didn't like it, then you'd know I'd lied. Every time I try to talk to you, I get tongue-tied. It turns out that everything I say to you comes out wrong and never comes out right. So I say why don't you and I get together. We'll take on the world and be together forever. Heads we will, and tails we'll try again. So I say why don't you and I hold each other. We'll fly to the moon and straight on to heaven. Cuz without you they're never gonna let me in."  
  
Sirius laughed as he listened to the lyrics. "I like this song. It kinda describes us." "Yeah, it's pretty," Raven said, turning up the volume. They laid next to each other listening to the words in silence until they fell asleep.  
  
Raven moaned and opened her eyes. She jumped as Sirius came into focus, lying on his side and facing her, still asleep. She quickly looked down and, seeing that they were both fully clothed, breathed a sigh of relief. She tried to roll over on her back, but she was attached; Sirius was holding her hand and she didn't want to wake him up. 'Okay, I'll roll over on my back and then slide off the bed,' she thought. She slowly twisted her hand out of his and little by little rolled onto her back. She was almost off the bed when Sirius, still sleeping, moaned and reached his hand out across Raven's chest, landing on her right breast. She froze. 'Oh my God, if he knew what he was doing right now I'd kick his ass! What am I gonna do now?' She steadily continued to roll off the bed, leaving Sirius' hand to fall back to the bed as she landed on the floor and looked at the clock. 'Holy shit! Seven o'clock, I gotta wake him up!' But as she was thinking this, Sirius moaned again and lifted his head from the pillow. He turned slowly to look at her and smiled.  
  
"Hi," he said, simply.  
  
"Hi," Raven replied coldly as she thought, 'I swear to God he knows what he just did.'  
  
"Why're you over there?" he asked.  
  
"Because I didn't want to wake you up."  
  
"You sleep alright?"  
  
"Actually yes. With you in my bed even; I'm amazed."  
  
"And I'm amazed I spent an entire night with you in my arms, and I didn't even cop a feel," he grinned.  
  
'He knows.' thought Raven, raising her eyebrows at him.  
  
"Well... maybe one," he winked at her.  
  
"You son of a bitch! You were awake the whole time!" she yelled, jumping back on the bed and punching him lightly in the stomach.  
  
"Ow! Hey! I was half asleep. I swear to God I didn't fully enjoy it!" he said.  
  
"Shut your mouth, you're not helping!"  
  
Sirius glanced over at the clock. "Oh shit! I forgot to go back up to bed," he said, jumping up.  
  
"Yeah, that's right! Get the hell out!" shouted Raven.  
  
"Dammit! What am I supposed to say if they're awake?"  
  
"Tell them..." she thought for a minute, "tell them you had to go to the bathroom and... and you ate something weird... and you couldn't stop shitting!"  
  
Sirius threw his head back and let out a bark-like laugh. "I just love how your mind works in the morning," he said as he put his hands around Raven's face and kissed her.  
  
"Did they catch you?" whispered Raven into Sirius' ear at breakfast.  
  
Sirius shook his head and spoke out of the corner of his mouth. "I'll get you back your cloak later."  
  
"Keep it. You might need it tonight."  
  
Sirius smiled wide and turned to look at her, raising his eyebrows twice. "Who do we play on Saturday?" asked Peter.  
  
"Slytherin, you idiot!" yelled James. "Gryffindor always plays them the first game of the season."  
  
"Duh, Wormtail," said Remus.  
  
Sirius sighed. "Another day of boring classes. Do we ever get to have fun?"  
  
"Full moon's coming," said James, nudging Remus.  
  
"I'm so glad you're looking forward to it, Prongs," he replied.  
  
"Let's go piss off the Slytherins before classes start," suggested Sirius.  
  
"Better yet, let's go piss on the Slytherins!" joked Raven. At this, Lily spit out her pumpkin juice and the entire gang erupted into laughter.  
  
After dinner, Lily grabbed Raven up from the table and proclaimed, "We are going to the library to do that potions essay."  
  
"Wait, I'll come," said Sirius, getting up. Raven saw Lily give Sirius a suspicious look and nodded for him to sit back down.  
  
"Girl talk, Siri. You understand. Catch up with you guys later," said Raven, being pulled away by Lily.  
  
"Alright, spill," said Lily as they sat down at their favorite table by the window in the library.  
  
"Spill what?" asked Raven, innocently.  
  
"You've been staring at Sirius all day long."  
  
"I have not!"  
  
"Yeah, you have, Raven. I swear to God, this is the last time I ever ask you this question, all right? But you hafta promise to tell me the truth." Raven rolled her eyes. She knew what the question was. "Do you like Sirius?"  
  
Raven sighed and looked Lily in the eye. She couldn't lie to her best friend. "Yes."  
  
Lily's eyes widened and she smiled. "And does he like you?"  
  
Raven nodded. "Lily, please don't tell anyone yet!"  
  
"How long has this been going on?" asked Lily, her eyes brimming with excitement.  
  
"Just since last night, I swear to God."  
  
"And?... Tell me everything!"  
  
"First, promise you won't say anything to anybody yet, especially not James, Lil."  
  
"But why?"  
  
"Cuz it just happened! We wanna figure out what's going on for ourselves before we tell everyone else. Promise?"  
  
"Okay. But you're gonna hafta tell them eventually," reasoned Lily.  
  
"I know, we will."  
  
"So, how did it happen?" asked Lily, scooting to the edge of her chair.  
  
"He basically asked me if I liked him and then he kissed me."  
  
Lily practically interrupted her, "-Is he a good kisser?"  
  
Raven rolled her eyes, smiled, and looked up at the ceiling, biting her bottom lip. "He's unbelievable."  
  
Lily giggled with glee. "So, is that all you've done with him so far?"  
  
"God, no! We've already done it three times! He's good, too," said Raven, casually.  
  
"WHAT?" yelled Lily.  
  
Raven started laughing. "Jesus, I'm kidding! I've only been with him for like twelve hours!"  
  
Lily breathed a sigh of relief. "You scared me!"  
  
"Sorry, couldn't resist. So, what about you and James?"  
  
"What do you mean? Of course we haven't had sex! I don't wanna get pregnant!" Lily screeched.  
  
Raven laughed. "Lily, the chances of you getting pregnant your first time are slim to none if you use protection."  
  
"Well, I don't know! I'm definitely not ready for that yet."  
  
"So have you done anything?"  
  
"Well, we kiss and stuff," answered Lily.  
  
"With tongue, right?"  
  
Lily blushed. "Yes... it's nice."  
  
Raven giggled. "You know, it's been a while; I'm just gonna take your word on that."  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	17. Chapter 17

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Chapter 17 - October 8th  
  
He was waiting in the supply closet for her to go by. Seeing her alone, he quickly opened the door a crack, pulled her in, and, before she knew what was going on, was kissing her deeply.  
  
Raven pushed him away. "That had better be you, Sirius Black," she said into the darkness.  
  
"Sirius? It's me, Snivelly!" he joked.  
  
Raven hit him across the chest before pulling him back into a kiss.  
  
"Sorry for jumping you, ya know, it's just I couldn't get away last night and I missed you."  
  
"I missed you, too," said Raven, slyly, beckoning him towards her with her finger.  
  
The bell rang suddenly and they split apart at once. "Fuck!" they both said in unison. Sirius stuck his head out the closet door and into the empty hallway. "Coast's clear, let's go," he said, taking Raven's hand and pulling her behind him. They walked into the Charms classroom, and luckily, it had not started yet. People were still talking and taking their seats. Raven and Sirius sat down at their table with the rest of the gang. Lily gave Raven a knowing look and a wink. Raven stepped on her foot.  
  
"Ouch!" she yelled.  
  
"What?" asked James.  
  
"N-nothing. Stubbed by toe on the desk," lied Lily.  
  
Flitwick stepped onto his pile of books and began to call the class to order. "Now, now, now, students. Thank you. We will be practicing the Illusionment and Disillusionment Charms today. I will split you into pairs so that you can practice doing them. Right then, Mr. Potter, Ms. Evans. Mr. Lupin, Ms. Starck. Mr. Black, Ms. McKinnon."  
  
Sirius cracked a smile and looked sideways at Raven. "Raven's free to disillusion me anytime!"  
  
James and Remus laughed, pretend-punching Sirius in each arm. ".I don't get it, Lil," said Peter, to Lily.  
  
"I do," said Lily, smiling at Raven.  
  
James tried to explain to Peter. "Every time they get partnered up, Sirius goes into pick-up line mode.  
  
Sirius turned and pretended to see Raven for the first time. "Haven't we met before?"  
  
Raven smiled, deviously. "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic," she said as she rapped him hard over the head to disillusion him.  
  
James and Lily chuckled as they disillusioned each other.  
  
Sirius hand went to the top of his head. "Hey! You don't hafta do it that hard! And I don't have V.D., dammit! Do I really deserve this abuse, Prongs?" he asked, turning to James and Raven forcefully tapped his head again, bringing Sirius back to normal.  
  
"I think you deserve worse, Padfoot."  
  
Sirius quickly turned back around and looked at Raven. "Did you just grab my ass?"  
  
Raven shook her head, innocently.  
  
"Damn!" he said, looking let down.  
  
"Must have been Flitwick," teased Raven.  
  
Then Sirius lowered his voice and moved away from James and Lily. "Okay, why is Lily giving you those looks and acting like she knows what's going on?"  
  
"Because she does."  
  
"What?" yelled Sirius. James and Lily looked over at them.  
  
"Oh, I said, uh, can I have a picture of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?" explained Raven, hastily.  
  
"Good one!" said Sirius, rapping Raven's head. Then he lowered his voice again. "You told her?"  
  
"Well, not exactly! I mean, she tortured me and then she guessed what it was."  
  
Sirius scoffed as Raven continued. "She already knew. She could tell something was up, and the rest of them will figure it out, too."  
  
"Well, yeah, when she tells them!" he said through gritted teeth, lifting the disillusionment charm on her.  
  
"She's not gonna tell them. I made her promise. But I also promised her we'd tell everyone soon."  
  
"We will," Sirius' rage softened. "Trust me. I wanna be able to kiss you whenever I want."  
  
Raven brought her face right up to his. "Like now, for example?"  
  
"Yes, now would be nice," he said, looking down at her and smiling.  
  
She rapped him over the head again and moved away muttering, "Patience is a virtue."  
  
"Raven! Black! Potter! Quiddich practice tonight. Don't be late!" warned Wood, passing the gang in the library.  
  
"We won't," said the three of them together, unenthusiastically.  
  
"Guys, I have an idea," said Raven as the three of them joined Lily, Peter, and Remus, who was very pale, at their table in the library. "Well, I was thinking if we win the game this weekend, we could go up to my cottage to sort of celebrate."  
  
"Your cottage? The one on the lake?" asked James, his eyes brimming with excitement.  
  
"Yeah. It was left to my uncle when my parents died, and he decided to keep it. It's only like an hour away from here. We could go swimming, jetskiing, boating, skiing, tubing, ya know?"  
  
"Oh my God! You have a jetski?" asked Sirius, dropping the book he was balancing on his head and earning a reprieving look from Madam Pince.  
  
"I have three jetskiis," said Raven, lovingly.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes and smiled dreamily. "Let's go right now then."  
  
"That would be perfect! Plus, Dumbledore always gives the first Monday after Quiddich starts off!" said Remus as some of the color returned to his face.  
  
"Yeah, that would be great!" agreed Lily.  
  
"Pete?" they all turned to Peter and asked him.  
  
"Of course."  
  
Remus got up from the table and said that he need to do some charms homework from the night before. As he slowly retreated out of the library, Raven watched Sirius and James wink at each other from the corner of her eye.  
  
Sirius noticed Raven looking at them strangely and tried to distract her. "Hey, Raven, do you have a library card? Cuz I wanna check you out!"  
  
Raven rolled her eyes but smiled at Sirius. "Wow, Sirius, you're so sweet," said Raven, sarcastically.  
  
"Well it's easy to be sweet when you're talkin to sugar!" he continued without even having to think. Then a kid walked by with a laptop computer and everyone stared at him. "Aren't those for muggles?"  
  
"I have one in my room. It's a good way to talk to people when you can't use magic," said Raven.  
  
"Wanna come see my hard drive?" Sirius winked at Raven.  
  
"What, you mean your three and a half inch floppy?" retorted Raven.  
  
Sirius just stared at her for a second. "Damn! How'd you think of that? C'mon! You can't ever just let me have a good pick up line, can ya?"  
  
"You've never seriously used one of those hoping to get laid, have you?"  
  
"No, Raven, I'm kidding! I just know a lot of them cuz I think they're funny. I thought you did, too," said Sirius, pretending to be offended.  
  
"I do! They're funny! It's just they're terrible! I'm gonna go to bed, guys. I'm tired," said Raven, gathering up her stuff.  
  
"Was it something I said?" asked Sirius as Raven left for the Gryffindor common room.  
  
Raven went into her room and a few minutes later the portrait opened and Sirius walked in. "Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?"  
  
Raven laughed as she wandered up to Sirius and threw her arms around his neck. Sirius looked down at her. "If you don't like the pick up lines, all you gotta do is say the word and I'll stop."  
  
"You're the one who doesn't like it when I actually have a response to them," said Raven, returning his gaze.  
  
"Actually, I love it. I just pretend not to."  
  
"And I just pretend your lines don't work on me." Raven rose her eyebrows twice.  
  
"Really? They do?"  
  
Raven pressed her lips to Sirius's. "They make me laugh."  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE REVIEW! THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE UP VERY SOON. I BET YOU CAN GUESS WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN. 


	18. Chapter 18

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Chapter 18 - October 8th  
  
Sirius got up quietly from Raven's bed and glanced at the clock. 'Shit, it's almost ten!' he thought to himself. He was lucky. Raven had just fallen asleep a few minutes ago. He'd better be quiet. He slowly snuck out of her room and up to the boys' dorms where James and Peter were waiting for him.  
  
"Where ya been, Sirius?" asked James as he came in the door.  
  
"Fell asleep in the library," lied Sirius. He hated lying to James.  
  
"Well, let's go!" Peter's face was filled with excitement.  
  
Sirius led the way back out of the dorm, with James and Peter with him under the invisibility cloak. They came to the entrance hall and he slowly opened the door so it would not creak. They crept along the grass and when they came to the Whomping Willow that was thrashing about, Peter transformed, slipped under the branches and prodded the knot on the trunk. The tree froze, and the marauders slipped into the hole that had opened at the base. Once inside the hole, James threw off the invisibility cloak and transformed into Prongs. Sirius transformed beside him and the rat, deer, and dog continued along the path that would lead them to the Shrieking Shack.  
  
(A/N: JUST SO YOU KNOW, IF THE MARAUDERS ARE IN THEIR ANIMAGII FORM, I'LL REFER TO THEM BY THEIR MARAUDER NAMES (MOONY, WORMTAIL, PADFOOT, OR PRONGS). YOU'LL KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BECAUSE ALTHOUGH THE CHARACTERS CALL EACH OTHER BY THEIR MARAUDER NAMES ALL THE TIME, I ALWAYS CALL THEM BY THEIR FIRST NAME IF THEY'RE SPEAKING OR I'M REFERRING TO THEM. IN CASE YOU DON'T KNOW, JAMES TRANSFORMS INTO A DEER SO HIS MARAUDER NAME IS PRONGS. SIRIUS TRANSFORMS INTO A DOG, SO HIS MARAUDER NAME IS PADFOOT. PETER TRANSFORMS INTO A RAT, SO HIS MARAUDER NAME IS WORMTAIL. MOONY IS A WEREWOLF, SO HIS MARAUDER NAME IS MOONY. YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS, OTHERWISE, I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE READING THIS FANFIC, BUT JUST IN CASE! ALSO, I THINK THAT ALL ANIMAGII WHILE IN THEIR ANIMAGUS FORM CAN ALL TALK TO OTHER ANIMAGII IN THEIR ANIMAGUS FORM. THEREFORE, WHEN IN THEIR MARAUDER FORM, MOONY, WORMTAIL, PADFOOT, AND PRONGS WILL ALL TALK TO EACH OTHER LIKE NORMAL, BUT ONLY OTHER ANIMAGII WILL BE ABLE TO HEAR THEM. IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS, PLEASE ASK! 3 RAVEN)  
  
The path suddenly angled upward and soon Padfoot was nudging a door open at the top. They were now on the first floor of the Shrieking Shack. They continued up the stairs and were met at the top by their best friend and ferocious beast, Moony. Moony growled at them at first, but then his werewolf eyes softened as he recognized the animals.  
  
"Ready for some fun?" asked Padfoot.  
  
"Not yet," said Moony. "I need to rest awhile." He wandered back into the room he had come out of and jumped up on the bed, walking around for a few seconds, and then settling down. Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs all followed him into the room and settled themselves on the floor around the bed.  
  
"So what are we doing tonight?" asked Prongs, curled up at the foot of the bed.  
  
Padfoot rolled over onto his back and scratched his ear with his foot. "We could always terrorize the centaurs in the Forbidden Forest or find a woman for Wormtail in the cave beyond The Three Broomsticks," he teased.  
  
Wormtail's rat face lit up. "Yeah!"  
  
Moony, Prongs, and Padfoot laughed. "I meant a rat woman, Wormtail. How thick could you get?"  
  
Wormtail pondered this for a moment. Moony suddenly became alert and stood up on the bed, sniffing the air. His werewolf eyes seemed to glass over and fill with danger.  
  
The door opened slowly and all four animals stared at the empty hallway. Then Raven pulled off the cloak and threw it to the ground. She crossed her arms and rose her eyebrows at the animals that she knew were her friends. "Honestly, boys, did you think I wasn't going to figure out your big secret?"  
  
Moony had remained still on the bed, trying to fight off the wolf, until now. As Padfoot shouted for Raven to get out and realized she couldn't understand him, Moony bounded off the bed after Raven. He lunged at her as Padfoot and Prongs threw themselves onto the werewolf's back, trying to pull him away from her, but there was no need. Raven was gone.  
  
"What the-" Padfoot looked around for Raven and saw the only thing that could be her, a small red fox, standing at the other end of the room.  
  
"Raven?" asked Prongs.  
  
"No, it's Dumbledore, and you're all in deep shit!" she answered him sarcastically.  
  
Moony moved towards her cautiously and sniffed. The fox cocked her head downwards to show him that she was a friend. The werewolf accepted this gesture and relaxed beside her.  
  
"Why didn't you tell us?" asked Padfoot.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me?" the fox asked.  
  
"Because you would have told Lily and Lily being the perfect student she is, would have told Dumbledore."  
  
"I wouldn't have told Lily!" protested the fox.  
  
Padfoot barked for a laugh. "How stupid do you think I am?"  
  
"So, a fox, huh?" asked Moony.  
  
"How stupid is there?" the fox retorted to Padfoot.  
  
Padfoot growled at her. "I suppose you think we're gonna give you a Marauder name now?"  
  
"Of course we are, Padfoot. Either she joins us, or we'll hafta kill her," joked Prongs.  
  
"Are you registered?" asked Wormtail.  
  
"Of course not! I stumbled across the animagus potion when I was fourteen."  
  
"Oh good, we aren't either," said Wormtail, delighted at what he considered his own cleverness.  
  
"I know, I looked you up," said the fox, offhandedly.  
  
"What? How long have you known?" asked Padfoot, slightly hurt that he hadn't known anything about it.  
  
"Quite a while."  
  
"So, what'll it be, guys?" asked Prongs.  
  
"What'll what be?" Peter asked him.  
  
"Raven's Marauder name, Wormtail."  
  
They all started tossing around names. They continued for half an hour and no one had come up with anything really good that one of them didn't disagree with.  
  
"Raven, you always come up with the good ideas here, you think of one!" said James, out of exasperation.  
  
"I am not thinking of my own Marauder name, thank you. You're on your own," replied the fox.  
  
"Okay, I have two ideas," said Padfoot, finally. "Vulpix or Minx."  
  
"Vulpix?"  
  
"Yeah, wasn't there a fox Pokemon named Vulpix?" he explained.  
  
Prongs cocked his head and thought for a minute. "Oh yeah. That's good, Padfoot!"  
  
"Well, what's a minx?" asked Wormtail.  
  
"It's a word, Peter," responded Padfoot shortly.  
  
The fox answered him. "It means a girl who's kind of daring and-"  
  
"Smart ass," supplied Padfoot.  
  
"Spirited," finished the fox.  
  
"Yeah, that definitely fits Raven, too," said James.  
  
"So what'll it be?" asked the fox.  
  
The Marauders decided to think on it.  
  
A/N: SO WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK IT SHOULD BE??? HELP ME DECIDE, PLEASE! I THOUGHT OF VULPIX A LONG TIME AGO WHEN I WAS PLAYING POKEMON. BUT THEN I WAS WATCHING PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN AND CAME UP WITH MINX. THE DICTIONARY SAYS MINX MEANS "A PERT GIRL, A WANTON WOMAN" SO IF YOU WANT A BETTER IDEA OF THE WORD, LOOK UP SYNONYMS OF PERT. I WAS KIND OF LEANING TOWARD MINX BECAUSE IT FLOWS BETTER AND IT SAYS MORE ABOUT RAVEN AS A CHARACTER, BUT VULPIX SAYS MORE ABOUT HER BEING A FOX. I DON'T KNOW!!!! PLEASE, TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK. NEXT CHAPTER IS QUIDDICH! 


	19. Chapter 19

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Chapter 19 - October 21st  
  
"And there's another 10 points to Gryffindor. James Potter, everyone," Remus said into the microphone, as commentator for the Quiddich match. "And- oh, look at Raven! Newest player for Gryffindor, Raven McKinnon's just gone into a straight dive, and. oh, that was a close one! McKinnon was nearly knocked off her broom by a bludger from Malfoy. Oh, that'll teach him! Gryffindor beater, Sirius Black, retaliates a bludger at Malfoy's broom, cracking it in half. Raven's still after the snitch. Slytherin's seeker is trying desperately to catch up, but so far he's eating her dust. She's getting closer. closer. closer. SHE'S GOT IT! IT'S OVER, FOLKS! RAVEN MCKINNON CATCHES THE SNITCH! GRYFFINDOR WINS 220 TO 30!"  
  
"God, Padfoot, are you as good in bed as you are at Quiddich?" teased Raven as they were all bringing their bags down to the common room, getting ready to leave for Raven's cottage.  
  
"Better!"  
  
"Yeah," she replied, rolling her eyes at him.  
  
"Man, we were awesome, weren't we?" asked James.  
  
"Truly," agreed Remus.  
  
"How're we getting to your cottage, Ray?" asked Lily.  
  
"My uncle had it connected by floo."  
  
"Oh, good!"  
  
"Did you tell Dumbledore?" asked Peter.  
  
"Yep. We're all set," said Raven, picking up the floo powder.  
  
One by one they all arrived at Raven's cottage. "Wow. Nice," said Sirius.  
  
"Thanks. Let me give you the tour." Raven lead Sirius and Lily out of the living room where the fireplace was and into a bright blue room with a queen size bed. "This is my room."  
  
Sirius walked in a laid himself and his bag on the bed. "So, I'm in here, then?"  
  
"No, Lily is," she said, taking his bag and throwing it out into the hallway.  
  
"Hey!" he lunged after it. "There's valuable stuff in here!" He scooped it up off the floor.  
  
"Like what? Your little black book?" she teased.  
  
Sirius scoffed and pretended to be offended. "I threw that away when I met you."  
  
"Sure you did." She led them down the hall to the next bedroom, which had bunk beds. "Um. you guys can fight over the bunks, or the last room has a full bed, and then there's the futon on the porch."  
  
Sirius jumped up to the top bunk and proclaimed, "I like being on top!"  
  
"That's great, Sirius," said Raven. "I'll show you the lake." They went back into the hall and then into the living room again. Raven then led them into the porch and out onto the deck.  
  
"Wow, it's beautiful," said Lily as the lake came into view.  
  
"Not without one of those, it isn't," said Raven, pointing down to her purple and yellow jetski. They continued walking down the steps to the beach and out onto the dock. Remus, James, and Peter were waiting in the boat.  
  
"Wanna show them the lake?" asked James.  
  
"Sure she does!" said Sirius, lifting Raven into the boat.  
  
"Dammit, I hafta go get the keys!" she said, getting out of the boat and running back up the dock, into the house.  
  
Raven took them on a boat ride around the entire lake and when they got back they decided to go swimming. James ended up taking the bed underneath Sirius, Peter slept in the other bedroom, and Remus slept on the porch. "Cuz I'm closest to the fridge," he teased.  
  
They decided to order pizza and watch movies the rest of the night.  
  
"I swear, Smokey's pizza is the best damn pizza in the whole world!" yelled James as he stuffed his face.  
  
"Yeah, it's pretty good," agreed Sirius.  
  
"Pretty good?" said James and Raven at the same time, smiling.  
  
"I've eaten this pizza my whole life and it gets better every time, man," said James.  
  
"Whatever you say, dude," said Sirius.  
  
"I'm off to bed, guys," said Raven, getting up.  
  
"Want me to tuck you in?" asked Sirius.  
  
"I think I can handle it, Sirius."  
  
"C'mon. I'm sure James would let Lily sleep in his bed." James kicked him under the table. "Ow! What? You know you would." He started to sing, "James and Lily sittin in a tree, f-u-c-k-i-n-" James clapped a hand over his mouth.  
  
"Knock-it-off!" he yelled. Remus and Peter were trying desperately to keep from laughing.  
  
Sirius snapped out of it. "Sorry. I'm fine now."  
  
Shortly after Lily and Raven went to bed, the guys followed. Then someone shook Raven awake. "Wha... what?"  
  
"Ray?"  
  
"Sirius! Get the hell out! We're gonna get caught! James is a really light sleeper!"  
  
"But. kiss?" he whined.  
  
Raven sighed and kissed him. Lily cleared her throat and they broke apart. "Sorry, Lil."  
  
"I'm uh, gonna go. see a man about a horse," she said, getting up.  
  
Raven and Sirius looked at her in confusion.  
  
"It's what my dad always says when he has to make an excuse to leave!" she justified and went to the bathroom, leaving them alone.  
  
"Padfoot, you've gotta go! Go, go, go, go!"  
  
"Wanna go swimming?"  
  
"No! Are you crazy?" she screeched.  
  
"Yes. C'mon, let's go. I already got my suit on," he said.  
  
Raven sighed. "It is nice swimming in the dark.okay, but I'll meet you down there."  
  
"Yes! Okay, hurry up!" Sirius snuck quietly back out the door. Raven was getting her suit on when Lily came back into the room and stared at her.  
  
"He wants to go swimming," she said simply.  
  
"Oh my God, you are head over heels," teased Lily.  
  
"I know. We're gonna tell them soon, Lil."  
  
"Sure, fine, whatever," Lily said, winking at her friend.  
  
"Well, I'm gonna go. see a horse about a man," Raven said, smirking at Lily.  
  
Lily laughed quietly. Raven smiled and snuck out of the house.  
  
"Sirius? Is it cold?" she whispered when she got to the end of the dock.  
  
"I dunno, why don't you find out for me?" he said from behind her as he pushed her into the water.  
  
"Oh my God, you are so dead!" she laughed as her head came up out of the water.  
  
"So, is it cold?"  
  
"Huh? Oh, yeah. yeah, I'm getting a cramp," she whimpered as she sank back into the water. "Help." her head went under.  
  
Sirius stood there shivering. "Oh, c'mon, I don't wanna save you right now! Alright, but you better be worth it!" he said as he dove into the water. A few seconds later, his head popped back up. "Rave? Raven!" she was nowhere to be seen. "Dammit, where are you?" He suddenly started to panic, "Oh shit, Ray? Raven?" he started swimming around frantically.  
  
"Hey, a girl could drown waitin for you," she said, standing at the end of the dock.  
  
"McKinnon, I'm gonna kill you!" he said, breathing a sigh of relief.  
  
"So is James, cuz I think you woke him up with all that yelling," she shot back as she dove into the water.  
  
She pulled him under with her and planted a kiss on his lips.  
  
"Wet one," he said as they came up from the water.  
  
"If they catch us out here, we're dead."  
  
"Then at least I'll die happy," said Sirius in-between kisses.  
  
Raven pulled away. "Me too."  
  
Sirius smiled. "I think this is the happiest I've been in a long time. I don't hafta think about how much my family hates me when I'm with you."  
  
"Sirius, your family doesn't hate you!"  
  
"Yes, they do! And I hate them!"  
  
"I'm sure deep down you'd be sad if one of them died," reasoned Raven.  
  
"I never wanna see them again."  
  
Raven and Sirius were silent on their way back up to the house. They quickly changed back into their pajamas and fell asleep.  
  
Raven opened her eyes and looked around. Lily was already up. She could hear James and Sirius arguing about what movie to watch in the living room.  
  
"Fine! Pick whatever damn movie you want!" yelled James. "Lily, you wanna go for a walk?"  
  
"Okay," she said.  
  
"Can I come?" asked Peter. James sighed but agreed.  
  
Remus stuck his head in the doorway to Raven's room. "Morning."  
  
"Morning," Raven replied, smiling at him.  
  
He entered the room and sat down on the bed next to her. "Miss you lately," he said.  
  
"Really?" Raven asked.  
  
"Well, yeah. You been spendin a lot of time with Sirius, huh?"  
  
"Uh-oh. What does that mean?" asked Raven, sitting up in bed.  
  
"Oh, don't worry. I wouldn't dare accuse you guys of liking each other again. But I think I know why you're together a lot."  
  
"You do?"  
  
"Well, James is a little preoccupied with Lily. I've noticed it, too. And you and Sirius are feeling neglected, right?"  
  
"Well, I guess that's part of it... but that's not all of it." She decided to tell Remus. "Sirius and I-"  
  
Sirius cleared his throat as he stood in the doorway. Raven looked quickly at him and raised her eyebrows. Sirius shrugged. "Why not," he said as he joined them on the bed.  
  
You're right, Moony," continued Raven. "You always were right, but we just figured it out for ourselves."  
  
"Uh, what?"  
  
"We like each other," Sirius summed up.  
  
"Really?" Remus started to smile.  
  
"Yup." Raven and Sirius said together.  
  
Then his smile faded. "I don't believe you. Prove it."  
  
"Prove it?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Kiss her."  
  
Sirius raised his eyebrows and smiled. "Well, it's a dirty job..." He pulled her towards him and kissed her. They pulled away and looked sideways at Remus.  
  
"Well, seeing as Raven's not slapping you right now. How long?" asked Remus.  
  
"Just a few days," said Raven.  
  
"James is gonna freak," warned Remus.  
  
"We know. that's why we're not telling him yet," said Sirius.  
  
"What? Guys, I don't wanna be caught in the middle of this."  
  
"Remus, please? Just for a few more days," pleaded Raven.  
  
Remus sighed. "Alright. But the sooner you tell him, the better."  
  
"We know."  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! I ONLY GOT A FEW PEOPLE WHO TOLD ME WHICH MARAUDER NAME (VULPIX OR MINX) TO PICK, SO I PUT IT OFF FOR ANOTHER CHAPTER. PLEASE, IFYOU HAVEN'T TOLD ME YET, OR YOU JUST WANT TO REINFORCE YOUR POSITION, JUST PICK ONE AND TELL MY WHY YOU THINK IT'S BETTER FOR RAVEN! I REALLY CAN'T MAKE THIS DECISION BY MYSELF! ARG! HEHE, "ARG" I SOUND LIKE A PIRATE! OKAY, I'LL SHUT UP NOW. BY THE WAY, THANK YOU SO MUCH TO ALL MY REVIEWERS, ESPECIALLY THE FAITHFUL ONES WHO REVIEW EVERY CHAPTER. I REALLY COULDN'T WRITE WITHOUT YOUR SUPPORT. I'D ALSO LIKE TO THANK SIRIUS LEE BLACK, WHEREVER HE IS, BECAUSE HE IS MY INSPIRATION. LUV YOU GUYS! NEXT CHAP WILL BE UP SOON.OH, DID YOU WANT A HINT?? OKAY, LET'S SEE: SIRIUS + MUGGLE BEER = ????????? I DON'T KNOW, WE WILL FIND OUT! 


	20. Chapter 20

Marauder Mayhem  
  
A/N: GUYS, JUST SO YA KNOW, RAVEN IS THE GRYFFINDOR SEEKER AND JAMES IS A CHASER. A LONG TIME AGO, I HEARD THAT JAMES WAS CHASER, BUT THEN THE SORCERER'S STONE MOVIE CAME OUT AND IT SAID JAMES WAS A SEEKER. SO THEN I THOUGHT, "WHY WOULD JKR OKAY THAT IN THE MOVIE IF IT WASN'T TRUE?" BUT THEN I FOUND AN OLD INTERVIEW WITH HER THAT CONFIRMS JAMES AS A CHASER. SO, I HAD TO CHANGE THINGS AROUND. I CHANGED THE LAST CHAPTER AND A FEW OTHER CHAPTERS THAT MENTION IT. YOU DON'T HAFTA READ THEM OVER, I WAS JUST LETTING YOU KNOW SO YOU DON'T GET CONFUSED THE NEXT TIME THEY'RE PLAYIN QUIDDICH. RAVEN IS THE SEEKER, JAMES IS A CHASER, SIRIUS IS A BEATER. GOT IT???  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Man, I Feel Like A Woman" by Shania Twain AND "Paradise City" by Guns N Roses.  
  
Chapter 20 - October 22nd  
  
"The best thing about bein a woman," sang Sirius and Peter loudly, while James and Remus laughed their asses off. "Is their prerogative to have a little fun and. Oh-oh-oh, totally crazy, forget I'm a lady. Men's shirts, short skirts, oh-oh-oh. Really go wild, yeah, doin it in style. Oh-oh-oh, get in the action, feel the attraction. Color my hair, do what I dare, oh- oh-oh. I wanna be free yeah, to feel the way I feel. Man, I feel like a woman!"  
  
"What the hell?" asked Raven as she glanced back, wide-eyed at Lily, both of them having just come through the door.  
  
James and Remus were too hysterical to answer. Raven dropped the grocery bags she was carrying and felt Sirius' forehead. "He's totally smashed. What's going on? We were only gone an hour!"  
  
"We just had a few butterbeer's that were in the fridge, I swear! They're like not even one percent alcohol!" reasoned James.  
  
"Uh. there aren't any butterbeer's in the fridge." She picked up a bottle of Budweiser and rounded on James and Remus. "What the fuck? This is real beer, didn't you notice the difference?"  
  
"Well, we thought it tasted kinda funky, but we just figured it was because it had been in there all summer," said Remus.  
  
Sirius burst into song again. "Take me down to the Paradise City where the grass is green and the girls are pretty. Oh, won't you please take me home, yeah, yeah. Take me down to the-"  
  
Raven put her hand over his mouth. "Jesus, how many has he had?"  
  
"Er. I dunno." James pointed to the table where there were six empty bottles in front of Sirius. "I don't think he's ever had muggle alcohol before."  
  
"No shit," said Raven, removing her hand from Sirius' mouth.  
  
"Raven, I just gotta tell you somethin," he slurred. "The first time I saw you. my heart dropped into my boots."  
  
Raven cracked a smile. "Sirius. I can tell that you think I'm impressed. But do you think you're gonna get me undressed? Cuz if ya do, I got bad news: I wasn't winkin, that was just the booze."  
  
James laughed. "Isn't that in one of your songs, Ray?"  
  
"Okay, we gotta get him in bed," said Remus pulling on his arm.  
  
He jerked his hand away. "No! I don't wanna sleep! I wanna sing!" he said as he clung to his chair like a little kid.  
  
Remus looked at Raven. "He'll go if you tell him to."  
  
Raven sighed. "Alright, Padfoot, I guess I'll hafta go by myself."  
  
Sirius jumped up and rushed over to Raven. "You're coming with me?"  
  
"Of course," she said.  
  
Sirius smiled and backed her into her room. "Aren't you gonna take off your clothes?"  
  
"After you," she said as she pushed him onto her bed and turned to leave the room.  
  
"Wait," Sirius grabbed her hand and pulled her onto the bed with him. "I love you," he said as he started kissing her neck.  
  
Raven looked up and saw James standing above them, laughing.  
  
"God, if it isn't the booze talking, it's his dick," she said, turning back to Sirius. "Baby, you're drunk. You need to sleep it off, okay?"  
  
"Okay," he said, simply. With one quick movement he whipped his shirt over his head and threw it aside. He grabbed Raven around the waist and pulled her closer to him into a bear hug, nestling his head into her body and closing his eyes.  
  
"Um." said Raven, looking up at James again.  
  
"Lily can sleep in my bed. I'll sleep on the other sofa," said James.  
  
"Okay. I'll go in his bed after he falls asleep," she added.  
  
"Okay. Sorry about all this."  
  
"It's okay. I mean, you were a bit thick, but it's not completely your fault," she teased.  
  
"Oh, thanks. Love you. Night," James kissed her cheek and left the room.  
  
"Love you, too." She closed her eyes allowing sleep to creep up on her.  
  
Sirius opened his eyes and immediately closed them, squinting from the light coming through the blinds. It was morning. He looked over and saw Raven laying next to him. "Oh shit!"  
  
Raven jumped up in bed. "What?"  
  
"Oh my God, Raven, did we." he trailed off, massaging his temples. He had a splitting headache and a million thoughts were racing through his head. This is not how he wanted this to happen.  
  
"Yeah," Raven answered. "I'm pretty sure." She decided to play along.  
  
"God dammit! I didn't wanna do this with you! I swear, I didn't mean for this to happen. I wanted it to be different with you, ya know? I didn't want you to be like every other girl was to me!"  
  
He was rambling on as Raven thought to herself. 'Does he really mean this? Maybe I really did change him.'  
  
"I wanted to wait until we were both ready. God, I don't even remember it! Do you? Was it as good as-"  
  
Raven put her finger to his lips. "Um, I'm sure it would have been if we had actually done anything."  
  
"What?" he demanded.  
  
"We didn't do anything; I was fucking with you."  
  
Sirius breathed an enormous sigh of relief and let out a laugh. "Then what happened?"  
  
"You were drunk and I put you to bed, that's all."  
  
"That explains the splitting headache. What was in those butterbeer's?"  
  
"Er. beer?"  
  
"Real muggle beer?"  
  
"Yep. I'll go get you some more," she said, getting up from the bed.  
  
"What? Why?"  
  
"You drink a little down now, and you'll feel a lot better."  
  
"Really?"  
  
Raven crossed the living room, where James was sprawled on the couch, to the porch, where Remus was also still asleep on the futon, and got out a beer from the fridge.  
  
"Startin early?" Remus lifted his head off his pillow and winked at her.  
  
Raven laughed. "It's for Sirius."  
  
"Mm-hmm. You guys do anything last night?"  
  
"Even if we did, he'd have been too drunk to remember," she said as she closed the door to the porch again and went back into her room to find Sirius putting his shirt back on.  
  
"You can leave that off."  
  
"What?" he asked, with the shirt partially over his head.  
  
Raven got onto the bed and hissed in his ear, "Everyone's asleep."  
  
"Mmm, really?" he threw the shirt into a corner again as Raven kissed him intensely. He got into it just as she touched the ice-cold beer bottle to his bare skin. His reflexes quick, he arched his back and let out a yelp. "Holy shit!"  
  
"You deserved that. For last night."  
  
"Wha'd I do?" he worried.  
  
"Practically groped me in front of James."  
  
"Oh shit! Does he know?"  
  
"No, I blamed it on your drunkenness."  
  
"Oh good." Sirius thought for a minute. "Where's Lily?"  
  
"In James' bed."  
  
"What?" he exclaimed.  
  
"Shh! James is on the couch."  
  
"Oh. He's not a virgin, is he?"  
  
"Doesn't he tell you anything? He's your best friend!"  
  
"No, he told me he's done it before, but guys always say that. I figured he would have told you the truth. Peter says he's done it, too."  
  
Raven laughed. "Peter? Yeah right! He's more of a virgin than Lily, probably." She suddenly remembered the beer. "Oh, you hafta drink this."  
  
"No thanks," he said, pushing it away.  
  
"At least half. Trust me, it's the only cure for what you've got."  
  
"I think you're the cure for what I've got," he said as he tackled her and pinned her arms behind her back.  
  
"Yeah? Drink the beer and I'll kiss you."  
  
"You'll kiss me anyway," he threatened.  
  
"Try me," she said, wrenching her hands free of his and pushing him off of her. She twisted the cap off the beer and took a swig herself.  
  
Sirius was staring her down, and she returned his gaze. "Alright, gimme it."  
  
She handed it over and he downed the rest of it. "Good boy."  
  
"So what about Remus?" Sirius asked her.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Ya think he's ever done it?"  
  
"Oh. you don't know this stuff?"  
  
"We don't talk about it as much as you think."  
  
Raven snorted. "Sure, whatever. No, I don't think he's ever done it. He can't keep a girl long enough, right?"  
  
"He's had quite a few girlfriends, but they've only lasted maybe a few weeks, tops. She'll start asking him questions about were he was on the last full moon, and he'll push her away after that. He still doesn't think he can trust anyone. Even after we found out and didn't even bat an eyelash," explained Sirius.  
  
"Yeah, I figured."  
  
"We need to get him a girl."  
  
"Definitely," agreed Raven.  
  
"I don't need a girl. I have you."  
  
Raven jumped and saw Remus standing in her doorway. "You scared me. You need a girl of your own, not me."  
  
"I was talking to Sirius," said Remus, sitting on the bed.  
  
"Aw, Moon," said Sirius, putting his hand to his heart, batting his eyelashes, and talking in his gay voice. "You're such a cutie!" he reached up and pinched both of Remus' cheeks.  
  
Remus swatted his hands away and rubbed his cheeks. "I can't trust anyone but you guys. I'm a monster. They wouldn't understand."  
  
"Remus Milo Lupin, don't you ever say that again!" shouted Raven, her eyes narrowed.  
  
"Rave-"  
  
"No! You are NOT a monster. You're a great guy. Once you let a girl get to know you, she'll be so in love with you, she won't care about that minor detail in your life. It's not your fault you were bitten, and you hafta stop making it your whole life."  
  
"Okay, okay! Chill, drama queen!" teased Remus.  
  
"Least I'm not a drag queen," she said, nudging Sirius.  
  
They all started laughing. "If I was a drag queen, would I do this?" he said, turning Raven's face toward him and kissing her.  
  
"If you were a lesbian drag queen," said Remus as they continued kissing.  
  
"Who's a drag queen?" said James from the hallway.  
  
Raven and Sirius broke apart, quickly, as James opened the door. "Sirius," said Raven and Remus in unison.  
  
"Knew it."  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW. BY THE WAY, I'M STARTING SCHOOL BACK UP TOMORROW (1/12), SO IT MAY TAKE ME A LITTLE LONGER TO UPDATE FROM NOW ON SINCE I HAVE TO BALANCE COLLEGE SHIT, WORK SHIT, AND ALL MY OTHER SHIT TOGETHER. SO SORRY IN ADVANCE IF I'M NOT UPDATING AS MUCH. I WAS TRYING TO BRIBE YOU GUYS BY HAVING THESE LAST FEW CHAPTERS PRETTY MUCH BACK TO BACK. "DON'T BE A FOOL, STAY IN SCHOOL!" LUV YA! ~RAVEN 


	21. Chapter 21

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
A/N: OKAY, FROM NOW ON I'M GOING TO BE PUTTING A RANDOM THOUGHT (OR A FEW RANDOM THOUGHTS IF I CAN'T PICK JUST ONE) ON EACH OF MY CHAPTERS. I THINK I'LL PROBABLY JUST START AS OF RIGHT NOW, BUT IF I DECIDE TO GO BACK AND REDO ALL THE OTHER CHAPTERS, I'LL LET YOU KNOW IN CASE YOU WANT TO READ THEM. THEY'RE USUALLY PRETTY FUNNY. I'LL START OUT WITH A FEW THIS CHAPTER JUST TO KICK IT OFF.  
  
Random Thought #1: "Guys are like roses; you gotta watch out for the pricks!"  
  
Random Thought #2: "Home is behind, the world ahead. And there are many paths to tread. Through shadows, to the edge of night. Until the stars are all alight. Mist and shadow, cloud and shade. All shall fade, all shall fade." ~JRR Tolkien (Billy Boyd sings this in Return of the King and it is so incredibly beautiful. It just sucks that that cow Denethor had to eat like a freakin pig while he was trying to sing!)  
  
Random Thought #3: "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live." ~Albus Dumbledore (Sorcerer's Stone)  
  
Chapter 21 - October 24th  
  
"Morning Minx," said Sirius as he sat down next to Raven in the library and yawned. Raven kept her nose in the book she was reading. "Minx? Minxie!!!! Raven McKinnon, hello???"  
  
Raven jumped and jerked her head up to Sirius. "What?"  
  
"I was calling your name," Sirius said as he rose his eyebrows at her.  
  
"You were?"  
  
"Hey there, Minx," said James as he sat down on the other side of Raven and smiled at her.  
  
Raven turned back to Sirius. "Is that what you were calling me?"  
  
"Yeah, we decided last night in our dorm. Vulpix is too childish, ya know?" Sirius told her.  
  
"Okay, but you gotta let me know, cuz I'm not used to that yet," she replied.  
  
"Wood told me to come get you guys," said James. "We're having practice today.  
  
"Aw shit! We just won! Why?" asked Sirius.  
  
"He kept talking about some Wronski Feint thing he wants Raven to do, or something."  
  
Raven crinkled up her nose. "Wrong ski what?"  
  
"I don't know, it's like a new diving move he said." James shrugged his shoulders. "Couldn't hurt, right?"  
  
James led Sirius and Raven out of the locker rooms and they were met in the doorway by Bellatrix, Rodolphus, and Regulus. Sirius pretended not to see them and "accidentally bumped into Rudolphus.   
  
"Oh my gosh!" said Sirius as he turned around to face them and put his hands on his cheeks. "Wow, I so didn't see you there, Rudy! How inconsiderate of me!" He glared into his brother's eyes and then turned back to Rodolphus.  
  
Rodolphus looked about ready to strangle Sirius. He started shaking with rage as he spoke. "Call me Rudy again and I'll cut your heart out with a spoon, I swear to God!"   
  
Bella put a hand on his shoulder and remained cool. "We'll just see who's still alive after our next Quiddich match, right McKinnon?" She stared arrogantly into Raven's eyes.  
  
Raven had a feeling Bella knew something she didn't, but she replied nonchalantly, "Black, my friend, I appreciate the wit, but from trash like you I take no shit!"  
  
Sirius and James both started cracking up. Sirius doubled over and had to hold his stomach, he was laughing so hard. Bella, Rodolphus, and Regulus slowly slithered away, the laughter following them down the hallway.  
  
"God, Raven that was the best, just the best!" said James, still unable to control his laughter.  
  
"Good goin, Minx! You're gonna earn your nickname yet!" agreed Sirius.  
  
The three of them went down to practice with renewed high spirits.  
  
"Okay, now why don't you guys get a game of three on three goin," said Wood to the rest of the team. "I'll join you in a minute. I want to work with Raven on this new move for a minute because Slytherin has a new seeker and I don't know how good she is."  
  
"She?" asked Raven. Then it hit her. She looked over at Sirius with a pained expression on her face. "Is she good?"  
  
Comprehension suddenly came to Sirius. "Bellatrix? Goddamn it! Slytherin never takes girls on the team!"  
  
"Well, they do now," said Wood. "Does that mean she's good?"  
  
"Well, I don't make a point of hanging out with my pure blood maniac cousin, but as far as I remember, she kicked my ass as seeker when we were kids."  
  
Wood looked like he was expecting this. "Alright, Raven, then we gotta get to work. Don't get me wrong, you're good, but Slytherin plays dirty." The rest of the team mounted their brooms and started playing while Wood showed Raven how to do the dive. "Okay, now it's called a Wronski Defensive Feint; it's a seeker diversion. What you do, is you pretend you see the snitch to get the other seeker to follow you into a dive. You go along straight for awhile and then you go into a sudden steep dive, making the other seeker think you're just chasing after the snitch. You plummet straight down as fast as you can and you pull out at the last second. Hopefully, the other seeker is one step behind you and when you pull up, they'll be hitting the ground and you'll have lots more time to locate the snitch while they're being scraped off the field."  
  
Raven's eyes widened at she looked at Justin concernedly. "Isn't that dangerous? I don't wanna kill anybody!"  
  
Justin waved his hand in the air, dismissively. "I was exaggerating. The other seeker isn't gonna be mortally wounded, but they'll be off their broom, that's for sure, and while they're being tended you, you'd better be looking for the snitch in a real game."  
  
"Okay," said Raven, uneasily.  
  
"Now I'm not even gonna get the snitch out today. I just want you to practice diving straight down and pulling up. Start slow and make sure you can do it, and then gradually get faster. We're gonna practice a lot before we play Slytherin again so you don't hafta master it today. Just keep it slow and steady for now and gradually kick it up a notch once you think you've got it down." Raven nodded and Justin patted her back, warmly. "Thatta girl." He went to join the three on three game and left Raven to practice her diving.  
  
She started off slow, like he said, but it was really easy. She started picking up speed and plummeting straight down at the field, chasing an imaginary snitch. "This is so easy," she thought to herself as she leaned forward on her broom making it go faster and faster. She was about twenty feet from the pitch when she started pulling back up and the quaffle zoomed only an inch away from the right side of her head. She lost her concentration and hit the ground hard, rolling off of her broom and onto the hard grass. The entire team heard the thud and raced over to her. She rolled over her own body on the grass four times before coming to a stop. She was on her side laying on one arm, the other flung out behind her at a weird angle. Her head rested on the ground and her eyes were closed.  
  
"Oh shit," said Wood as he landed next to her and lifted her arm. He let go of it and it dropped back to the ground without delay. Sirius and James landed next and both rushed over to her.   
  
Sirius knelt by her head and lifted it up into his lap. "Raven?" He shook her lightly but she didn't move.  
  
James looked at his unconscious best friend and rounded on Wood. "What the fuck did you tell her to do?"  
  
The rest of the team ran inside to get Madam Pomfrey.  
  
Wood looked extremely worried. "I told her to start out slow, I swear to God! She got distracted by the Quaffle!"  
  
"Yeah, the Quaffle that you threw!" yelled Sirius as he put his hand on Raven's cheek, tapping it lightly.  
  
"I'm a goalie! My aim sucks!" justified Wood.  
  
James knelt down and took Raven's hand. His eyes widened and he let go of it. "I think her arms broken."  
  
"Arms we can fix. Waking her up is going to be a problem," said a stern voice from behind them. Madam Hooch raised her wand to levitate Raven up to the hospital wing.  
  
Raven's body rose and was suspended a few feet from the ground. They all followed Hooch up to the castle.   
  
"What on earth were you doing?" she asked them all, her mouth very thin.  
  
"I had her practicing the Wronski Feint," said Wood uneasily.  
  
Madam Hooch rounded on him. "That is a dangerous trick that only the most skilled flyers can accomplish!"  
  
"She's one of the best flyers I've ever seen, Madam Hooch! I'm sorry! I told her to take it easy!" replied Wood, furious with himself.  
  
They were met in the entrance hall by Madam Pomfrey who took over for Madam Hooch and shoed the team away. "She needs to be treated right now. You can see her later!"  
  
James and Sirius protested loudly. "We need to know if she's going to be alright!" Sirius yelled into her face, angrily.  
  
Pomfrey turned on him and raised her wand. "Black! If I knew, I would tell you! Go to your dormitories, all of you, immediately!"  
  
After Pomfrey had disappeared into the hospital wing, Sirius grabbed James' arm. "The cloak."  
  
James nodded and they both ran up to Gryffindor Tower. Remus, Lily, and Peter met them at the portrait and demanded to know what was going on.  
  
"Wood's saying something about Raven being--"   
  
"Unconscious," Sirius finished Remus' sentence.  
  
"Oh my God!" yelled Lily. She made a move to get past them through the portrait but James caught her around the waist.  
  
"Pomfrey won't let us see her. We're going to get my cloak," said James, still holding onto her.  
  
"Ahem, ahem." Dumbledore cleared his voice behind them and they all whipped around to face him. "Please, you must stay here. I'm going down to the hospital wing to find out the situation. I will come back as soon as I know anything and tell you all. You must understand that the more you try to interfere, the less chance she will have of recovering sooner. If you terrorize Madam Pomfrey it will just take away time she should be using to treat Raven." Dumbledore turned quickly and was gone.  
  
A/N: I DECIDED ON MINX. SORRY TO THOSE OF YOU WHO WANTED VULPIX. I THOUGHT NAMING RAVEN AFTER A POKEMON WOULD BE KIND OF CHILDISH? MINX SAYS MORE ABOUT HER CHARACTER AND VULPIX IS A HARDLY A NICKNAME, DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? NICKNAMES ARE USUALLY SHORT AND EASY TO SAY. VULPIX JUST DOESN'T ROLL OFF THE TONGUE LIKE MINX DOES. "HEY THERE, MINX" AS OPPOSED TO "HEY THERE, VULPIX." FOR SOME REASON IT JUST DOESN'T SOUND RIGHT TO ME. ANYWAYS, I THINK I JUST ACHIEVED MY FIRST REAL CLIFFHANGER, EH?? HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	22. Chapter 22

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
A/N: HI, JUST WANTED TO LET YOU ALL KNOW, CUZ I GOT AN EMAIL TELLING ME THAT REMUS' MIDDLE NAME STARTS WITH A "J." I AM AWARE, THANK YOU. THERE'S A STORY BEHIND "REMUS MILO LUPIN." HE'S MY CAT. I HAVE A YELLOW CAT NAMED MOONY AND A BLACK DOG NAMED PADFOOT, GO FIGURE! ANYWAYS, THEY BOTH GET ALONG REALLY WELL, AND SO WE CALL THEM "MILO & OTIS." (I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'VE SEEN THAT MOVIE, BUT MILO IS A CAT AND OTIS IS A DOG AND THEY'RE BEST FRIENDS.) AND SINCE I DIDN'T KNOW FOR SURE WHAT REMUS' MIDDLE NAME WAS, I DECIDED TO MAKE IT MILO, OKAY? MY FANFIC, MY RULES! TEEHEE. I ALSO MADE SIRIUS' MIDDLE NAME "LEE" CUZ I THOUGHT IT WAS IRONIC. SIRIUS LEE BLACK, AKA SERIOUSLY BLACK. IRONICALLY, SIRIUS IS ANYTHING BUT SERIOUSLY BLACK. ANYWAYS, JUST WANTED TO EXPLAIN IN CASE THAT BUGGED ANYONE ELSE. IF REMUS' MIDDLE NAME HAS TO START WITH A "J" I WOULD EITHER PICK "JEFFERY" CUZ IT'S CUTE, OR "JACOPO" CUZ OF IN THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO. IF YOU'VE SEEN THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO OR READ THE BOOK, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, RIGHT? THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO IS A LOT LIKE SIRIUS' SITUATION. EDMUND DANTES WAS BETRAYED BY HIS BEST FRIEND AND SENT TO THE CHATEAU D'IF FOR 13 YEARS. SIRIUS WAS BETRAYED BY HIS BEST FRIEND AND SENT TO AZKABAN FOR 12 YEARS. YOU SHOULD READ THE BOOK OR WATCH THE MOVIE IF YOU CAN, CUZ IT'S ALMOST SPOOKY HOW SIMILAR IT IS TO THIS. AND RAVEN CAN BE MERCEDES, TEEHEE! ANYWAYS, JACOPO BECOMES EDMUND'S FRIEND AND HELPS HIM GET HIS REVENGE AND REMUS IS SIRIUS' FRIEND AND TRIES TO HELP HIM KILL WORMTAIL. GET IT? MAYBE NOT. EMAIL OR IM ME IF YOU'RE CONFUSED AND I'LL EXPLAIN EVERYTHING, AND YOU SHOULD REALLY AT LEAST SEE THE MOVE, THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO. IT'S MY THIRD FAVORITE MOVIE EVER AND IT REMINDS ME OF SIRIUS.  
  
Random Thought #1: "Real life sucks losers dry. If you wanna fuck with the eagles, you hafta learn to fly." ~The movie, Heathers  
  
Random Thought #2: "Friends are like a wedgie: They know your inner self, they're initially close, and it feels great to pick one out!"  
  
Chapter 22 - October 24th/25th  
  
Sirius and James looked at each other and sighed. They knew Dumbledore was right, though it killed them to admit it. They all decided to stay up and wait for Dumbledore to come back. The five of them sat on the couches and stared at the portrait hole until one by one they all fell asleep. Sirius kept shaking his head when he would drift off to wake himself up again, but then he drifted off...  
  
Dumbledore came quietly into the common room and surveyed the scene before him. He would have laughed at them all sleeping on top of one another if he had had good news to tell them. He decided he would wake up Sirius first and let him see her alone.   
  
"Mr. Black, would you come with me, please?" Dumbledore did not move his lips and uttered no sound, but Sirius jerked his head up from his shoulder and stared at the Headmaster. He quickly got up and followed Dumbledore out into the hallway. "I wanted to let you be alone with her first. I'm afraid it doesn't look good, Sirius. Madam Pomfrey was not able to revive her, so we called the head nurse from St. Mungo's."  
  
"Did she have any luck?" asked Sirius, fearing that he already knew the answer.  
  
Dumbledore shook his head mutely. "We aren't sure how long she can hold on. If she isn't revived within about twelve hours or so, she will most likely be lost to the coma."  
  
For the second time in his life, Sirius' heart dropped into his boots. For the first time in his life, this wasn't a pleasant feeling. He quickened his pace as he saw the hospital wing door in the distance. He had to get to her. He would revive her himself. She would wake up for him. Those nurses didn't know shit.  
  
Dumbledore put a hand on his shoulder and slowed him down again. "I understand that the two of you have finally admitted your feelings for one another, especially in the supply closet." Dumbledore gave Sirius and knowing look and he quickly turned the shade of Lily's hair. "That is why I wanted to give you the chance to see her first." They came to the door and Dumbledore let go of Sirius' shoulder and opened the door for him.  
  
Sirius hesitated and took a deep breath. He strode through the door and saw Madam Pomfrey and the nurse from St. Mungo's both bending over Raven on opposite sides of her bed. Dumbledore cleared his throat and the two of them nodded, gliding past Sirius. Madam Pomfrey put her hand on his shoulder as Dumbledore had before she followed the other nurse into her office. Sirius looked at Dumbledore.  
  
"I'll speak with the nurses." He left Sirius alone in the room with Raven.  
  
Sirius quickly ran to the bed and knelt down beside her. She was laid on her back, with her arms down straight at her side, like they had been placed there unnaturally. Her head was to the side, facing him. All Sirius would have to do is call her name and she would wake up.   
  
"Raven," he said quietly. Her eyes didn't open. "Raven," he said a little louder, lacing his fingers into hers. "Please wake up." With his other hand, he pushed a strand of hair off of her face and ran his fingers through her hair down to the nape of her neck. He lifted her head gently. "Raven!" he pleaded forcefully. He let her head rest back on the pillow as he felt the tears stinging his eyes. He quickly pressed his lips to hers thinking maybe a kiss would wake her up. He sighed as she continued to sleep. "I'm not letting you go now. You're the only girl that's ever meant something to me, don't you get it? I know you can hear me. Please--"  
  
She suddenly let out a loud snore. Sirius froze. "Is she snoring?" he asked himself. "People in comas don't snore!" He shook her excitedly. "Raven!" She snored again, this one was even louder. "Open your eyes, Raven!"...  
  
Sirius woke up with a start. Rested on his shoulder was Peter's head, and he was snoring loudly and obnoxiously. Sirius suddenly remembered his dream and threw Peter's head off his shoulder. "Oh my God, she's only got a few hours!" he thought as he scrambled up and out the portrait hole. Peter fell down on his side where Sirius had been sleeping and continued to snore.  
  
Sirius was having doubts as to whether that was all really a dream. He sprinted to the hospital wing and threw open the doors. He had to bend down and put his hands on his knees because he was tired from running. When he looked up, he saw four empty beds. He shuffled forward nervously and banged his toe on one of the beds. "Ow, motherfuck!" he screamed as he hopped on one foot and rubbed his other.   
  
"Oh God, why isn't she here?" he thought. "Maybe she's all better," his heart lifted. "Maybe they moved her to St. Mungo's." His head dropped a few notches. "What the fuck happened to Dumbledore?" he thought angrily. "Maybe she's looking for us." He decided to go look for her around the school.  
  
Raven entered the common room and surveyed the scene before her. She laughed at them all sleeping on top of one another. She cleared her throat and the four of them jerked their heads up in unison and stared at her. "Where's Sirius?" she thought to herself.   
  
"Raven!" yelled the four of them together as they surrounded her and hugged her tightly.   
  
"They made it sound like you'd never wake up!" said James, tightly hugging his best friend around the waist.  
  
"James, I can't breath. You wouldn't want to put me into a coma now, would you?" she teased.  
  
James just shook his head. "I forbid you to ever joke about that. You scared the shit out of me!"  
  
"Us," corrected Remus.  
  
"Yes, all of us," added Lily. Peter nodded.  
  
"All of you? Where's Sirius?"  
  
"Oh..." They all looked around for Sirius, having not noticed that he wasn't right there hugging Raven with them.  
  
"Maybe he went to the hospital wing," supplied Lily.  
  
"I'd better go look for him," said Raven, turning from them and taking a few steps towards the portrait hole.  
  
James pulled her back. "He'll figure it out. C'mon, tell us what you remember. Was your arm broken?"  
  
"Yeah," she answered, her eyes still on the portrait hole. She desperately wanted Sirius' arms around her as soon as possible. She turned back to James. "But that's about it."  
  
James noticed a cut near her eyebrow and touched it with his finger. "That hurt?"  
  
Raven shrugged. "A little." The rest of them sat on the couch and James patted the seat next to him. Raven shook her head and whispered. "My butt hurts."  
  
James laughed as Lily grabbed his sleeve. "The Beach Boys! I love this song!"  
  
Raven and James looked over at a group of fourth years who had a radio going. (A/N: YEAH, NO ELECTRONIC DEVICES INSIDE HOGWARTS, I KNOW. BUT IT'S MY FANFIC AND I DO WHAT I WANT! HEHE)  
  
Sirius entered the common room and saw Raven as the lyrics started. She turned and saw him coming towards her. He didn't even hesitate, he just walked straight up to her and did what he'd been wanting to do since she fell. He kissed her deeply as the song played.   
  
(This is the song. He kisses her when the lyrics start.) "Well, it's been buildin up inside of me for oh, I don't know how long. I don't know why, but I keep thinkin something's bound to go wrong. But she looks in my eyes and makes me realize when she says, 'Don't worry, baby. Everything will turn out all right. Don't worry baby.'"  
  
Sirius pulled away only to wrap his arms around her and hug her tightly. "I swear to God, I thought you were a goner!"  
  
Raven looked over at James, Lily, Remus, and Peter and saw the shock on their faces, especially James. Sirius let go of her and then realized what had just happened. He looked over at his best friend and saw his eyes turn to ice.  
  
A/N: OKAY, WHO'S SEEN NEVER BEEN KISSED???? DID YOU RECOGNIZE THAT KISS THING? I WAS WATCHIN IT THIS MORNING AND I DIDN'T HAVE AN IDEA FOR THE CHAPTER YET, AND I THOUGHT THAT WOULD BE CUTE. I JUST LOVE HOW HE GOES RIGHT UP TO HER AND DOES IT, YA KNOW? ANYWAYS, NOW JAMES KNOWS. WHAT'S HE GONNA DO ABOUT IT? IF I GET ENOUGH REVIEWS FOR THIS CHAPTER, I'LL POST THE NEXT ONE THIS WEEKEND ALSO. HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW. 


	23. Chapter 23

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
A/N: QUITE A BIT OF SWEARING IN THIS CHAPTER JUST TO WARN YOU...I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER WARNED YOU BEFORE, BUT I PROBABLY SHOULD. BY THE WAY, I HAVE A NEW FANFIC ABOUT SIRIUS AND RAVEN IF YOU WANT TO READ IT. THE BACKGROUND IS DIFFERENT, BUT IT'S STILL RAVEN/SIRIUS. IT STARTS WHEN SIRIUS GOES INTO HIDING IN A TROPICAL PLACE AT THE END OF PRISONER OF AZKABAN. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE READ IT AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK. I'M JUST SORT OF TRYING IT OUT, BUT I THINK IT'LL BE GOOD. IT'S CALLED "RENEGADES" AND YOU CAN JUST CLICK ON MY AUTHOR NAME AND THEN CLICK THE FANFIC AT THE BOTTOM. ALSO, MY BEST FRIEND JORDAN HAS REALLY AWESOME FANFICS AND SOME OF THEM HAVE RAVE AND SIRIUS IN THEM, SO CHECK HER OUT TOO. HER PEN NAME IS PYROJORDIBLACK. HOPE YOU LIKE THIS CHAPTER! I NEED REVIEWS!  
  
Random Thought #1: "You don't understand - there are things worth dying for!" ~Sirius Black (Order of the Phoenix)  
  
Random Thought #2: "Time - don't let it slip away. Raise your drinkin glass. Here's to yesterday! In time we're all gonna trip away. Don't piss heaven off. We've got hell to pay." ~"Full Circle" by Aerosmith  
  
Random Thought #3: "In life we are all either kings or pawns." ~The Count of Monte Cristo  
  
Chapter 23 - October 25th  
  
James got to his feet and narrowed his eyes on the two of them. "What the fuck is this?"  
  
"Prongs, it just happened a few days ago. We wanted to make sure it was gonna last before we told everyone."  
  
"Oh, how thoughtful of you!" James turned and advanced on Sirius. "You wasted all that fucking time scaming us into thinking you were together and now you're doing exactly the opposite? I thought I was your partner in crime, not your victim!"  
  
Lily stood up next to James. "James, calm down."  
  
James rounded on Lily. "And I suppose you already knew, didn't you?" She shut up after that. James continued to yell at Raven and Sirius, "What are you? Dense? Did you think I was gonna be happy for you this time? Cuz you're wrong, I'm not happy! I wasted all that time trying to get you guys together and you shoved it in my face! Now I finally get used to you guys just being friends and now you're together? Get a god damn clue! People don't want to be played with like that! You can both go to hell and stay there for all I care!"  
  
With that, he pushed the portrait hole open forcefully and left the common room. Raven was fuming. She caught the portrait as he slammed it shut and followed him onto the stairwell.  
  
"James, get the fuck back here! I'm talking to you, god dammit!" she yelled after him.  
  
James spun back around and crossed his arms. "You know all he wants out of you is a piece of ass. I can't believe you would fall for his shit!"  
  
"Oh yeah?" said Raven, narrowing her eyes. "Well for your information, we haven't even had sex yet! Do you know what he told me? He said that he didn't wanna screw it up with me and it would be better if we waited!" She thought she had him on this.  
  
James let out a bitter laugh. "You fell for that, too? So did every other girl he tried it on that he knew he couldn't get the first night!"  
  
Raven gasped. "Oh my God, you'd better be joking, James Potter!"  
  
"Yeah?" He looked into her eyes coldly. "You wish!" With that, he ran down the stairs and out of sight.  
  
Raven stared after him for a minute, unable to move. She wanted to cry but wasn't gonna do it in front of anyone. She gave the password and the Fat Lady portrait opened back up. She walked in silently.  
  
"What happened?" asked Sirius. She didn't answer him. She turned and gave him an icy stare and disappeared into her room. "What was that for?" He crossed the room in three strides and talked through Lucy's portrait. "Raven, what did he say to you? He wants you to get mad at me, don't you know that? I'm not gonna beg for you to let me in, but I want you to tell me what he said. Don't I deserve the chance to explain?" The portrait slid up for him. He hesitated and then stepped in. The portrait closed again behind him.  
  
Raven was face down on her bed. Was she crying? He coudln't tell. He sat on her bed next to her and ran his fingers through her hair.   
  
"I'm sorry," he started. "I wasn't thinking. Well, I was thinking, but the only thing I was thinking is how much I wanted to kiss you when I saw that you were okay." He laughed lightly. "I had a dream that you wouldn't wake up, and when I saw that you were very much awake I just couldn't stop myself."  
  
Raven spoke through her pillow, her voice muffled. "I'm not mad about that. If you hadn't done it, I would have."  
  
"Then what are you mad about? I know James said something to you. Was it about me? You hafta tell me! What, are you gonna be mad at us both for the rest of your life?"  
  
"Maybe," she replied sternly. She sat up and he could see the tracks of the tears that had rolled down her face and onto the pillow. He reached up and with his thumb he wiped them from her right eye.  
  
Raven made up her mind quickly. She suddenly placed her lips on his and kissed him. Sirius wasn't expecting this, but got into it and she pushed her tongue into his mouth. She pushed him down on the bed and climbed on top of him. She kissed him again, even more passionately. Sirius just laid there, dumbfounded.   
  
"Boy, when you need attention," he said into her mouth as she kissed him again and then pulled away only to throw her shirt over her head revealing a bright purple bra. Sirius' eyes widened as she leaned in for another long kiss. He rolled over on top of her and pulled away. "Raven, what are you doing?"  
  
"It's called sex, Sirius. It's fun; we should try it," she answered him simply.  
  
Sirius quickly got off the bed and stood next to it. "This isn't the time for that."  
  
As she sat back up, Raven looked at him like he was crazy. "I think it is," she said adamantly.  
  
Sirius sat on the bed next to her. "I told you. I don't wanna mess this up, Raven. I don't think I've ever really cared about a girl I was with before I met you, and I don't wanna throw that away."  
  
"You're saying you're not gonna care about me anymore after we have sex?"  
  
"No, that's not what I'm saying!" he said quickly. "I'm saying every other girl I've gotten into bed within the first week, and I don't want you to be like that!"  
  
"It's been almost three weeks, Sirius."  
  
"I know, but I'm scared! This is one of the longest relationships I've ever had! There was that one Ravenclaw I learned the Dirty Dancing thing for, but I was like fourteen then!"  
  
Raven looked into Sirius' eyes and could tell he was completely sincere. She suddenly burst into tears and Sirius quickly put his arms around her. She sobbed into his chest. Why would James have told her that? He was upset, but he was still her best friend. How could he have wanted to hurt them both like that? It could have ruined them if she had believed James.  
  
"You ready to tell me what James said?" Sirius asked as he gently rubbed her back.  
  
"He said... he said..." she cried some more and then took a deep breath. "He said that you just wanted to get in my pants, and then I told him what you said after you woke up, ya know, at my cottage? And then he laughed and said that you say that to every girl you think you can't get the first night."  
  
"What?" squeaked Sirius. "He *said* that? Raven, it's not true! I swear it's not true!"  
  
"I know," she said, calmly, "you just proved it to me."  
  
"I..." he trailed off. "You mean that was all just a test?" Raven nodded. A smile slowly crept along Sirius' face. "And what would you have done if I had said, 'You're right, let's do it!' ?"  
  
Raven smiled deviously. "If you hafta ask, you're not as smart as you think you are."  
  
"So you would have kicked me out and never talked to me again?"  
  
"Yup!" They both laughed together. Raven layed back down on her back. Sirius layed down on his side, facing her. She looked sideways at him. "So what are we supposed to do now?" Sirius rose an eyebrow at her suggestively. Raven hit him lightly across the chest. "I meant about James, you dickhead!"  
  
"Dickhead, huh?" Sirius tried to keep a straight face. "What, may I ask, is a dickhead exactly?"  
  
Raven tried not to laugh. "...You..."  
  
"If I'm a dickhead and you're going out with me, then what does that make you?" he asked her, running a finger down her cheek.  
  
Raven sighed. "An idiot."  
  
"You think we'd be the perfect pair...a dickhead and an idiot."  
  
"You'd think so."  
  
"Our first fight," he said, leaning in to kiss her briefly.  
  
Raven grinned as he pulled away. "I'm not gonna sleep with you yet."  
  
"I *know* that!"  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! NEXT CHAPTER I'LL TRY TO HAVE THEM MAKE UP WITH JAMES. I JUST THOUGHT THAT WAS A GOOD PLACE TO END. ONCE AGAIN, CHECK OUT "RENEGADES" MY NEW FANFIC. 


	24. Chapter 24

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
A/N: OKAY, I'VE GOTTEN A LOT OF CONFUSION WITH THAT LAST CHAPTER. JAMES IS STILL THEIR BEST FRIEND, PEOPLE, HE'S JUST A LITTLE PISSED OFF! WOULDN'T YOU BE IF YOU SPENT ALL THAT TIME TRYING TO GET YOUR OTHER TWO BEST FRIENDS TOGETHER AND THEY SCAMMED YOU, AND THEN AFTER YOU FINALLY GET USED TO THE FACT THAT THEY'RE JUST GONNA BE FRIENDS, THEY BECOME MORE THAN FRIENDS AND HIDE IT FROM YOU??? THAT'S ALL THAT WAS HAPPENING. WHEN PEOPLE GET MAD, THEY SAY THINGS THEY DON'T MEAN. THEY ARE ALL STILL BEST FRIENDS, OKAY? THEY JUST HAD A ROW. IT WILL BE RESOLVED IN THIS CHAPTER, DON'T WORRY. YOU GUYS CRACK ME UP! EVERYBODY'S EMAILING ME SAYING "OMG, ARE THEY NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE?????" AND ANOTHER THING...THEY'RE ALL BEST FRIENDS, OKAY? DON'T YOU GUYS HAVE MORE THAN ONE BEST FRIEND? THEY'RE ALL EQUALLY BEST FRIENDS, FOR NOW. ENJOY THE CHAPTER AND KEEP THE REVIEWS COMING, THANX!  
  
Random Thought #1: "A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting right next to you saying, 'That was fucking great!'"  
  
Random Thought #2: "Suck it up, Buttercup!"  
  
Chapter 24 - October 25th  
  
Raven suddenly sat up and looked at the clock. "You missed breakfast. You'd better get to class."  
  
"Don't you mean, *we* better get to class?" Sirius asked her.  
  
"Dumbledore gave me the day off."  
  
"Oh, not fair! You fall twenty feet and go into a coma and you get the day off?" he teased her.  
  
"Hey, I don't argue with the man," Raven justified.  
  
"Damn the man!" joked Sirius, getting up and ruffling his hair. "So what are we gonna do about James?"  
  
Raven shrugged. "Maybe we could just...give him the impression that I'm really pissed at you because of what he said."  
  
Sirius gave her a killer smile. "But what if he really doesn't care and that's what he was trying to do?"  
  
"Padfoot, you know James just as well as I do if not better. He just says things when he's mad. He doesn't really mean it. If he sees that we're both miserable, then he'll tell the truth."  
  
"Okay."  
  
"But I need to know something first," Raven suddenly grabbed Sirius' robes and pulled him down so his face was only a few inches from hers. "are you sure you're telling me the truth?"  
  
Sirius was surprised and disoriented. "N-no...no, I--" he sputtered.  
  
"No, you aren't telling me the truth?" she said, keeping her eyes locked on his.  
  
"No--y-yes! Yes, I'm telling the truth," he wasn't sure what she meant.  
  
"So you never used that line to get a girl in bed? Ever?"  
  
"N-no!" He stuttered as she backed him into the foot of her bed.  
  
"Cuz if James is really telling the truth, then there's no sense in making him feel bad about it!"  
  
Sirius snapped out of it and replied adamantly, "Raven, I never said it!"  
  
She let go of him and sat back down on her bed. "Okay, that's all I wanted to know."  
  
"Alright, I gotta go." Sirius stumbled on the edge of the bed as he tried to walk. "Wow, you're hot when you're scary!"  
  
Raven giggled. "Hey, come back up here for lunch if you can get away. I'll go sneak some food from the kitchens."  
  
"Wild nundu couldn't stop me," he teased as he kissed her quickly goodbye.  
  
"Is there such thing as a domesticated nundu?" she questioned as the portrait closed.  
  
(A/N: QUESTIONS ON NUNDU, SEE FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM, OR ASK ME IN YOUR REVIEW AND I'LL EMAIL YOU TO EXPLAIN. THEY'RE REALLY COOL!)  
  
All of the Gryffindors down at breakfast, Sirius was glad to find the common room empty. He ran up to his dorm quickly to get his books and went to class. He was the last one to arrive and snuck in quickly while Professor Sprout's back was turned. Lily, Remus, Peter, and James all looked at him as he stood next to them.  
  
"Where's Raven?" mouthed Lily.  
  
Sirius shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. James noticed and instantly turned red. They split up into partners to work on their assignment and Sirius worked with Peter.  
  
"So, you and Raven, huh?" Peter asked Sirius uncertainly.  
  
"Uh...yeah Pete. You got a problem with that?" he answered gruffly.  
  
"No!" said Peter quickly. "No, but I think maybe James does."  
  
"Ya think?" asked Sirius, sarcastically, glancing over at James, who was working with Lily.  
  
James was muttering under his breath to Lily. "So you think she dumped him?"  
  
"What on earth did you say to her, Jay?" Lily replied, suspiciously.  
  
James looked downtrodden. "I may have told her that Sirius just wanted to do her and then lose her."  
  
"What?" Lily practically screeched. "How could you? What would you do if Sirius had told me that about you?"  
  
"I'd kick his ass," replied James gloomily.  
  
"Sirius is being the bigger man by not beating you up right now. Raven must have given it to him pretty bad."  
  
"You know her. I'm sure she did."  
  
"And what are you gonna do about it?" asked Lily, giving James a defying look.  
  
He nodded. "I'll go talk to her during lunch."  
  
While no one was looking, Sirius quietly made his way out of the classroom and up to Gryffindor Tower. He was careful to see that no one was in the common room when he tapped the wall three times with his wand. Lucy's portrait appeared.  
  
"Hey Luce. How's my favorite portrait?" asked Sirius, winking sexily at Lucy.  
  
Lucy blushed noticably. "Hanging in there. And how is the hottest seventh year to ever walk the Hogwarts castle?"  
  
"Lucy, stop hitting on my boyfriend!" came Raven's voice from inside the room.  
  
Sirius rose his eyebrows twice at Lucy as her portrait lifted to let him into the room.  
  
"You're early," said Raven, coming up to Sirius and throwing her arms around his neck.  
  
"I skipped," he answered nonchalantly.  
  
"What? Alright Black! Detention, my bedroom, ten o'clock sharp!" she joked.  
  
"It's a date!" Sirius dipped her into a kiss. He pulled away as he got a whif of the food. "Mmm, I see you found your way to the kitchen!"  
  
"Yes I did."  
  
"And of course," he picked up a bowl, "Ramen noodles!"  
  
"My favorite."  
  
"Did you want to eat now or..." he trailed off, giving her his sexiest smile.  
  
Raven looked at the ceiling and pretended she was thinking really hard. She put a finger to her lip and tapped it. "...Or!" she said as she pulled his robes and brought his mouth down to hers.  
  
Sirius put a hand on the back of her neck, deepening the kiss, and the other on her cheek, and then down through her hair. Raven had one hand on Sirius' shoulder and the other around his back.  
  
Lucy cleared her throat behind them. They broke apart reluctantly and each gave her a dirty look. "Um...James is outside," she told them. "I thought I'd better ask before I let him in."  
  
"Oh shit! Sirius, get in the bathroom!" Raven pushed Sirius into the bathroom and slammed the door. Then she ran over to her bed and sat down.   
  
The portrait slid open and James walked in. He gave Raven a sympathetic look and hesitantly sat down next to her. "Raven, I need to talk to you."  
  
"Obviously," she said. "Hungry?"  
  
"Uh..." he saw the food, "no, not really, thanks. It's about Sirius. Well, what I said...it..."  
  
"Wasn't true," Raven finished for him.  
  
James froze. "How did you know?"  
  
"I could tell by the way Sirius acted when I confronted him. James, why did you say it?"  
  
"I don't know. I was all mad. I wasn't thinking who it would hurt," he said, looking at her sadly.  
  
"Why did you get so mad?"  
  
"Because, I don't know. Maybe it was just fear of losing my best friends."  
  
"You don't think we felt that when you and Lily got together? We did. We just didn't say anything cuz we knew how much you liked her."  
  
"Oh..." said James dejectedly. "I didn't realize."  
  
"I know. We shouldn't have hidden it. We should have just told everyone right away."  
  
"No, I see why you didn't. You'd already faked us out once. You wanted to make sure it was for real this time, right?"  
  
Raven nodded. "But we still shouldn't have lied."  
  
"You didn't lie. You just weren't very forthcoming!" defended James.  
  
"Oh, now you're taking our side?"  
  
"Maybe I should have in the beginning. I'm the one who was always saying how perfect you'd be together." Raven laughed. "So am I forgiven?"  
  
Raven nodded and put her arms around her best friend. James hugged her back and kissed her forehead.  
  
"So you should go find Sirius. He looked pretty melodramatic in class today," remembered James.  
  
"Oh really?" asked Raven. "That's cuz we scammed you again."  
  
"What? God dammit! What now?" asked James.  
  
"Well..." Raven laughed, "I did believe you at first, and I yelled at him, but he said you just wanted me to get mad at him. So we thought if we...gave you the impression that what you said made us break up, you'd admit that you didn't really say it. Plus, I wasn't entirely sure that you were lying in the first place. I mean, I know it's different with me, and he's told me that, but I wouldn't put it past him to tell a girl he didn't want to sleep with her so she'd have sex with him sooner."  
  
James looked very confused. "So...we're good now?"  
  
"Ask Sirius," said Raven, pointing behind him.  
  
James whipped around, saw Sirius, and then turned back to Raven. "Alright," he said, raising his hand and pointing a finger at the two of them, "you two need to stop with the scamming! You're together now, right? It's for real?"  
  
Sirius and Raven looked at each other and then laughed. "Yeah, Jay," answered Sirius, clapping him on the back, "if it's alright with you."  
  
"What do you mean? It was my idea!" teased James.  
  
A/N: EVERYONE TOGETHER NOW, "AWWWW...." *ROLLS EYES* SAPPY SCENE, HAD TO DO IT. I'M GLAD IT'S OVER WITH. HMM...ANYONE HAVE ANY IDEAS FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER??? THAT'S ALL THAT'S ON MY AGENDA TILL CHRISTMAS, LOL. HOW ABOUT A NICE SHOWDOWN BETWEEN GRYFFINDOR AND SLYTHERIN. THAT'S ALWAYS NICE! HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT. PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW!!!!! 


	25. Chapter 25

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. You all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
A/N: THE BEST IDEA I GOT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER WAS TO HAVE STUFF WITH THE OTHER CHARACTERS. I COMPLETELY AGREE. I'VE BEEN FOCUSING JUST ON SIRIUS AND RAVEN LATELY CUZ EVERYONE'S BEEN BUGGING ME TO GET THEM TOGETHER, SO HOPEFULLY THIS CHAPTER WON'T TURN OUT TO BE CENTERED ONLY AROUND RAVEN AND SIRIUS. BY THE WAY, SOMEHOW MY DATES GOT SCREWED UP, SO I'M WORKING ON FIXING THEM. PAY NO ATTENTION TO DATES, ANYWAY. THEY'RE JUST SO I KNOW WHERE I'M AT.  
  
*****JUST SO YOU KNOW, FOR SOME REASON, FANFICTION.NET WON'T LET ME LOG IN AT HOME. I'M AT SVSU RIGHT NOW, SO SORRY I HAVEN'T GOTTEN THE CHAPTER OUT SOONER. I CAN ONLY UPDATE WHEN I HAVE TIME INBETWEEN CLASSES RIGHT NOW. ANYONE ELSE HAVING TROUBLE LOGGING IN? IM ABOUT READY TO BEAT THE SHIT OUTTA MY COMPUTER, LOL. IT WON'T EVEN GO TO THE LOG IN SCREEN. OH WELL...I'LL TRY TO KEEP UPDATING REGULARLY FROM SCHOOL.  
  
This chapter's Random Thought: It's actually song lyrics from "Second Guessing" by Jonny Lang cuz I went to see him in concert last night!!!!  
  
"Writing down your deepest emotions, with your pen in hand - Your piece of paper flew out the window, you watched it try to land - You felt so bad as it flew out of sight - A part of your heart alone in the night - But all of a sudden you didn't mind it - When you pictured the lonely stranger that would finally find it - Everything that you're looking for, you'll know when it's real - You'll know when you've found it, by the way it makes you feel."  
  
Chapter 25 - October 21st   
  
Lily, James, Remus, Raven, Sirius, and Peter sat outside on the grass in the courtyard after watching the Ravenclaw team beat Hufflepuff. Lily and James had a blanket draped over their legs while Lily was trying to keep James focused on their Head Girl and Boy duties. He kept whispering something into her ear, and she'd giggle and then hit him playfully.   
  
Raven and Sirius looked at each other and rolled their eyes. Sirius leaned in to whisper something in Raven's ear. "Please shoot me if I ever get like that with you."  
  
"It's completely a waste if you ask me. You know he's not saying anything that dirty, or Lily would slap him up."  
  
Sirius laughed and leaned over to whisper what Raven had said to Remus. Remus let out a laugh and nodded his head.  
  
Eve came by with another Slytherin girl and gave them a disgusted look. "Get a room, why don't you," she said, looking distastefully at James and Lily.  
  
Raven and Sirius both burst out laughing bogusly. Raven laughed as loud as she could and pretended she was crying, while Sirius did the same and put his hand over his heart like he was finding it hard to breathe because what Eve said was so hilarious. Lily, James, Remus, and Peter then started laughing at Raven and Sirius' display of sarcastic laughter.  
  
"Oh Eve," said Sirius, fanning his face and continuing to laugh fakely, "you're a hoot!" Then he abruptly stopped laughing and gave her a menacing look. "Fuck off." He winked at her friend, who was staring at him with her mouth open.  
  
Eve scoffed and retreated with her Slytherin friend, still gawking at Sirius.  
  
Raven stared after them and then turned back to Sirius. "Wow, Padfoot, I think you coulda had her, or have you already?"  
  
"Nah, she flirted with me constantly for the whole week I was going out with Eve. I generally stayed away from Slytherins just cuz they're whores, but I wanted to piss Regulus off."  
  
"He like her or something?" asked James.  
  
"He did when I asked her out, yeah."  
  
"I didn't know that. I thought you had just lowered your standards that year," teased Remus.  
  
"It amazes me that you're all talking about this like it's nothing. You don't ask out a girl just to nail her and then dump her the next day!" said Lily, fiercely.  
  
"Well, Padfoot and I were like that...that is, until you finally said yes to me, and he met Raven."  
  
"James, I don't wanna even think about all the girls you've been with," replied Lily.  
  
"But I'm not like that anymore, I swear! I would never do that to you, Lil." He put his finger on her chin and rose her head up to look at him. "Ever, okay?"  
  
Lily rolled her eyes and smiled. James leaned in and kissed her.  
  
"Oh, there they go again," said Sirius, searching in his bag and pulling out a paper plate with the number two on it. He held it up in the air as Remus and Peter found their paper plates. Lately, Lily and James had been growing more and more affectionate, so Sirius distributed paper plates to his friends for them to rate their public displays of affection. Remus held up a four, Peter a five, and Raven rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, Wormtail, a five? That was weak! There wasn't even any tongue!"  
  
(A/N: ANYONE NOT GET THAT? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A WEDDING AND WHEN YOU TAP YOUR GLASSES THE BRIDE AND GROOM ARE SUPPOSED TO KISS? AT MY COUSIN'S WEDDING A FEW MONTHS AGO, SOMEONE BROUGHT PAPER PLATES WITH THE NUMBERS 1-10 ON THEM AND WE WERE SUPPOSED TO RATE THEIR KISSES, 1 BEING THE DRYEST, AND 10 BEING THE MOST PASSIONATE.)  
  
Peter shrugged and Raven gave him a reassuring look.  
  
"Guys, that's getting really annoying," said Lily.  
  
"My point exactly!" replied Sirius.  
  
"Sirius, why are you complaining? It's not like you don't have someone to snog right next to you," James put in.  
  
Raven scoffed as Sirius turned to grin at her. "You know, James, you're right," he said. He quickly grabbed Remus's face and put his thumbs over Remus's lips, bringing their heads together so it looked like they were kissing.  
  
James, Raven, Lily, and Peter started cracking up as everyone in the courtyard around them froze, staring at Sirius Black dip Remus Lupin into a kiss.  
  
"Get the fuck offa me!" roared Remus, pushing Sirius hard onto Raven. "Everyone's gonna think I'm gay!"  
  
Sirius's back landed across Raven's legs and he looked up at her, smiling. "Pardon me, is this seat taken?"  
  
"I cannot believe you just snogged him right in front of me! I thought I meant something to you!" joked Raven, pretending to cry.  
  
"I got caught up in the moment, I'm sorry!"  
  
"Whoa, who is that?" asked Peter, his eyes wide as he looked past them at the other end of the courtyard.  
  
The other five turned and saw what Peter saw. An overly large, hairy guy talking to Dumbledore.   
  
"Wow. Must be part giant," said Remus.  
  
"Lily, James, go find out what's going on. You're Head Boy and Girl," suggested Raven.  
  
Lily and James looked at each other and then made their way over. "Excuse me, Headmaster?" said Lily.  
  
Dumbledore turned and beamed down at her. "Lily, James, I want you to meet Rubeus Hagrid, I've asked him to be our new Groundskeeper."  
  
Lily and James stared up at the huge man as he stuck out a hand and gave them an amiable smile. Despite his size, each of them smiled back and took turns shaking his hand. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Hagrid," said James.  
  
"Just Hagrid," he said as he continued to smile.   
  
"James and Lily are Head Boy and Girl here, Hagrid. They'll help you in any way they can, I'm sure. I must be getting back to my office. Good day."  
  
"So, how do you like Hogwarts so far Mr...I mean, Hagrid?" asked Lily.  
  
"Oh, I been here before. Went ter school here...sorta," replied Hagrid, uneasily.  
  
(A/N: YEAH, I SUCK AT HAGRID, THAT'S WHY I WASN'T GONNA PUT HIM IN, SO BEAR WITH ME.)  
  
Sirius, Remus, Peter, and Raven had run up to meet them as soon as Dumbledore had gone. "Hi," they all said in unison.  
  
"Well hello there. My name's Hagrid. Gonna be the new Groundskeeper," he introduced himself.  
  
"Wow, too bad he's not a teacher," said Sirius as they went back in the castle. "I bet he'd let us do all kinds of dangerous stuff." The rest of them rolled their eyes at Sirius. "...What?"  
  
"Hey guys, how about we take a little trip into Hogsmeade?" suggested James, winking at Lily.  
  
"James! We're Head Boy and Girl, we can't get caught doing stuff like that!" she protested.  
  
"You make a good point, we ARE Head Boy and Girl, so we deserve a little time off, and there's no way they'll catch us."  
  
"Of course they'll catch us, there are people everywhere!"  
  
"Evans, Evans, Evans, there actually are some things about this school that you don't know about," said James as he led her along a corridor, the rest of the gang following behind them. James led them all up to the third floor corridor and to a statue of a one-eyed witch with a hump. James pulled out his wand and tapped the statue saying, "Dissendium!" The statue sprang to life, revealing a hole where the witch's hump had been.  
  
Lily and Raven gasped. "James!" hissed Lily. "Did you do this?"  
  
"Nah, it was here, we just found it," reassured Sirius.  
  
One by one they all climbed in. They each lit their wands when they reached the bottom and started walking along the dirt path. The path twisted and turned for a long time, and then finally ascended up into the cellar of Honeyduke's in Hogsmeade.  
  
"It'll be a job getting us all out not being seen without the cloak," said Remus, soberly.  
  
"Wait," said Sirius, flinging his hand out to bring them all to a hault. Sirius crawled on his hands and knees past the counter and stood up casually, pretending to look at some sugar quills. "Excuse me, sir?" he said to the shopkeeper behind the counter. "How much are these..." he purposefully spilled an entire barrel of Bertie Bott's over the counter and onto the floor. "Oh...I'm sorry." The shopkeeper sighed and went to the backroom to get his wand. Sirius signaled frantically for them to come out of the basement while he was gone for a few seconds. They all quickly crawled up the steps and out the front door, Sirius right behind them.  
  
"Sirius, that was terrible! Now he has to pick all those up himself!" scolded Lily.  
  
"He has a wand, doesn't he?" Sirius defended himself and gave her a smile.  
  
"C'mon, let's go get some Butterbeer!" suggested James.  
  
Raven stopped dead. "Oh no! No, no, no, no! Sirius can't handle his Butterbeer, and I am not putting up with that again!"  
  
They all laughed. "Hey, let's go into the fruit market!" exclaimed Sirius excitedly.  
  
"What? Why?" asked Raven, giving Lily a confused look.  
  
"Oh yeah! I got some new ideas this time!" agreed James.  
  
They four boys entered and all gathered around Remus' watch. Remus held it out for them all to see and when the second hand was on the twelve he said, "Aaaaand...go!"  
  
Sirius sprinted off in one direction, James sprinted off in another, and Peter stared after both of them for a second and made his mind up to follow James. Lily and Raven watched in confusion and then gave Remus a questioning look.  
  
Remus shrugged his shoulders. "Everytime we come in here James and Sirius have this contest to see who gets thrown out first. Sirius has the record at eight seconds."  
  
Lily and Raven looked at each other and rolled their eyes. "I'll bet he does," said Raven.  
  
Suddenly they heard a shout from the direction Sirius had run. They saw three men coming around the corner of an aisle, one was Sirius, the two others were on either side of him, carrying him by the arms. Sirius had a huge grin plastered on his face.   
  
The store manager made their number four. He ran alongside them, yelling and pointing his finger at Sirius. "This the last time you come in here! Melons not to be used for dat! Get and stay out!"  
  
The two men hurled Sirius into the air. He tucked his head under as he hit the ground and did a somersault and stood up in front of Remus and the girls. The three of them stared at him with their mouths open. "...Well?????" He asked Remus.  
  
"Oh! Uh..." Remus looked down at his watch. "Twelve seconds."  
  
"Dammit!" yelled Sirius. "All that for nothin!"  
  
Remus sent up blue sparks with his wand and from the direction James had gone, they heard a groan. James and Peter trudged through their aisle and back to their friends at the door. "Wha'd you do?" asked James, turning to Sirius.  
  
Sirius grinned deviously. "The manager was training some new girl in and she was stacking some melons in a pile, so I grabbed two of them and held them up like this," he put his hands against his chest, "and asked her how to tell if they were ripe."  
  
They all laughed. "It really doesn't take that much to get thrown out of here. Did you break the record?" asked James.  
  
"Nah, twelve seconds," he shrugged.  
  
"Tough shit," said James, patting Sirius on the back.  
  
A/N: HOPE YOU LIKED IT. PLEASE REVIEW! THANX, I LUV YOU GUYS! 


	26. Chapter 26

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is listening to, singing, or dancing to. In this chapter there is, "Hide Your Love" by Jonny Lang. If you people don't know who Jonny Lang is, you need to buy his newest CD, Long Time Coming, or at least try to download some of his songs. You'll fall in love. It's so amazing!  
  
Random Thought #1: "Courage of the heart is very rare. The stone has a power when it's there." ~The Secret of NIMH  
  
Random Thought #2: "The time has come for someone to put his foot down. And that foot is me..." ~Animal House  
  
A/N: SORRY IF ANY OF YOU WERE DISAPPOINTED WITH CHAPTER 26 ACTUALLY BEING CHAPTER 11. I'VE BEEN SO BUSY WITH SCHOOL AND PUPPETS AND VALENTINE'S DAY AND I WANTED TO UPDATE BEFORE I WENT AWAY FOR THE WEEKEND, BUT THAT WAS ALL I HAD DONE. I SHOULD BE GETTING BACK TO NORMAL HERE AND I'M TRYING TO WORK ON REWRITING RENEGADES, TOO. IN CASE ANY OF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED WITH RENEGADES, ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS GAVE ME THE FIRST TWO CHAPTERS OF IT ON A DISK AND TOLD ME TO REWRITE IT PUTTING RAVEN IN IT. I DID, AND THEN I FOUND OUT AFTER I HAD POSTED IT THAT IT ACTUALLY WASN'T WRITTEN BY MY BEST FRIEND, IT WAS WRITTEN BY METRODWELLER ON FANFICTION.NET. SO IF YOU LIKED RENEGADES, I BET YOU'LL FIND SOME SIMILARITIES IF YOU READ "SOMEWHERE WARM" BY METRODWELLER...ACTUALLY, YOU'LL FIND ALMOST THE EXACT SAME FIRST TWO CHAPTERS CUZ I THOUGHT I HAD PERMISSION TO USE THEM. ANYWAYS, I EMAILED METRODWELLER EXPLAINING EVERYTHING, SO WE'RE COOL NOW. SHE EVEN GAVE ME PERMISSION TO KEEP WRITING IT, BUT I WANT TO CHANGE THE FIRST TWO CHAPTERS SO THEY'RE NOT PLAGAIRIZING HERS. IF YOU DO READ HER FANFIC AND REVIEW IT, TELL HER I SENT YOU CUZ I FEEL SO BAD THAT THIS HAPPENED AND I WANT TO MAKE IT UP TO HER. SORRY FOR THE LONG AUTHOR'S NOTE, ON TO CHAPTER 26...  
  
Chapter 26 - October 23rd  
  
"Padfoot," James lightly shook Sirius' shoulder.  
  
Sirius rolled over on his back, still asleep, mumbling, "Are you gonna eat that?...Careful with that hammer...The sea monkey has my money..."  
  
(A/N: SORRY, MY COUSIN'S WATCHING FINDING NEMO WHILE I'M TRYING TO WRITE.)  
  
James rolled his eyes and shook him more forcefully, "Sirius!"  
  
Sirius shot up in bed, "I didn't do it!"  
  
"Raven didn't come to breakfast and neither did you. Is she under there somewhere?"  
  
Rubbing his eyes, Sirius was suddenly awake. "I haven't seen her since last night in the common room." Adjusting his sweatpants, he jumped out of bed and threw on a t-shirt. "Let's go check her room."  
  
James followed Sirius down the stairs. Sirius tapped the wall and Lucy's portrait appeared.   
  
"Rave in there?" he asked her.  
  
Lucy answered, "Well hello, Sirius. She's not feeling well; she's asleep."  
  
"Can we see her, please?" asked James.  
  
The portrait slid up and the two of them entered. Raven was snoring loudly and since she didn't usually snore, James and Sirius guessed she had a cold. Sirius sat on the edge of the bed next to her and pushed her hair off of her face. She groaned slightly and opened her eyes.  
  
"Hi," he said. "You sick?"  
  
Raven yawned and rolled onto her back. "I dink I caught someding ad pracdice lasd nighd." Her nose was stuffed up, making her words distorted. (She said, "I think I caught something at practice last night," just in case you didn't get it.)  
  
Sirius and James both gave a little laugh. "C'mon, we'll take you down to the hospital wing?" asked Sirius.  
  
Raven sat up quickly. "Doh! Pomfrey'll jusd gib me some disgusding potion da drink and id won'd help ad all. And den she won'd led me see anyone, and I dink I'll jusd sday here." She laid back down and rolled back over on her side. ("No, Pomfrey'll just give me some disgusting potion to drink and it won't help at all. And then she won't let me see anyone, and I think I'll just stay here.")  
  
"Okay. Want me to stay with you?"  
  
Raven shook her head. "I'm jusd gonna sleep all day." (I think you can figure that one out.)  
  
"I'll sleep with you," he said, earning a disgusted stare from James. "You know what I mean, Prongs."  
  
"Do whad you wand," she replied, scooting over to the other side of the bed. ("Do what you want.")  
  
Sirius climed in with her and pulled up the covers around her.  
  
"What about me?" whined James.  
  
Moving over a little more, Sirius patted the empty space next to him. James made a motion to get in but then pulled back and laughed.   
  
"No room. I guess I'll hafta go to class."  
  
The portrait opened again and Lily, Remus, and Peter walked in.  
  
"Ooh, sick day?" asked Remus.  
  
"Raven doesn't feel good," explained Sirius.  
  
"And I suppose you don't either?"  
  
"I feel fine; I'm keeping her company." He glanced at the alarm clock by her bed. "You guys are gonna be late. Don't forget to take down everything Pitstain says for us. You know I hang on his every word."  
  
"It's Pintaine!" corrected Lily.  
  
"Isn't that what I said?" asked Sirius, trying not to grin.  
  
(A/N: THAT WAS FROM AN EPISODE OF FRIENDS, HEHE.)  
  
"Have a nice nap," said Peter as the portrait opened and they all exited.  
  
"Feel better, Rave," added Lily.  
  
"Dank you." She turned to Sirius. "Maybe you should jusd go do class. I jusd feel like sleeping."  
  
"Okay, that's getting annoying. At least let me sneak down to the hospital wing and get some decongestant potion."  
  
"Okay." Raven reached under her pillow and pulled out her invisibility cloak.  
  
Sirius took the cloak and whipped it around his shoulders, making only his head visable. "I'll be right back," he said as he leaned down to peck her on the lips before becoming completely invisible and leaving the room. A few minutes later, he threw off the invisibility cloak to find Raven snoring loudly again. He smiled as he sat on the bed and lifted her upper body up to lean against him. She didn't wake, she simply snuggled into his chest and grasped his t-shirt like a blanket. Sirius rolled his eyes up into his head as he felt her breath on his neck. A shiver went down through his body and he blushed as he realized her right breast was pressed up against his side and her left was resting on him. She was wearing one of those sporty black spagetti string tops. He ran his fingers down her arm before he shook her gently. She took a sharp breath in and lifted her head a few inches off of his chest.  
  
"How'd you ged here?" she asked, smiling up at him.  
  
He decided to tease her. "I've been here all night. Here, drink this," he handed her a cup of the decongestant potion.  
  
Raven drank it down in one gulp and her nose cleared instantly. "What do you mean you've been here all night? You don't mean..."  
  
Sirius put on a sincere little smirk. "It was a magical night. You made sounds I've never heard a woman make before."  
  
Raven's eyes widened and she sat up a little more. How could she have done it with him and not remembered it? "We...we didn't..."   
  
"Well, not physically, no, but spiritually you were the best I've ever had," he said as he gave her a sexy smile.  
  
Raven let out a sigh of relief. "Oh...whew."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Well, I'm relieved. I mean, that would suck if the first time we did it I didn't even remember it, especially since you're supposed to be so great and--"  
  
"Wait, what? Who told you that?"  
  
"Dulcy Warner."  
  
Sirius squinted and looked upward. "Oh yeah. Really, she said that?"  
  
"Yeah...but, if it's not true..."  
  
"No! No, no, it's true! Every word!" said Sirius, quickly. He leaned in to kiss her, but she pushed him away.  
  
"I might be contagious, Sirius. I don't want you to catch anything."  
  
"I don't care."  
  
"You don't care? What if I have pneumonia and we both die?"  
  
Sirius grinned at her. "If I don't kiss you I die anyway."  
  
A smile slowly spread across Raven's lips and she laughed. "Okay, we're starting to sound like Lily and James here."  
  
"You think they're in love yet?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Oh yeah, they definitely both love each other. I just don't know if they've told each other yet. Ya know, cuz it's easy to feel it, but sometimes they don't say it right away."  
  
"Yeah, that happens a lot," agreed Sirius, thinking about his feelings for Raven.  
  
Raven yawned and tugged on Sirius' shirt. "C'mon, let's go back to sleep." She leaned over and flicked on her CD player.   
  
(A/N: I CAN'T REMEMBER IF I EVER SAID THIS BUT I OBVIOUSLY DON'T CARE ABOUT THE WHOLE "NO ELECTRONICS AT HOGWARTS" THING AND IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME THAT MY FANFIC DIFFERENTIATES FROM THE BOOKS A LITTLE BIT. IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT, PRETEND THIS DIDN'T HAPPEN OR SOMETHING, LOL. IT'S JUST THAT MY LIFE IS FILLED WITH MUSIC AND MOVIES AND I DON'T SEE HOW ANYONE, WIZARD OR MUGGLE, COULD LIVE WITHOUT THEM.)   
  
Jonny Lang's voice filled the room. "Try every single day. I know you're worth the wait. Am I getting closer or further away? Somewhere behind your eyes I know my answer lies. But you won't release it. I wish you would try to open up and let me see inside. Down, deep in your heart. I want to be down where you hide your love for me. Cuz I've got to go, I've got to be. Let me inside down where you hide your love for me. Around and round we go, circle's all I know. Deeper and deeper, endless and slow. Everywhere I turn, the same old lessoned learned. Over and over, I just get burned. So bring me down, deep in your heart. I want to be down where you hide your love for me. Cuz I've got to go, I've got to be. Let me inside down where you hide your love for me. No, there's nothing you can say that's ever gonna make me change. I'll always feel this way..."  
  
When Sirius woke up and looked at the clock he smiled. He shook Raven awake. "Raven."  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"I have an idea."  
  
33333333333333333333  
  
"Hi, Lucy," said James, "are they in there?"  
  
"I think so," she told him as her portrait slid up.  
  
James stopped in the doorway as his eyes fell on Raven's bed. The blankets were pulled up to the middle of her bare back and she was sleeping with her arms across Sirius' chest. There were clothes scattered around the room as if they had been thrown off.  
  
"Oh my God!" he said, louder than he'd planned to. Raven and Sirius jerked their heads up. "You said you hadn't done anything yet!" He started backing out the door.  
  
The two of them burst into laughter. "James, get back here," said Raven, whipping off the covers.  
  
James quickly shielded his eyes and then peeked out beneath his fingers. He let his hands drop to his sides. Raven was wearing a strapless top and they both had pants on.  
  
"What the...you guys...you need to stop with all this pranking!...No one's ever gonna take you seriously!"  
  
"That's our plan," said Sirius.  
  
"I'll be right back; I'm gonna go grab a sandwich quick," said Raven as she disappeared around the corner.  
  
"She feeling better then?" asked James.  
  
"I guess."  
  
"Padfoot, since we're alone, I need to tell you something," started James.  
  
"Um...let me guess, break her heart a--"  
  
"And I'll break your face," James finished for him.  
  
"I don't plan on it, Prongs."  
  
"I mean it. And...well, when you actually do get some action, for once keep it to yourself, okay? She's my best friend; I don't wanna know."  
  
"Oh come on! I gotta tell someone!" protested Sirius.  
  
"Tell Peter. He'll love it."  
  
"Yeah, he would," Sirius rolled his eyes.  
  
A/N: SORRY, THIS IS KIND OF JUST A FILLER CHAPTER. I DIDN'T HAVE ANY GOOD IDEAS. PLEASE REVIEW, IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO GET REVIEWS! 


	27. Chapter 27

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is listening to, singing, or dancing to. In this chapter there is, "Invincible" by Pat Benatar.  
  
Random Thought #1: "You belong among the wildflowers. You belong in a boat out at sea. Sail away; kill off the hours. You belong somewhere you feel free." ~"Wildflowers" by Tom Petty.  
  
Random Thought #2: "Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear...mmhmm!" ~Lucas (Rory Cochrane) from Empire Records.  
  
A/N: THANX FOR THE REVIEWS, GUYS. YOU'RE REALLY GREAT. I HAVE SPRING BREAK NEXT WEEK, SO HOPEFULLY I'LL BE ABLE TO GET MORE THAN ONE CHAPTER DONE FOR THIS AND RENEGADE. KEEP THE REVIEWS COMIN, THEY MOTIVATE ME TO WRITE FASTER.  
  
Chapter 27 - November 4th  
  
"Black, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to kill your cousin!" Raven said, storming into the common room and sitting next to Sirius in a huff.  
  
"Bellatrix? That's fine with me," Sirius teased. "Wha'd she do?  
  
"She frickin tripped me!"  
  
"She tripped you? That's it? Consider yourself lucky!"  
  
"Oh, thank you." Raven rolled her eyes. "She jinxed the carpet so it rose up when I stepped on it and I almost broke my ankle!"  
  
"You fall on your ass?"  
  
Raven laughed. "No, some guy from Hufflepuff caught me in time. Remind me of what I ever did to her."  
  
"Ah, she's just jealous of you."  
  
"Jealous?" asked Raven. "Of what?"  
  
"Of everything you have above her."  
  
"Such as? I have you guys, that's it."  
  
"That's one thing. And you're better at Quiddich; you can sing, I swear, she can't sing a note!; you're beautiful; you outwit her everytime she tries to insult you."  
  
"Well, that's bullshit! I've haven't played against her in Quiddich yet, so I don't know if she's better than me, and she's prettier than I am!"  
  
"She is not!" protested Sirius.  
  
"I think she is. Her hair's longer, and--"  
  
"Ratty! And her eyes are so mean, and her face is always all scrunched up like she just smelled dog shit, ya know?" Sirius scrunched up his face, imitating his cousin.  
  
Raven snorted. "At least her parents aren't dead...are they?"  
  
"No," answered Sirius, "but I can't say I'd miss them."  
  
Raven whacked Sirius lightly across the chest. "Sirius, don't be an ass."  
  
"Raven, they're the assholes! My entire family! I'm praying to God you never have to meet my mother. Andromeda's the only nice one. She's Bella's oldest sister.  
  
"Your mum wouldn't like me, eh?"  
  
"Oh, she'd like you just fine at first; you're a pure blood. But when she finds out you're friends with a 'mudblood' like Lily, she'll look past your bloodline. Funny how they can look past a pure blood who happens to think muggle borns are the same as everyone else, and then they can't look past a muggle born with more talent than a pure blood. Thank God my mum doesn't know Moony's a werewolf." Sirius waved his hand in the air. "Anyways, I don't live there anymore, so I don't care," he said, unconvincingly.  
  
"Yes, you do," Raven said, meeting eyes with him.  
  
Sirius looked back into Raven's eyes, but didn't disagree with her. "So you want me to beat her up?"  
  
Raven rose her eyebrows. "Your mum?"  
  
"No! Bellatrix!"  
  
"Oh! Nah, I just thought you'd get a kick out of me almost falling on my ass."  
  
"Right you are!" he said, leaning to give her a quick peck on the lips.  
  
"Where in the bloody hell are they?" yelled James, bursting into the tower and searching the common room. He spotted Raven and Sirius on the couch by the fireplace.  
  
"Potter!" called Sirius. "Whatcha got your panties in a twist for?"  
  
"Guys! The game!" James rose his hands in the air and waved them around.  
  
"Oh shit!" said Raven and Sirius in unison as they got up off the couch in a split-second and trampled James through the portrait hole.  
  
"Has Wood soiled himself yet?" asked Raven as she panted down the stairs, James and Sirius on her heels.  
  
"I sincerely hope not; he's already in uniform," James answered.  
  
When they entered the Gryffindor locker room, a very deranged Quiddich captain rounded on them. "Where the hell have you two been? Did you forget we have a game today?"  
  
"Er...yes," answered Sirius. He pushed Raven forward, knowing she could sweet talk him.  
  
"We're really sorry, Justin, it's just that...well, I wanted to go over that Wronski Feint thing one more time with Sirius, ya know, so I could surprise you. I'm sorry we were late; I promise it won't happen again," she batted her eyelashes at him.  
  
Justin smiled at her. "You're forgiven. But I promised Madam Hooch I'd never let you even attempt that Wronski Feint again."  
  
"Well, I got it down now. You want me to unlearn it?"  
  
Justin smiled again and touched his finger to her chin. "That's my girl."  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes as he threw his shirt at Justin and pulled on his Quiddich robes.  
  
"Well, get dressed," Justin said to Raven and James. They were all dressed in time to hear Justin's battle speech. "Alright, Gryffindors, this is our second match against Slytherin. We beat them last time, but that doesn't mean we will this time without a good fight. Raven, don't use the Wronski Feint unless you have to. Save that for Bellatrix when we play Slytherin in the final showdown."   
  
Raven nodded. "That is, if we beat Ravenclaw today and Slytherin beats Hufflepuff next Saturday."  
  
"They will, and we'd better. Black, block for Raven. Fletcher, block for the chasers. Got it?"   
  
Sirius and Mundungus nodded.   
  
"But who's gonna block for you, Woody?" asked James, hiding his laugh.  
  
"I'll be fine. Potter, Laurel, Jess, remember those plays we went over, and don't break formation for anything!" James, Laurel, and Jessica nodded.  
  
"And you'll do your best too, right Justin?" asked Sirius.  
  
Justin winked. "Raven, the song."  
  
Raven rolled her eyes as she hit play on her CD player. The seven Gryffindor players closed their eyes and listened to the song before they rode onto the field, as was their ritual.  
  
"This bloody road remains a mystery. This sudden darkness fills the air. What are we waitin for? Won't anybody help us? What are we waitin for? We can't afford to be innocent. Stand up and face the enemy. It's a do or die situation. We will be invincible! This shattered dream you cannot justify. We're gonna scream until we're satisfied. What are we runnin for? We've got the right to be angry. What are we runnin for? When there's nowhere we can run to anymore. We can't afford to be innocent. Stand up and face the enemy. It's a do or die situation. We will be invincible! And with the power of conviction there is no sacrifice. It's a do or die situation. We will be invincible!"  
  
Listening, Justin stood in the middle of the group with his eyes closed. When the song was over, he raisied his hands in the air, pointing his fingers and shaking them. "Okay, let's ride!" The seven of them got onto their brooms and rose out into the stadium.  
  
A/N: TEEHEE, GONE IN 60 SECONDS. I LUV THAT MOVIE. NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE UP SOON AFTER I UPDATE RENEGADE. HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	28. Chapter 28

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Random Thought #1: "Life is a storm. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes." ~The Count of Monte Cristo  
  
Random Thought #2: "I'm gonna go out and I'm gonna get the world by the tail and wrap it around and pull it down and put it in my pocket!" ~Matt Foley (Chris Farley) in SNL sketch, "Motivational Speaker."  
  
A/N: HI EVERYBODY...WOW, FANFICTION.NET IS ACTING WEIRD! FIRST I WASN'T GETTING ANY OF MY REVIEWS OR AUTHOR ALERTS ON MY EMAIL. I COULD SEE MY REVIEW COUNT GO UP, BUT THEY WEREN'T SHOWING UP ON MY REVIEW PAGE, AND I WASN'T GETTING EMAILS. AND NOW I'M GETTING LIKE 10 COPIES OF EACH REVIEW. IS THAT HAPPENING TO ANYONE ELSE? GRR, IT'S MAKING ME MAD! BUT I'M GONNA KEEP UPDATING AS LONG AS YOU KEEP REVIEWING EVEN IF I DON'T GET ALL MY REVIEWS RIGHT AWAY.  
  
Chapter 28 - November 6th   
  
Raven stormed into the common room, closely followed by Sirius.   
  
"I cannot believe you were sitting there having a decent conversation with my brother! After everything he's done to me, my own girlfriend can't keep her hands off him!"  
  
Raven spun around and narrowed her eyes on Sirius. "Excuse me? I didn't have my hands anywhere near him! He asked me if I knew where you were. I was about to tell him that you had detention after McGonagall's class when you came running up, accusing me of 'fraternizing with the enemy!'"  
  
Sirius laughed. "Why the hell would he care where I was?"  
  
"He said he needed to talk to you. You pulled me away before I could--"  
  
"Regulus doesn't want anything to do with me! How stupid do you think I am?"  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "How stupid is there?"  
  
"What, do you like him now or something? Cuz if you really want Regulus, maybe you should stop barking up the wrong tree!"  
  
"And maybe you should just stop barking altogether!" Raven calmly but quickly strode to her portrait and it slammed down after her.  
  
Lily was sitting by the fire working on her transfiguration essay. "Did that just happen? You honestly think she wants your brother?"  
  
Sirius sighed and sat down next to her. "No. But why would she lie about Regulus wanting to talk to me?"  
  
"I don't know, Sirius, maybe she was telling the truth."  
  
Sirius scoffed. "He hasn't wanted to talk to me since he was eleven."  
  
"Well, why don't you just go ask him instead of yelling at Raven about it!"  
  
"Little too late for that, isn't it?"  
  
Lily smiled sympathetically at him. "Maybe Raven's right. Perhaps you *should* just stop barking altogether."  
  
"Yeah. I'm gonna go talk to my dipshit brother now," Sirius got up and then turned back to Lily. "Speaking of dipshits, where's James?"  
  
"Helping Peter with something upstairs."  
  
Sirius nodded and proceeded out of the common room. He found Regulus in the second floor corridor and *accidentally* ran into him. "Sorry...oh, it's you. Never mind."  
  
"Sirius, I gotta talk to you. I got an owl from mum today."  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes and started to walk away. "I care."  
  
"Dad's sick." Sirius turned back around. "He's in St. Mungo's. Anyway, I just thought you'd wanna know," said Regulus, turning and heading for the stairs.  
  
"He's not gonna die or anything, is he?" asked Sirius.  
  
"No," said Regulus. "Sorry to disappoint you."  
  
When Sirius stepped back into the common room, he found it empty. He was late for class. He half sprinted to the dungeons and grabbed a seat at the end of the row next to James without Pitstain noticing. Raven wasn't there. "Where's Rave?" he whispered to James.  
  
"She said she'd be here in a second."  
  
She walked in a few minutes later. Sirius leaned back in his chair, blocking her way into their row. She cleared her throat. "Move, Pitstain's gonna see me."  
  
He tapped his lip with his finger. "Gotta pay the toll."  
  
Raven's face remained expressionless. "You want me to punch you in the face?" She kicked the back of his chair and it quickly snapped forward, sending him into the desk with a thud. Raven took her seat next to Lily. Sirius doubled over onto the desk.  
  
"Not feeling well, Mr. Black?" asked Pitstain, hearing the thud and turning around.  
  
"Uh...no."  
  
"Go see the nurse before you sick up."  
  
Sirius tried not to laugh as he shakily got up from his chair and ambled slowly out of the room. Once the door had closed behind him he straightened up and smiled. He went up to the owlery and found Wheaton, his eagle owl. With Wheaton perched on his shoulder, he headed back to the common room in search of some paper. When Gryffindors started filing back into the common room after their classes were over, he read over what he had written:  
  
Medda,  
  
How are you and Ted? Sorry, that's supposed to be a secret, right? Do you know anything about my dad? Regulus just told me that he was sick. Is it bad? I just wanted to know. If you know anything, can you send a message back with Wheaton? I know I'm not 'part of the family anymore,' but I just wanted you to know that it's not because of you. I miss you.  
  
Love, your cousin,  
  
Sirius  
  
Raven was reading over his shoulder. "Your dad's sick?" She sat next to him.  
  
"That's what Regulus had to talk to me about. I'm sorry."  
  
Raven shook her head. "Me too." She ran her hand across his stomach where he'd hit the desk. "Does it hurt?"  
  
Sirius smiled. "Nah, my six pack broke my fall."  
  
She rolled her eyes. "Andromeda?"  
  
"Medda. Yeah. She's the only one in the family I actually miss. But she's actually engaged to a muggle, Ted Tonks. No one's supposed to know yet. She told me the day before I left. I'm just hoping she'll know something about my dad."  
  
"So...what are you gonna do if it's bad?"  
  
"I haven't figured that out yet. Let's not talk about it." Sirius tied his letter to Wheaton's leg and he flew out the window.  
  
Raven looked over and saw Lily in James' lap, laughing at something he was telling her. "What do you think of them?"  
  
"I think James is gettin ready to slide into home."  
  
Raven smacked Sirius' arm. "They ever tell you exactly how they got together?"  
  
Sirius shook his head. "I figured you set it all up and everything."  
  
"No. I mean, I gave James a few pointers and shoved Lily in the right direction, but that's all. They got together on their own."  
  
"And what exactly did you tell him?"  
  
Raven smiled as she remembered cornering James and telling him what he was doing wrong.   
  
(A/N: FELT LIKE DOING A LITTLE FLASHBACK) ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven pushed James into the wall and grabbed him by the collar. "What are you doing? You're not ready yet. You go up to her now and you're gonna act like an idiot, like you always do."  
  
"Well, tell me how not to act then!" said James, clearly frightened by being backed into a wall by his best friend.  
  
"To start with, don't mess up your hair; it doesn't need it, believe me."  
  
"But--"  
  
Raven held up her hand to silence him. "Don't act like she's the luckiest girl in the world for having the priveledge of talking to you, and most importantly, don't tell her how perfect you are."  
  
"So you're saying...people think...I'm perfect?"  
  
Raven sighed.  
  
"I'm kidding. Okay, I can do that. You really think I'm that cocky?"  
  
"No, you're not at all. It's just that when you're around Lily, you don't know what to do, so you show off. You can't do that. It clearly doesn't work on her. Find out something about her instead of trying to tell her every little detail about you. And stop calling her Evans."  
  
"I think she likes it."  
  
"No, James she doesn't. Do you call me McKinnon? Do I call you Potter? Not unless I'm pissed off at you. Ya got it?"  
  
"Yeah, I'll try."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Sirius laughed. "Well, he must have eventually gotten it down."  
  
"Well, keep in mind that she liked him the whole time, too. She just never would admit it. I guess when he finally started acting decent to her, she gave in."  
  
"You mean kinda like how you gave fell for me?" asked Sirius, raising her head by lifting her chin with his finger.  
  
"Get over yourself. I'm using you to get to Regulus."  
  
Sirius smiled fakely. "That was below the belt. Try to keep the gloves up."   
  
They both looked over at James and Lily again. James pecked Lily lightly on the lips.   
  
Sirius turned back to Raven. "Excuse me, does my tongue taste funny to you?"  
  
Raven rolled her eyes and kissed him.  
  
A/N: THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO: RAVEN'S BIRTHDAY'S COMING UP, MORE THAN JUST PG-13 RELATIONSHIPS, AND ANOTHER TRIP TO RAVEN'S COTTAGE. HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	29. Chapter 29

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Random Thought #1: "Maybe I'm just dreamin, but I know dreams come true. And I'm still here believin that God made me for you. If we could just start over, get back where we began. We're better off together; it doesn't have to end. Goodbye, is this how you want it? I'll leave, but I don't want to go. I'll wait, but I can't wait forever for you to say goodbye." ~"Goodbye Letter" by Jonny Lang.  
  
Random Thought #2: "A bell is no bell till you ring it. A song is no song till you sing it. And love in your heart wasn't put there to stay. Love isn't love till you give it away." ~Oscar Hammerstein.  
  
A/N: JUST TO LET EVERYONE KNOW, MY PIECE OF SHIT COMPUTER HAS CRASHED. IT'S A BRAND NEW COMPUTER AND I DON'T THINK THE MOTHERBOARD IS COMPATIBLE WITH THE ACTUAL PC, IF ANYONE KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANS OR CARES. SO I DON'T HAVE A COMPUTER AT HOME BECAUSE MY BROTHER'S HASN'T BEEN WORKING EITHER. I HAVE COLLEGE CLASSES MONDAY THROUGH THURSDAY, SO I CAN STILL UPDATE MY CHAPTERS, BUT I HAVE TO DO ALL MY WRITING HERE OR AT WORK. I JUST WANTED TO WARN YOU IN CASE THE PACE SLOWS DOWN A BIT. HOPEFULLY, IT WON'T AT ALL AND I'LL HAVE MY COMPUTER BACK BY NEXT WEEK, BUT YA NEVER KNOW. I STILL NEED IDEAS FOR RAVEN'S BIRTHDAY CUZ MY BEST FRIEND CAMERON, WHO SIRIUS IS BASED ON BY THE WAY, WON'T LET ME USE WHAT HE DID FOR ME ON VALENTINE'S DAY. IF YOU HAVE ANY, FEEL FREE TO SEND IT IN YOUR REVIEW OR IM ME IF I GET MY COMPUTER BACK AND I'M ON.  
  
Chapter 29 - November 7th  
  
James was arguing with Lucy. "Luce, please? C'mon, it's really important; I have to talk to her."  
  
Lucy glanced behind her, through the wall, nervously. "Um...it's late. She's...sleeping!"  
  
James looked at his watch. "It's only 11:30; she's sleeping?"  
  
"Uh..."  
  
"She'll understand, Luce. I really need to talk to her."  
  
"...Fine," Lucy gave in, her portrait sliding up reluctantly.  
  
James walked two steps into Raven's room and stopped. Sirius was on top of Raven on her bed and they were kissing heavily. James cleared his throat. Sirius and Raven slowly broke apart and looked up at him. James folded his arms over his chest.  
  
"No, James, I don't think Lily's in here. Anything else you wanted?" said Sirius nonchalantly, propping himself up with his arms.  
  
"I need to talk to Rave...alone," he said.  
  
Raven pushed Sirius off of her and sat up, looking with concern at James. "Everything okay?"  
  
"Oh yeah, I just need to ask you something."  
  
"But Prongs--"  
  
"Goodnight, Sirius," Raven interrupted him.  
  
Sirius gave her a look and then got off the bed. "Goodnight." He kissed her quickly and then left the room.  
  
"Is it about Sirius?" asked Raven, patting the bed next to her.  
  
James sat. "No, I was just wondering something about Lily."  
  
"Okay...what?"  
  
"Well...is she a virgin?"  
  
Raven laughed lightly. "Why are you asking me? Why don't you ask your girlfriend?"  
  
"I can't ask her that!"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Cuz then she'll think I wanna do it!" screeched James.  
  
"Well...don't you?"  
  
James smiled and looked at Raven mischievously. "Well, yeah...but not until she's ready. I just, I can't ask her. Not now. I just wanted to know. You don't happen to know, do you?"  
  
"Of course I know; she's my best friend."  
  
"So...???"  
  
"Seriously? How come you even have to ask?"  
  
"Well that's what I thought, but I don't know."  
  
"So that's all you wanted?" asked Raven.  
  
"Uh, yeah. Sorry for...interrupting."  
  
Raven smiled. "It's okay. I was gonna kick him out in a few minutes anyway."  
  
"Sure you were," said James, shooting her a knowing look.  
  
"I was! Now you get to be the bad guy."  
  
"And I'm sure I'll get it when I go upstairs." James stood up. "Goodnight, Minx."  
  
"Night." As the portrait closed, Raven addressed Lucy. "A little warning next time, maybe?"  
  
"I thought it was funny," replied Lucy, grinning.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes.  
  
James headed up to the boys' dormitories. He went to his bed and put on his pajamas. He pulled back the covers and stared. "What the..."  
  
Sirius, Remus, and Peter started chuckling.  
  
"Padfoot!"  
  
"I didn't do it, I swear! It was Remus' idea!"  
  
"Moony?" James turned to Remus.  
  
Remus shrugged his shoulders as he laughed and looked at what was embroidered on James' blue pillowcase in white lettering.  
  
James looked back at Sirius.  
  
"C'mon, I don't know that spell!"  
  
"What I'm having trouble with, Padfoot, is why Remus would call me a 'Cockblocker.' He doesn't even have a girlfriend."  
  
"Okay, so he was very upset when I told him you kicked me out of Raven's room. I tried to stop him!" Sirius put on his most convincing innocent puppy dog face.  
  
James started to laugh, and Sirius broke into a smile. James chucked the 'Cockblocker' pillow at his face. Sirius caught the pillow and examined it. "Nice work, Moony, really."  
  
"Shut up, I know you did it, Padfoot!" said James.  
  
"Nuh-uh! I told you I didn't know how!...I threatened Moony to do it." Sirius looked extremely happy with himself.  
  
"Well, I didn't know you were going for the gold, or believe me, I would have waited until tomorrow," said James sounding a tad bit disgusted.  
  
"Get your mind out of the gutter, Potter! We were doing nothing of the sort!" Sirius got up from his own bed and sat eagerly on James'. "But you can make it up to me."  
  
James' eyes widened in mock-shock. "Sirius Padfoot Black! I am not doing that!"  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes. "You're not my type, Prongs. I need you to help me with something...all of you. Moony, Wormtail," Sirius beckoned his other two friends over to James' bed. The four of them each took a corner of the bed to sit at. Sirius leaned forward as he spoke. "Her birthday...any suggestions? I've never really cared enough about a girl to do that kind of thing."  
  
"Ya know, it is just beautiful that you can admit to that, Padfoot," teased Remus.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes and quickly lunged at Remus, sending him off the bed with a thud.   
  
Peter and Sirius laughed as Remus narrowed his eyes on Sirius. "I was only joking, you prat!" He got back up on the bed. "Now see if I help you with anything."  
  
"C'mon, Moony, I honestly don't know what to do."  
  
"Well, flowers, candy, jewelery..." started James.  
  
"No, no, no...those are too normal. Stuff like that isn't good enough for her! It would just make me look like a giant retard."  
  
"Don't call yourself a *giant* retard, Sirius. It wouldn't be fair to all the other retards," said Remus, trying to keep a straight face.  
  
"Alright, Moony, you just signed your own death warrant! You die, Lupin!" shouted Sirius, pulling out his wand and pointing it in Remus' face. Remus scrambled under the bed, but not before Sirius uttered his attack. "Keratinrouge!"  
  
The room went silent as Remus peeked out from under the bed...with hot pink hair, down to the roots!  
  
Sirius, James, and Peter fell over laughing as Remus ran to the nearest mirror. "Holy fuck!" he exclaimed, his hands going up to his head. "This better come out!"  
  
"Oh, it will..." said Sirius, coolly, "...in about a week."  
  
A/N: HEHE, I ALWAYS THOUGHT MOONY WOULD LOOK GOOD WITH PINK HAIR. PLEASE REVIEW! I NEED CHEERING UP AFTER MY COMPUTER'S BEEN BEING MEAN TO ME! I'M SORRY IT'S SO SHORT, BUT I WANTED TO UPDATE BEFORE I HAD TO GO HOME TO NO COMPUTER AND THIS IS WHAT I HAD SO FAR. SORRY! I PROMISE, A LONG ONE NEXT TIME. 


	30. Chapter 30

Marauder Mayhem  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Random Thought #1: I must say I found this one of the most humorous paragraphs in Order of the Phoenix: "Harry looked over his shoulder yet again and saw, to his delight, that Snape has settled himself on the grass in the dense shadows of a clump of bushes. He was as deeply immersed in the O.W.L. paper as ever, WHICH LEFT HARRY FREE TO SIT DOWN ON THE GRASS BETWEEN THE BEECH AND THE BUSHES AND WATCH THE FOURSOME UNDER THE TREE." ~JK Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Chapter 28, page 644 (American Version)  
  
Random Thought #2: Hehe. Want another one? I love Harry Potter innuendos! Oh, this is one of my favorites: "'Sometimes [the Room of Requirement] is there, and sometimes it is not, but when it appears, it is always equipped for the seeker's needs. Dobby has used it, sir,' said the elf, dropping his voice and looking guilty, 'when Winky has been very drunk.'"   
  
A/N: LIKE THOSE INNUENDOS, TEE-HEE! I SWEAR, HARRY POTTER IS DOWNRIGHT PORNOGRAPHIC...THAT IS, IF IT'S OUT OF CONTEXT AND INTERPRETED FROM THE GUTTER! IF YOU LIKE THOSE, I'LL DO SOME MORE NEXT CHAPTER AND ON RENEGADE. I CANNOT BELIEVE I'VE REACHED THIRTY CHAPTERS! YAY!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH TO ALL OF YOU WHO READ AND REVIEW MY STORY, AND THANK YOU ALSO TO THOSE WHO READ BUT ARE A LITTLE TOO SHY TO REVIEW. I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE. HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS CHAPTER.  
  
Chapter 30 - November 13th  
  
Raven opened her eyes and gasped. Her room looked as though it was snowing flower petals. There were rose petals of all colors suspended in midair through her entire room, ceiling to floor, as thick as a heavy snow. Getting up from her bed, she smiled from ear to ear, the petals brushing gently against her body as she walked through them. She suddenly stopped as she saw a line of red rose buds leading up in a line to the celing. She followed them up to a collage of colorful roses floating a foot from the ceiling spelling, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RAVE." Raven quickly threw on her uniform and robe and headed for the door.  
  
"Happy Birthday, Miss Raven!" said Lucy cheerfully as her portrait slid up.  
  
"Thank you, Lu--" Raven stopped and let out a shriek of pleasure.   
  
The common room was empty, but the utterly insane rose petal display didn't stop at her bedroom. There was a narrow trail leading out her door and through the common room to the portrait hole. Raven continued walking along the rose petal path in a daze. She crawled through the portrait hole and started to laugh as she saw the trail continuing down the stairs like bread crumbs, leading her through a maze. She passed several other students who were following the rose petals up the stairs, trying to find out where they began.  
  
"Happy Birthday, Raven," said Justin, coming from the fourth floor corridor and winking at her.  
  
Raven grabbed onto his arm for support. "Where is he?"  
  
"Where's who?" Justin asked mystically. Raven shook her head.  
  
When they came to the Great Hall, Raven paused. "Do I have to go in there?"  
  
"Don't you wanna see where the trail leads you?" asked Justin, giving her a push into the Hall.  
  
Everything went quiet. Raven closed her eyes for a moment and then started walking quickly to the end of the path, which led her to her seat between James and Sirius at the Gryffindor table. She sat down. Sirius glanced incuriously over his shoulder as she sat next to him. Apparently they were all trying to pretend they knew nothing about the rose petals that were suspended in midair just behind them.  
  
"Oh, morning, Minx," he said, normally. "Why are you all red?"  
  
Raven suddenly noticed that her face felt as though it were on fire. She linked her arm with his and leaned into him, whispering, "You're insane!"  
  
He turned and smiled widely at her. "Happy Birthday."  
  
Raven laughed. "Is it my birthday today? I completely forgot."  
  
"It better be!" said Sirius. He put the back of his hand to her cheek. "You look a little warm."  
  
"I am. How in the hell did you do all this?"  
  
Sirius shrugged. "It was all of us. We just levitated the petals."  
  
"All of you?" Raven stared at each of her friends. They were smiling and nodding at her. "You guys!..." she put her face in her hands as her eyes started to water, "thank you."  
  
"It was Sirius' idea, though," said James. "He put a sleeping charm on your bed so we could get in there and stuff."  
  
Raven looked lovingly over at Sirius as he was hastefully downing his cup of coffee. "You're drinking coffee?"  
  
"Yeah, well I need it. I've been up all night levitating damned rose petals," he said, smiling at her.  
  
"Aww," she said as she laid her head on his shoulder. She suddenly jumped up and tugged on his arm. "C'mon."  
  
"What?"  
  
She jerked her head towards the Great Hall entrance. Sirius got up and followed her.  
  
"Where are they goin?" asked James, suspiciously.  
  
"So when do we make Rave open her presents?" asked Lily excitedly.  
  
"After supper, probably," Remus answered her.  
  
"I can't believe you got her that, James! She's gonna kill you!" Lily rolled her eyes.  
  
""We always do it that way, Lil. We all pitch in on a really good present, and then we get a whole bunch of gag gifts that are either really funny or really useless. We do it for everyone's birthday. Remember how Raven got Sirius all those t-shirts on his birthday?"  
  
"Oh my God, those were hilarious!" remembered Remus.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Begin Flashback:  
  
Lily, James, Peter, Remus, Raven, and Sirius sat in a circle on the floor of James' basement. Sirius was wearing a tiny plastic tiara with fake jewels on it and a mischievous grin. He picked up one of the bags sitting in front of him and read the note:  
  
"'Just in case you ever run out of your own pick-up lines, or I punch you in the face and your teeth fall out, whereby you are not able to communicate pick-up lines verbally... Luv, Raven.'" Sirius looked at Raven dubiously and quickly untied the bow around the bag. He reached in and pulled out a black t-shirt, read what was printed on it, turned it over to read the back and started cracking up.  
  
"What? Let me see," said James, grabbing the t-shirt and holding it up so everyone could see it. He read the printed words out loud: "'You are the most beautiful woman in the world...'" He turned the shirt over. "'Fancy a fuck?'"  
  
The circle roared with laughter.  
  
Sirius felt the bag. "Oh shit, there's more. I don't know if I can take it." He pulled out the next black t-shirt and held it up for all to see.   
  
Remus read the shirt: "'Free breath-a-lizer test. Blow here.'" There was an arrow pointing down the shirt to the end. "Oh my God, Raven!"  
  
"What? I didn't make it!" she justified, shrugging her shoulders.  
  
Sirius laughed and threw it over his head.  
  
"There's one more," said Raven.  
  
"Goodie!" said Sirius, reaching quickly into the bag. The next t-shirt was white and Sirius read it aloud as he showed it to the rest of the group: "'Chick Magnet.' Well, that one's not too bad," he teased.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~End Flashback.  
  
Raven led Sirius down the hall into one of the independent study rooms of the library. She pushed him firmly but gently against the wall as soon as the door swung closed and attacked him with kisses.  
  
"I feel bad! I didn't do anything this huge for your birthday!"  
  
"Ha!" exclaimed Sirius. "First of all, we weren't going out, so you didn't have to. Secondly, yes you did! You got me a frickin flying motorbike!"  
  
"It was nothing. It was Josh's old one. All we did was give him 50 bucks and charm it to fly, and everyone pitched in!"  
  
"And what about the autographed Smashing Pumpkins CD's?" countered Sirius.  
  
Raven waved her hand in the air dissmissively. "Oh please, I've known Billy since forever and I knew they were your favorite."  
  
"It's okay, I have connections, too," said Sirius, evasively.  
  
"What does that mean?"  
  
"You'll see," said Sirius.  
  
Before Raven could try and get it out of him, his lips were on hers. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pulled him closer. There was suddenly a knock at the door and the two of them jumped apart.  
  
"What?" Sirius swiftly whipped open the door. The Headmaster was looking at him through his half-moon glasses with raised brows. Sirius forced a smile and an amiable attitude. "Hello, Professor Dumbledore."  
  
Dumbledore looked past Sirius to Raven and nodded his head. "I understand it's your birthday today, Ms. McKinnon. I hope you didn't find your rose path too overwhelming."  
  
"Oh, I did. I was just in the middle of giving Sirius my thanks," she smiled back innocently.  
  
"Yes." Dumbledore tried to hide his smirk. "Classes are beginning if the two of you were planning to attend this morning." He smiled again at Raven and then continued to amble jauntily down the hall.  
  
"Jesus, Minx, did you have to make it that obvious?" said Sirius, nudging Raven playfully in the ribs.  
  
"I think he knew what we were doing in here, Padfoot. I gotta go get my books; I'll meet you in class," said Raven, starting to head for the stairs.  
  
"I'll come with you," said Sirius, catching up to her. He reached for her hand and held it so he wouldn't lose her in the trail of roses.  
  
A/N: WHAT DO YOU THINK? TOO MUSHY? JUST WAIT, IT GETS WORSE, LOL. I'M HAVING A HARD TIME WRITING THE NEXT CHAPTER BECAUSE THINGS HAPPEN THAT I'M NOT TOO COMFORTABLE DESCRIBING IF I'M NOT BEING TOO SUBTLE. BUT I HAVE IT STARTED ALREADY, IT SHOULD BE UP THIS WEEKEND. HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER, PLEASE REVIEW! 


	31. Chapter 31

Marauder Mayhem  
  
A/N: OKAY, NOW THIS CHAPTER WAS VERY HARD FOR ME TO WRITE, SO DON'T BE TOO HARSH, PLEASE. DON'T READ PAST THE LITTLE "3333333..." SYMBOLS (THOSE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE HEARTS) IF SEXUAL MATERIAL OFFENDS YOU. IT'S NOT LIKE I DESCRIBE THE ACTUAL SEX, ONLY THE STUFF LEADING UP TO IT, REALLY, BUT I WANTED TO GIVE YOU THE OPTION.  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Random Thought #1: Did you like those innuendos last time? Alright, well here's some more: "'He's having a go at my mother!' Seamus yelled." ~JK Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, page 218. Out of context innuendos are so hilarious!  
  
Random Thought #2: "Harry's heart began to pump very fast indeed. Defense against external penetration?" (page 458) I actually spit out my coffee I was using to keep myself awake all night the first time I read that line.  
  
Songs: Sometimes I have songs that a character is singing or dancing to. In this chapter there is "Tuesday Morning" by Michelle Branch. And I just wanted to mention that I've been keeping track, and November 13th turns out to be a Monday, so this song fits perfectly!   
  
Chapter 31 - November 13th  
  
After dinner, everyone had pulled Raven up to the common room to open her presents. They sat on the floor, amongst the roses that had finally settled to the ground, in her room in a circle, waiting eagerly for her to pick her first present.   
  
Raven crossed her arms in front of her. "It's my birthday and I say I don't have to open them."  
  
"Then we'll keep you awake until midnight and at 12:01 it will no longer be your birthday and we can force you to open them," said Lily mechanically.  
  
Raven laughed. "Oh that's how it's gonna be, hey? Well, it's only 8:00, are you sure you wanna wait that long?" She sighed and picked up a present, surveying it with distrust. James and Sirius gave each other a mischievous wink as she tore open the parcel. She gave a loud shriek and before anyone could see what was inside, she quickly hid it behind her back. She looked directly at James. "You little prick!"  
  
James smiled widely, "Sirius and Lily have already seen it."  
  
"What is it?" asked Remus, interestedly.  
  
"Nothing!"  
  
Sirius quickly reached around her back with one hand and grabbed the picture free while tickling Raven's side with his other hand. He tossed it to Remus.  
  
Remus' mouth dropped open. "Raven, I didn't know you were so...photogenic!"  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "Somehow I thought you would be above this, Remus Lupin."  
  
Remus winked at Raven and then turned the picture frame around Peter could see it. The picture contained Raven at the age of about 4 or 5, stark naked, and dancing around James in the bathtub with suds flying in all directions of the room. Almost completely covered with bubbles, James was sitting down, applying suds to his chin to make a sort of Dumbledore-like beard.  
  
"James, that is just cruel!" reprimanded Lily.  
  
"Oh come on! She's only like 5 in that picture, she doesn't even have..." He trailed off as Lily gave him and icy stare.  
  
"Give it back!" said Raven, holding her hand out to Remus. She snatched it and threw it under her bed.  
  
"I thought it was cute," said Sirius, winking at her.  
  
"Well I hope you enjoyed it while you could cuz you're never gonna see that again," she teased.  
  
"'Cept for the next time we beat your ass at strip Quiddich," countered Sirius.  
  
"Would you two shut up so she can open her next present?" said Peter.  
  
Sirius gave James a look and then jerked his head toward the door. James took Lily's hand. "Lily, come here for a minute."  
  
"Why? I don't wanna miss Raven opening her presents."  
  
"We'll wait for ya, Lil," said Sirius reassuringly as James led her out of the portrait. As soon as the portrait closed, Sirius reached into a pocket of his robes and handed a package to Raven. "Quick, open this while Lily's gone."  
  
"What are you talking about? You just said we'd--"  
  
"That was the whole point; she can't see this. Just open it. It's from all of us."  
  
Raven took the present and quickly ripped it open, expecting the worst. Into her hands slid a beautiful mirror about the size of a paperback book. "What is it?"  
  
Sirius took Raven's fingertip and put it to her lips. "Say my name."  
  
Raven gave Sirius a confusing look, but said, "Sirius," with her finger still against her lips. Sirius then placed her finger in the center of her mirror. A quiet buzzing sound issued from Sirius' robe pocket and he drew an identical mirror from it. Raven's face appeared on it, and Sirius' face appeared on Raven's mirror. Raven gasped. "Where did you get these?"  
  
"Well, we found two of them in James' parents' basement a few years ago, and then we bought some more in knockturn alley so we could each have one," explained Remus. "Aren't they cool?"  
  
"Yeah, they're cool!" said Raven, excitedly. "How do I get rid of you?"  
  
Sirius laughed. He put his hand over his own mirror and moved it to the side, as though he were wiping her face off of it. Raven did the same with her mirror. "You can't tell Lily. She'll freak out and ask us where we got them and say they're not safe and shit like that."  
  
"Okay," said Raven.  
  
A while later, the six of them were sprawled along the floor, laughing at the present Raven had just opened.  
  
"Alright, now it's time for your real present," said James as he nodded to Sirius.  
  
Sirius began to dig into his pockets again. He pulled out a small box and handed it to Raven. Raven lifted the lid and picked up a miniature guitar, about three inches long. A smile slowly crept along her face and she looked up at the five of them.  
  
"Think you can play that?" asked Sirius. He pointed his wand at it. "Engorgio!" The guitar grew to its normal size. "How about that?" Sirius took off his robe and put his wand back in one of its pockets.  
  
Raven was speechless for a few seconds. "Oh my God! Is this what I think it is?"  
  
"Jonny Lang Signature Model? Yeah," said James, smiling widely.  
  
"Holy shit! There were only 111 of these made!"  
  
"You like it then?" asked Sirius.  
  
"I love it! You guys!" She hugged each of them in turn for a very long time.  
  
(A/N: I ACTUALLY DON'T HAVE ONE, BUT I HAVE AN ELECTRIC OF HIS THAT HE AUTOGRAPHED FOR ME.)  
  
"Padfoot, let's go get the cake," said James. "We left it in the kitchens."  
  
"Oh yeah, I almost forgot!" said Sirius, following James out the door.  
  
"So..." started James, on their way back with the cake.  
  
"So what?" asked Sirius, looking sideways at his best friend.  
  
"Is tonight the night?"  
  
Sirius knew what James meant, but decided to play dumb. "I don't know what you're talking about, Prongs."  
  
"You do, too."  
  
"I don't know, okay?" said Sirius, quickly. "I think for once I'm not gonna decide beforehand."  
  
"That would be a first."  
  
"Yeah... I thought you said you didn't wanna know."  
  
"I don't, I just...I don't, nevermind."  
  
"Okay," said Sirius as they came to Lucy's portrait and it opened for them.  
  
After eating their cake they decided to play a few games of exploding snap.  
  
"Oh, it's almost midnight," said Lily as she picked up Raven's clock. "We need to go to bed."  
  
"Do we have to?" whined James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter in unison.  
  
Lily looked at Raven and rolled her eyes. "Night, Rave. Happy Birthday."  
  
Raven smiled and gave Lily a hug. "Night. Thanks for everything, you guys."  
  
James, Remus, and Peter followed suit. Raven turned to find Sirius picking up the half-eaten cake from the floor. He carried it to her desk and set it down. Raven did the same with the plates and cups.   
  
"Oh here, I'll help you." As Sirius reached for them, he slid on a plate full of cake next to the bed and went down. He landed with a thud on top of the plate, knocking the rest of the plates and cups out of Raven's hands on top of him.  
  
Raven's reaction was delayed. Her hand had gone to her mouth and she was trying not to laugh. She suddenly snorted and then started chuckling.  
  
"Excuse me, did you just snort?"  
  
Raven stopped laughing and shook her head. "Mm-mm." She snorted again and then started laughing again, harder.  
  
Sirius scoffed as Raven put out a hand to help him up. "What do you think it is, your birthday? You think you can laugh at Sirius Black and get away with it?"  
  
Raven nodded and smiled at him. They both picked up the plates and cups from the floor.   
  
3333333333333333333333   
  
"Oh God, you have cake all over you," said Raven as Sirius turned to set the plates on the desk.  
  
Sirius glanced over his shoulder and tried to wipe the cake from the back of his shirt. Then his eyes found Raven and he winked. "Hungry?"  
  
"No. Take off your shirt."  
  
Sirius smiled widely, "Only if you take off yours."  
  
"You have cake all over it; take it off."  
  
Sirius obeyed, clawing his shirt up over his head and throwing it at her. Raven dodged the shirt and it fell to the floor beside her. "Now you," he said, sitting on her bed, swinging his legs up, and putting his hands behind his head. "C'mon, I see cake right there." He pointed to a spot on her shirt.  
  
"Sure you do," said Raven as she quickly lifted her shirt over her head. "Happy?" She balled up her shirt and turned her back on him, bending down to pick up his shirt, too.  
  
Suddenly, Sirius had her around the waist. He spun her around to look at him and took their shirts from her hands. "You move pretty fast, Mr. Black."  
  
"Only when I see something I really want," he said softly.  
  
Raven became a bit nervous as he ran a hand down the middle of her back. She started to ramble. "And perhaps on the Quiddich field when you're getting ready to send a bludger straight for Lucius Malfoy's high and mighty, abnormally large nose?" Sirius nodded. "And perhaps when you feel like hexing the Slytherins in the hallw--"  
  
Sirius suddenly pulled her up to him, kissing her strongly and throwing their shirts into a corner. He pulled away a few seconds later and traced her bottom lip with his finger. "I need for you to stop moving those lips now." He kissed her again, more vigorously. Raven started backing him towards her bed. He jumped as his calves hit the matress but leaned in for another kiss.  
  
Raven put her hand to his chest to stop him. "Wait," she clicked on the radio, "I need for you...to stop playing me now." She shoved him backwards onto the bed. She turned up the volume and then climbed on top of him, leaning down to kiss him.  
  
After a few seconds, Sirius rolled over on top of her. "What makes you think I'm playing you?"  
  
Raven smiled. "Aren't you?"  
  
"You like it," he said, raising his eyebrows twice, "you love it, don't you? You love everything about me, admit it!"  
  
"It's always about you, isn't it?"  
  
"Oh, you love it and you know it!" He took her arms and pinned them behind her back. "You wouldn't know what to do without me."  
  
"Oh really?" she attempted to lean away from him, but he held her securely. "God, you and your ego! You're absolutely hope--"  
  
He pulled her up and silenced her with a firm kiss. She tried to resist for a moment but gave in as Sirius' tongue found its way into her mouth again. He released her hands and pulled her closer. Raven tangled her fingers into the hair at the back of his head. Sirius' mouth moved down her jaw line to her neck. His hand was sliding up her stomach when he jerked away suddenly.  
  
"Rave, if you want me to stop, you'd better tell me now."  
  
"Don't even think about stopping." She pulled his lips onto hers again.  
  
"I remember the stormy weather, the way the sky looks when it's cold. And you were with me, content with walking, so unaware of the world. Please don't drive me home tonight, cuz I don't wanna feel alone. Please don't drive me home tonight, cuz I don't wanna go. Tuesday morning in the dark, I was finding out who you are. I took your picture while you were sleeping, and then I paced around the room. If I had known then that these things happen, would they have happened with you? Please don't drive me home tonight, cuz I don't wanna feel alone. Please don't drive me home tonight, cuz I don't wanna go. Tuesday morning in the dark, I was finding out who I was. And if you turned to see me and I was gone, you should have looked outside your window cuz the sun was coming up. The sun was coming up. Please don't drive me home tonight, cuz I don't wanna feel alone. Tuesday morning in the dark, we were finding out who we are."  
  
They made short work of removing the rest of their clothes. Although strong and hard, Sirius moved slowly and paid close attention to Raven's reactions. He pulled her tighly to his body and she clung to him until he finally collapsed, panting onto her neck. He rolled off of her but shifted and leaned in for a long ending kiss.  
  
"Wow," he said, lazily and wrapped his arm around her.  
  
Raven smiled widely and relaxed onto his chest. "Better than all your other women?"  
  
Sirius laughed. "Hey, no teasing in the afterglow!" They laid in silence for a few minutes and then Sirius took a long breath and let it out. "You tired?"  
  
Raven nodded her head against his chest. Sirius kissed her forehead. "Happy Birthday. Goodnight."  
  
Raven lifted her head and pulled herself up so she was level with him. "Thank you, baby. It was the best birthday I ever had, I mean it."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
"Goodnight."  
  
A/N: GOD, I HATED THAT...DID YOU GUYS THINK IT WAS CRAPPY? I DIDN'T REALLY LIKE IT, BUT MAYBE I'LL EDIT IT LATER. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	32. Chapter 32

Marauder Mayhem  
  
A/N: First of all, I apologize for not updating in awhile. All the sudden I've been getting all these reviews complaining about the Mary-Sueism in this fic and all the modern songs/movies in a fic that's supposed to be set in the 70's. I usually make fun of criticism, but this time it's really bothering me. I was 15 when I started writing this fic 5 years ago, and I didn't know what a Mary-Sue even was. And now that I have 31 chapters, I'll be damned if I'm gonna stop writing it now! I also consider writing fanfiction a hobby, not a research paper. I stuck all those movies and songs in there because I liked them and they fit with the chapter. Anyways, I realized that you guys have all been really great reviewers and I shouldn't punish you for them being stupid. I'm going to try to keep updating regularly, but someday this fic will have to end. Thank you all for being so good to me. Keep the reviews comin.  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, I obviously don't own any HP stuff. you all know that cuz you're not stupid, and even if ya are, it's okay! However, I do own Raven McKinnon and a few other made up characters along the way.  
  
Random Thought #1: "What I'm saying to you is that you are the kind of club-toting, raw meat-eating, me-Tarzan-you-Jane-ing big bald bubblehead who can only count to ten if he's barefoot or wearing sandals." ~Cool Runnings  
  
Chapter 32 - November 14th  
  
"Sirius, are you gonna eat that?" asked Peter, eyeing Sirius' bacon with interest.  
  
Sirius was distracted by the sudden entrance of owls, bringing them their daily mail. He spotted his owl heading straight for him and let out a sigh. After Wheaton landed in Sirius' eggs, he untied the letter from his leg and stroked his feathers absentmindedly.  
  
"Sirius?...Sirius?" tried Peter again.  
  
"Jesus Christ, Pete!" snapped Sirius. He threw the bacon onto Peter's plate. "I'll see you guys in class."   
  
Sirius stood and hurried out of the Great Hall with his letter. Raven got up and followed him up to his dorm. He was lying sitting cross-legged on his bed looking at the letter when Raven came in.   
  
"Is it alright if I...?"  
  
Sirius nodded. She sat behind him, placing her hands on either of his shoulders and squeezing.   
  
"Go on," she said.  
  
Sirius tore open the envelope and unfolded the letter.  
  
Dear Sirius,   
  
Hey Cuz! It's so good to hear from you! I really miss you, too. Ted and I are doing good, but you're not supposed to know that! I'm sorry, I haven't really heard anything about your dad other than what Regulus told you. He's still in at St. Mungo's and they're not releasing him for awhile. They think it might be a heart condition, but as of know he's okay. I'll send you an owl if I hear anything else, I promise.  
  
Love,  
  
Andromeda  
  
Sirius let out a long breath, put the letter aside, and caught Raven's hand on his shoulder.  
  
"From Andromeda?" asked Raven.  
  
Sirius nodded as he slipped his other hand around her waist and pulled her up next to him.  
  
She leaned away from him. "Well, wha'd she say about your dad?"  
  
"The same thing Regulus told me," he responded, kissing at her neck and moving up her jawline.  
  
Raven pulled away. "So he's still at St. Mungos?"  
  
"Stop doing that!" he whined. "Are you okay by last night?"  
  
"More than okay. I just wanted to know what's up with your dad and I think you're trying to distract me."  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes and handed her the letter. He continued kissing along her clavicle as she read. "Not very informative," she said, tossing the letter aside. "I can see why you're frustrated."  
  
"I'm not frustrated!" shouted Sirius, contradicting himself.  
  
"Then what are you doing?"  
  
"What? I can't even kiss you?"  
  
"We have class in like 2 minutes."  
  
Sirius siezed the letter, crumpled it up, and threw it under his bed as he got off of it. "Fine, let's go." He took Raven's hand pulling her from the bed and started to lead her out of the room.  
  
"Padfoot?" Raven stopped.  
  
As Sirius turned around, she put her arms around his neck and kissed him. Raven jumped as he leaned into her and her back touched the wall. He pulled away a few seconds later and smiled at her.  
  
"Happy?"  
  
"Yup!"  
  
They hurried to class, but were still late. Professor McGonagall looked up and frowned as they came in.  
  
"Black, McKinnon, why are you late?"  
  
Sirius was sinking slowly into his chair as he answered, "Because the bell rang before we got here, Professor."  
  
As a few of the students in the class laughed at what he'd said, James leaned over and whispered to Sirius. "Everything alright? Ya know, with your dad?"  
  
Sirius nodded.  
  
After classes they had Quiddich practice. In the locker room, Raven noticed James and Sirius whispering conspiratorially to each other as Jess was talking to her.  
  
"Raven?" Jess asked.  
  
Raven shook her head and turned back to her. "Huh?"  
  
"You are together, aren't you?"  
  
"I'm sorry, what?"  
  
"You and Sirius. I heard a rumor. Is it true?" Jess asked excitedly.  
  
Raven ignored it. "Do you think they're up to something?" She nodded toward James and Sirius.  
  
Jess turned to look at them and shrugged. Sirius reached into his locker and brought out his water bottle. James smelled it and laughed. They hid it behind their back as they heard Justin approaching. Raven watched as Justin filled his own bottle with water from the tap and set it on the bench next to him as he dressed. James quickly switched the bottles. Raven slid over next to Sirius.  
  
"What are you doing?" she said into his ear.  
  
Sirius jumped. "Nothing."  
  
"What's in there?"  
  
"What's in where?" smiled James innocently.  
  
Sirius smiled deviously at Raven and put his finger to his lips. "Wait and see."  
  
"C'mon you guys! Justin's stressed enough."  
  
"Shh!!!" Sirius covered her mouth. "This'll make him laugh."  
  
Justin finished dressing and turned around. "Alright everyone, listen up."  
  
He took a long swig from the bottle as everyone gathered around him. He made a disgusted face as he swallowed and threw the bottle aside. James and Sirius started to crack up and hid behind Raven.  
  
"Now...toes need our really be on to we."  
  
James, Mundungus, and Sirius erupted into laughter. Raven bit her tongue to keep herself from giggling.  
  
"Hell what the?"  
  
Sirius was doubled over holding his stomach, and James was on the floor and Dung sat on the bench and started to fan his red face. Laurel and Jess just kind of looked from James and Sirius to Justin.  
  
"Do guys what you did? Right it fix now!"  
  
Jess, Laurel, and Raven suddenly joined in on the laughter.  
  
"I'm your ass gonna kick!"  
  
A fresh wave of laughter spread throughout the team. This time Justin broke down and chuckled with them.  
  
"I'm your ass?! Hahahahahaha!!!!!" choked Mundungus.  
  
Justin finally realized that if he waited long enough between words, he could fool the potion into thinking he had finished speaking. He said each word one at a time with a sufficient gap inbetween. "Fix...it...now...Black!"  
  
"Help you, I will!" replied Sirius in his best Yoda voice.  
  
This spurred a new chorus of laughter.  
  
"You just hafta let it wear off, Wood," said James. "It's a word scrambler potion. Brilliant, huh? How'd it taste?"  
  
Justin rolled his eyes. "It...tasted...like...shit."  
  
"That would make sense. It smelled like shit, too," James said.  
  
By the middle of practice the potion had worn off and Justin was 'back to Drill Sargeant Wood,' as Sirius said. The team then noticed the Slytherin team standing at the edge of the pitch, watching them. Sirius and James landed first and strode over to them. The rest of the Gryffindors followed.  
  
"What exactly do you think you're doing? We're practicing. Go away," said Sirius, eyeing Lucius with dislike.  
  
"We booked the pitch for today," replied Lucius.  
  
"After I did. You'll just have to wait, Malfoy," said Justin.  
  
"The hell I will! You've had it long enough."  
  
"How about you play us for it?" challenged Sirius.  
  
Lucius laughed malevolently. "You want to play us?"  
  
"You're right, that would be a joke. I guess we could just duel," said Sirius, pulling out his wand and taking a step forward.  
  
Lucius reflexively pulled his wand and they started to circle each other.  
  
Raven rolled her eyes. "Let's just play, alright?"  
  
They rose into the air and started the game.   
  
James had already scored three goals. Bellatrix had decided to tail Raven until she saw the snitch. Raven kept going into dives and faking her out and by the look on her face, Bellatrix was getting pissed.   
  
James weaved around two Slytherins and passed to Jess. As she scored, Raven went into a real dive and caught the snitch just before Sirius hit a bludgers straight at Malfoy. It hit him right in the crotch and he fell some 4 feet from his broom, grabbing his groin and moaning.  
  
"Walk it off," said Sirius, landing next to Raven and winking at her.  
  
A/N: I TRIED TO DO A LITTLE LONGER CHAPTER TO MAKE UP FOR NOT UPDATING IN AWHILE. SORRY GUYS AND THANX FOR UNDERSTANDING. PLEASE REVIEW! 


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